Do you ever tell someone you're fine when you aren't?

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I tend to do this alot since I like keeping my emotional state and feelings to myself and IMO it's no ones Business. So does anyone else do this and why?

All the time. It's expected usually. It's what people say in passing as a pleasantry. If an old friend sits down with you and asks the same question,then you can take it literally and choose whether you want to go into it or not.

Yes because I don't want to talk about my personal feelings and I want to be left alone. So in some ways I am fine, fine by how I am and I don't need people bugging me.


I don't know why I can't just say I don't want to talk about it or leave me be. I find it difficult to say those words.

Yes. Sometimes, it's because I don't want to be a bother. Others, it's because I don't want others to bother me.

nice to see you back btw pschristmas

Once I realized that people really didn't care about the details, "Fine" became my normal response.

All the time until they see me when I act around people.

I usually say: I could be worse. Which is true.

ruveyn

I think everybody does that.

All the time... it's the daily meet-and-greet script.

And yes, it is also contextual... if my partner asks, she gets a much more genuine answer, even if it's "I can't talk about it right now." She's wise enough to know that when I get ready to talk about it, IF I get ready to talk about it, I will. She's signalling that she's noticed I've got something brewing inside, and she's willing to listen.

Other people may ask in genuine concern, and then I decide whether I can trust them or if I just don't want to get into it.

Yes, I do it all the time but then they could always read my body language somehow when I'm really upset or have been in an argument.

They be like "Are you ok?" and I be like "yes I'm ok" and they be like "you don't look ok, now now, what's wrong?" and sometimes I try to deny it because I feel that some people don't understand.

I do this a lot. I do it for different reasons. The most common reason is probably because I don't sense a high enough trust level in the relationship to feel comfortable with what may be very personal things.

If I do trust a person enough I might still sometimes just tell them I'm "fine". I don't want to be telling them the truth all the time and I've every desire to show a positive face to them.

When I'm not doing well I usually respond to "how's it going" with "okay" but use a tone of voice that signals "could be better". I only say "good" when I'm actually in a good mood. There's no way to say "good" in a convincing tone when I'm not good at all.

Ive learned that this "How are you?" question is a game....they say "how are you?" you say "Im fine, and you?"....Ive gotten very good at it but sometimes I forget to ask how they are and just say "Im fine". I dont get it but I play the game because Ive been told that it is polite. People really dont want to know how you are its just one of those stupid small talk nice nice thingies. I go on and on about this kind of stuff to my husband all the time. He always just tells me "thats just the way it is...its sort of like a game". When I was younger I told people how I was or I just said "fine" and walked away. I wasnt aware that I was rude nor was I aware of the "game".