Hate family get togethjer

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They are filled with opeople I don't know and are barly related to, and if you are not dating ,marries, have kids, and you dont like sports you get pushed to thowrds the kids, who generaly just run around and screaming. I typically get some barbecue eat, and go to my car and listen to my ipod till its over. Sometimes people (those I know ell) Relizes Im gone(everyone else doesnt) and look for me, asking me why I left. Its not fun for me. My friends and pets are more family to me then these peiople, Im not having fun, and since I dont live their lives noone wants to intact with me. Most of the conversations are basically canned, and are just recaps of last years conversations. Its not that I down right hate them, I do it for the handful of people that nmean something to me. Just noone bothers to intecr act with me on my terms, so why should I do that with them. Basically.....
If your 18 or ver, not dating, engage, married, trying to have, having, or had kids, or not into s[orts, noone really wants anything to do with you. I could have come up with a unified feild theory and noone would care.

I hate family get togethers too. First everyone nags me about coming and doesn't leave me alone until I agree to come and then when I'm there nobody says a word to me the whole time and if I try to say something people ignore it and act like I'm not there. I really don't see the point in going to such gatherings. I don't enjoy them at all.

I'm with you on that. I hate family get togethers. Unless.. my brother and my awful sister in law and their bratty kids are not going to be in the picture.. but most of the family get togethers involves them so... I hate those moments too. And I can't blame being under the spectrum on that, I just cannot stand my brother's family!

I can understand why people hate that...people have me 'help them' with their crap (moving things, etc...) sometimes and that's annoying too...

Yes they're boring as hell and if you don't care about all that socializing BS it's a waste of time. Unless there's something else to do, like fish, or ride ATVs, or just walk around away from evertone...but then you're anti-social...

you've nailed it pretty well here mate, that's why I hate these types of get-togethers too. thank god I dont have to do them anymore.

hey mate I agree with you completely bro.. my dad's side of my family isn't as bad, but my mom's side of my family is lame.. they dont care about me and i dont care about them.. mind you id rather not be heckled and interrogated anyways.. but families are judgemental places to be.. im happy living thousands of miles away from them

actually it's sis ;p
sorry for the slang



same here

I kind of disliked family get togethers when it was with my mums siblings and children as there was always issues, well mostly with one Auntie and my cousins as they were nice but a bit ignorant. Here newest child is a toddler was getting dressed in skank clothes, one of them used to live with us but was cleptomaniac/liar and one of them kind of looks like they are simular to her. There mother has schizophrenia and is alway letting the kids take advantage of here and my grandfather, not getting them to go to achool, and she is often doing the oh I am better no and not takeing medication. It seems lie my schizophrenic Uncle who is not married often keeps to himself and is smart enough to keep out of it.

But now the family that is near me is my mums uncle and auntie, there sons and daughters and there children, the kids are quite young and are a bit fun to play with. Also they are mostly all pretty good with disscusions in that I look forward to the get togethers, we have also helped some of them move, but I was happy to help and directed my complaints to my parents.

The old folks have deep connections, and seeing each other once a year is meaningful to them. Seeing each other's kids is also meaningful to the old people. I can't explain why it's good to see them even when you can't really interact. It just is. I do care about them. I wish I could find a way to connect better while the kids are young. I'm sure I will when they are older.

I haven't thought of it in years, but you guys are right. If you've only seen them five times in your life and can't even remember which uncle is which, I can see how that would be pretty lame. What could you do to make the event better? Anything?

As for the dysfunctional families, re-living old wars that will never end... Your parents would do better to move on and forget them, but that's hard to admit.

Some families honestly believe that using the kids as scapegoats is acceptable, that it's a privilege that comes with age. They just peck at the kids as a conversation piece when they have nothing better to talk about. I've seen old women compete to see who can yell the loudest and make the kids jump the highest, and openly laugh about it. (Watch how easily I can make this kid cry.) It's just part of the culture and they don't see anything wrong with it. This is a big chunk of what they mean when they say, "respect your elders."

That's my case...I grew up in one and I always was the only one trying to bring us together again. It will never work even when I now explain I have asperger...they don't believe or want to and in their view I'm only trying to grab attention of look like a whimp. I haven't been able to raise a family that would last. Decided to leave my kids with their mom so I wouldn't pass on the dysfunctionallity of my youth. But that was wrong too, because my son refuses to contact me and to him I am an irresponsible father who abandoned his children.

I feel so miserable I haven't been able to make it perfect are flawless

why are your kids refusing to talk with you?because it might be that your wife talked bad about you?
or did you leave your wife/childeren for other reasons than just devorcing?

My daughter still replies my emails, though in one liners. She was the first born but always accused us not loivng her, which was BS, she ahd always all the attention and her mum spoiled her and still does with anything she wants she gets. Girls are drawn to their dads, boys to their mum.
My son, always preferred his mum and still does. he is metal and we have much in common ( I was punk when 16) and he does what every teenager does at his age.
On his webblog he told his friends that he hated his name( DAví) to which I replied that I chose the name but if he wished he could still find another name for himself like Indians do through a ritual or something. just for that remark he banned me from his website..that hurt. Both my kids were bullied at school and I an my partner when we were young too. So we understand.

But it hurts me that he refuses to write to me and so. Children forget what parents did for them and with them when they were 5 and older. I wasn't home much but I gave him and her quality attention when I was there.
Their mum always told them how irresponsable a father I was or probably that I didn'tlove them enough and they believe that.
I simply couldn't function as a father because of her, she was both dad and mum and I felt trodden over, losing my respect with the kids, so I preferred to leave them, so they'd be happy with her.

I've always hated family 'get-togethers', mainly because my family treat me with a poisonous mixture of pity and contempt.

The last was at my brother's wedding, two weeks ago. I said I didn't want to go. I implored them to let me not go. But I was told that it would look bad if I wasn't there. They even got my brother to use emotional blackmail to make me go.

I believe it was a 'face' thing. It would reflect badly on my parents if I wasn't there, so I had to be there, no matter how much suffering I had to go through. To get through it, I got thoroughly drunk and spent most of the time being patronised by people I barely knew, especially my aunt, who treats me as though I am 5.

No, my family have no time for me. I am merely someone who needs to be wheeled out to prove I still exist for the sake of family unity. I am not a person, merely a basket case who has to be bullied into doing what is expected of me. This is why I am in the process of moving out, with the eventual aim of having as little to do with my family as possible.

Why don't we just start our own country somewhere.

The relatives of mine that still talk to me treat me the way they did when I was a teenager. Those that do not talk to me are angry that I live in California, drive a foreign car, have an Asian wife, and refuse to join a union or vote for Democrats. So when I do attend family get-togethers, I eat a plate of food, trade email addies and phone numbers, then leave.

They're all union workers from white, racist Michigan, y'see...

I don't like family get togethers either. Last one was my last surviving aunts funeral. I have always been an outsider & it was still apparent at the funeral. Lots of dirty looks from extended family. My mom's family (dad's too) have always treated me as though I am an unwanted intruder. Doesn't matter that I didn't ask to be a part of their family, nor would I have had I been asked anyway! Thankfully, those days will be gone in a matter of a few years & I can live my own life my own way.