How not to be rude
I'm not sure if I have asperger's or not. I definitely wouldn't say I did until a professional told me so. I just feel like reading about the topic has answered some questions I've had about myself for a long time and the quiz told me I would be a candidate. I'm not sure I want to spend the time/money to get checked out. My problem is how to deal with coworkers since that's where my personality seems to clash the most. My coworkers don't understand why I'd rather work alone, don't laugh at their jokes or don't participate in small talk with them. Sometimes I try to do these things but it just seems awkward and unsuccessful. I've heard them say I'm weird and that they think I hate them(which I do not). How do I convey that I'm not meaning to be rude it's just they way I function?
^I think it would be worth sharing this info with them too.
Maybe you could say something like, "I hope it doesn't seem like I'm trying to be rude, I just traditionally have worked alone and am used to that style."
I think it will be beneficial to you to try a bit of the team approach when possible. If your job doesn't require working on a team that's great, but do try to keep on friendly terms with your co-workers. A wave/nod and a "how's it going?" are fine skills for your repertoire.
If you do find out you're on the spectrum, I would not disclose to coworkers (unless they're solid friends and it's your preference to do so).
Dear_one
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I'd be cautious about explaining my differences as Asperger's. It can cause confusion with other aspies, and no two are alike. Introverts also work better alone, and that would cover it. Where you do interact, try to smile a lot, but keep it brief. If you keep trying to change the subject to one that interests only you, or ask too-basic questions about theirs, they'll be happy to ignore you.
I have no interest in team sports, and would caution you about joking about them to fans. One morning during the Stanley Cup playoffs, I teased the crew with "So, how's the Clarence Cup going? - Oh, Stanley, Stanley Cup." This was not considered funny.
I made that mistake once with my dad, who is a big football fan. England were playing Germany and lost. I came home from visiting a couple of friends who were also watching the match (one of who was German) and cheerfully said to my dad, "Yay, Germany won!". He went absolutely mad at me! It's not something I'll do again.
_________________
Diagnosed: Asperger's Syndrome (ICD-10)
Self-Diagnosed: Aphantasia
Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 152 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 46 of 200
Listener of all things noisy, viewer of all things bloody, writer of all things sh*t.
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