Some questions about those who get obsessed with people....

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Is having obsessions with people the social side of you coming out? I was just wondering, because I've been obsessed with people since my first real obsession (which was at age 11). There are some Aspies out there who have a tendancy of developing obsessions with certain but various people throughout their lives, and I'm one of those Aspies.
I was just wondering, if the Autistic brain isn't wired to be as social as the average person, then how come some Aspies have obsessions over people, instead of facts and objects and other things besides people? How come I do? Does it mean, as a female with very mild AS, there's an ''NT side'' to me, which is trying to show itself onto the surface? I just don't get why some Aspies get affected by obsessions with people. I know sometimes it can be natural for anyone to get a bit obsessed over someone they have a crush on, but for me it's an obsession what takes over my life, whether they're married or hate me or laughing at me or don't know I exist or what, it's still an intense obsession what won't go away, and I feel the urge to want to get to know them and get involved, and I really don't care how much social effort it takes. I hate going to parties, but if I was invited to a party in order to get to know a man I am obsessed with, I'd be there!

Personally, I don't like being obsessed with people. It emotionally jeopardizes me from getting relationships with other men who are outside my obsession. Once I went to meet a man (who I wasn't obsessed with or anything), and I saw a man who I was obsessed with on my way to my new boyfriend's house, and I felt very depressed and decided I hated my new boyfriend because my whole mind was filled up with this man I was obsessed with, and didn't want anybody else but him and him only.

Another strange thing - I am now obsessed with a group of bus-drivers, and I am talking to one or two of them, and when I talk to them, I'm like an NT. All of my social phobias go away, I ask questions confidentally, I am better at offering opinions and advice, I'm not afraid to speak up, I know what's socially appropriate and what's not......and yet, anyone else I speak to I am my normal Aspie self (or socially phobic self). Even when I looked in the bus mirror I noticed I looked a completely different girl because my blank expression had gone from my face and I suddenly got colour in my cheeks and a really sociable face......It's like when I speak to people I'm obsessed with, I get a sort of a taste of NT.

Is this normal? How can I act like this if my brain isn't wired to ever become like this? It must be in me somewhere then. But I just don't see why some Aspies would have more of a tendancy to get obsessed with people. It's weird.

I guess if we have specialized interests with things, we can do it with people also.

I am one of those that is obsessed with "people" but they have mostly been fictional characters and by extension the actors that play them.

I've often wondered if this is just something that everyone normally does because regular people are "obsessed" with celebrities all the time and plaster their walls with posters, etc. I do feel that it is different from theirs if only by the sheer severity of the obsession. When I have an Interest in someone it is literally the ONLY thing I ever think about or talk about or do in my spare time - something related to or that reminds me of my interest. I don't think this is the same as what "normal" people do, although I could be wrong. (I mean to NT's learn Quenya because they like Elijah Wood? )

It's possible that obsessions with people tends to be a female thing since females are naturally wired to be more social?

You seem to be equating "NT" with "social" which I am not sure is the case. There are plenty of social aspies who have no problems talking to people, but who have a very hard time drawing appropriate lines i.e. being too informal/familiar with complete strangers. I've met one of these before. It was extremely embarassing to me that he was walking up and touching and rambling at complete strangers. I could never do that and I find it totally awkward and I imagine the people must have been like "who the hell is this guy??".

People with AS typically have trouble understanding appropriate social behavior but they are not always reclusive. Some are outgoing. So your ability to speak to people at times wouldn't disqualify you in my opinion. In some of the articles that I have read, they talk about aspies desiring friends but having difficulty finding/keeping them due to social difficulties. So they typically WANT to sociallize, but are just bad at it.

My husband wants friends and wants to be popular and etc whereas I do not want friends and have no desire to socialize with anyone at all and would be perfectly fine being completely isolated.

I've gotten obsessed with people before but now today I just ignore those people and pretend they don't exist when they are present. That's how I control those obsessions. In the past it has given me problems where I wouldn't leave them alone and I kept following them or calling one of them constantly. Now I just ignore them and pretend they don't exist and I try and treat them like everyone else. But they are in my head constantly and I get fantasies about them.

Some aspies do get people obsessions and so do some none ASDs so that is why stalking happens. Plus sometimes they have a mental illness that causes such behavior.