Going Non-Verbal
I don't know if anyone can help me, but I have AS and am wondering if you could give me some advice.....
When I am in a social situation that I don't feel good in (most social situations distress me, except with certain friends and family members), or in a noisy environment without my earplugs, I have been going non-verbal. This didn't occur so much in the past. But now I find myself completely unable to speak when I am anxious due to overload (whether that be sensory or social). In freshers' week (university), my good friend came with me to help me out (as my uni support worker hadn't been organised by then) and I ended up having a texting conversation with him while he was sitting right next to me because there were so many people there and it was so noisy. I couldn't speak, and then someone asked me my name and my friend had to tell the person my name
Sorry that was long
Question is, what can I do in such a situation?
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I am a partially verbal classic autistic. I am a pharmacology student with full time support.
hey steelmaiden.......sorry you are having a difficult time.
when i was a child i developed a terrible stutter due to 'trauma'. the relentless abuse from nt's and family made me decide to just not talk. only went to school about half the time. it was not easy, but it can be done. going mute, that is. no phone. no anything.
it's hard to do what you're doing. BUT, you can get through it. i learned to always carry a notepad and something to write with.
a gazillion years later and i still have trouble speaking. i survived even though i had no one to help me. you are fortunate to have a friend to help you.
i hope you can get through this and past this. do not be afraid to seek professional help. i had to wait until i was an adult to seek assistance but by then it was essentially too late.
hang in there. don't give up.
When I am in a social situation that I don't feel good in (most social situations distress me, except with certain friends and family members), or in a noisy environment without my earplugs, I have been going non-verbal. This didn't occur so much in the past. But now I find myself completely unable to speak when I am anxious due to overload (whether that be sensory or social). In freshers' week (university), my good friend came with me to help me out (as my uni support worker hadn't been organised by then) and I ended up having a texting conversation with him while he was sitting right next to me because there were so many people there and it was so noisy. I couldn't speak, and then someone asked me my name and my friend had to tell the person my name
Sorry that was long
Question is, what can I do in such a situation?
You're several years older than me, but I've experienced the same thing many times. It's like I cannot speak no matter how hard I try. My brain just feels like it's just... off. It feels completely, utterly horrible.
It happens to me sometimes. I'm thinking of designing a card to carry around with me that explains why I can't talk at the moment, because no matter how many times I try to explain to my parents/friends/other family members why this happens, the next time it happens they just think I'm being stubborn and get mad at me again. I can't think what to put on the card, though. Any ideas?
My son gets mute at times, especially when he's tired or anxious. He's been learning to sign, and he uses that, sometimes, when he's unable to speak but wants to communicate. A card could just say "I am autistic, and sometimes become mute. This is one of those times." If you want to invite further contact, you could say you'd be happy to connect by email, and include an email address.
Pen and paper is a good idea. Personally, I don't go mute often enough to find that practical though.
I'd like to try learning some sign language...or maybe at least enough to make someone say "Oh, yeah...I don't understand sign."
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I'm looking for Someone to change my life. I'm looking for a Miracle in my life.
My son was selectively mute when he was about four and spent six months in daycare--he didn't say anything at all for several months while he was at the center even though he could talk a little (though not normally or at age level). What really helped him out was Prozac--made him all of a sudden start to talk a lot--though not correctly or at the correct age level.
I was selectively mute also when I was in elementary school. I talked at home, but not at school. (I don't know if I used correct speech for my age, though). From what I have read and heard, it is normally considered an elementary school thing, but I don't see why it cannot be an adult thing, too.
I actually recently received a prescription for valium, which I only take when I am stressed. I took it a couple of times recently before public speaking situations, and it really helped. I am no longer selectively mute, but public speaking tends to make my voice shake really badly and I can barely think.
Thank you for all your responses
I think I will carry pen and paper with me, but it's seriously embarrassing in university
Luckily I don't often have to talk. People text me much more than call me and I don't talk at all to to the other students. I can talk to my tutor and my mentor though
I am selectively mute for a large proportion of my waking hours, where I will onlly talk to my Dad, my friend, the carer (I live in supported accommodation) and perhaps my tutor if I really must
However I do sometimes get "breakthroughs" where I can actually talk to the other students in my class, but only short sentences
I never talk to the other people I live with, only the carer, but he only visits for a short while in the evening
_________________
I am a partially verbal classic autistic. I am a pharmacology student with full time support.
Actually I guess the first time I posted, I missed the part where you said you were texting your friend. It would probably be easier for you to just write a text, show your phone to whoever you need, and then erase the text.
_________________
I'm looking for Someone to change my life. I'm looking for a Miracle in my life.
Thanks, that's a good idea
_________________
I am a partially verbal classic autistic. I am a pharmacology student with full time support.
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