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acd9881
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29 Apr 2012, 7:48 pm

I am a special education teacher working with 7th,8th and 9th grade students with ASD. I am trying to teach my students to advocate for their needs in the classroom with general education teachers. What fears or concerns were most present for you when asking for help as as a student with ASD?



fleurdelily
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29 Apr 2012, 7:59 pm

Fears..... being laughed at, being told to just 'suck it up' and deal. Being disbelieved. I was the 'invisible' child... I loathed to bring attention to myself. I always had a hard time in math, and in middle school there was one (ONE!? !) parent-teacher meeting. That's it. Nothing changed, I am still dismal in math to this day. So, lesson learned about asking for help ... was DON'T. It was embarrasing, and completely useless. I wish better luck to your students.


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Tuttle
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29 Apr 2012, 8:25 pm

One of the problems with my parents advocating for me (because that's much of what happened), was them saying they were just lying, that those things couldn't be true about me)



Verdandi
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29 Apr 2012, 8:54 pm

Tuttle could you clarify:

Was it your parents who said someone was lying? And who is the someone who is lying?



WerewolfPoet
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29 Apr 2012, 9:01 pm

Sometimes, I had (and probably still have) some difficulty distinguishing between something that I should be able to get over/solve myself and something that requires help from another person. For example, I often saw asking the teacher for clarification as the absolute last resort. I felt as it was my responsibility as an "honor" student to leave the teacher to their bidding and resolve the issue on my own. This works out well in academic situations, but it can lead to issues in social situations when one is being bullied far beyond what is socially acceptable "jesting" and one is unaware that the invisible barrier has been breached.
Best of luck getting your students to communicate with you. If it makes you feel any better, it is often not personal: I scarcely even reveal the true extent of many of my needs to my own parents.



Tuttle
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29 Apr 2012, 9:42 pm

Verdandi wrote:
Tuttle could you clarify:

Was it your parents who said someone was lying? And who is the someone who is lying?


My teachers claimed that my parents were lying about me and that I'd be lying.

They couldn't understand the idea of someone with my abilities, or the fact that someone with my abilities would have my disabilities.

The idea of a 2e kid was one that was very hard for some of my teachers to understand, which meant I got treated like I was just another average person.



Cubits
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29 Apr 2012, 10:41 pm

WerewolfPoet wrote:
Sometimes, I had (and probably still have) some difficulty distinguishing between something that I should be able to get over/solve myself and something that requires help from another person. For example, I often saw asking the teacher for clarification as the absolute last resort. I felt as it was my responsibility as an "honor" student to leave the teacher to their bidding and resolve the issue on my own. This works out well in academic situations, but it can lead to issues in social situations when one is being bullied far beyond what is socially acceptable "jesting" and one is unaware that the invisible barrier has been breached.
Best of luck getting your students to communicate with you. If it makes you feel any better, it is often not personal: I scarcely even reveal the true extent of many of my needs to my own parents.


This EXACTLY. In fact, i just revealed ( at 28 ) to my father that i had been diagnosed with ASD, and all of the troubles i had growing up.

When i was struggling i wouldn't just not ask for help, but expend energy in hiding that difficulty from people. I have no idea why, perhaps due to not wanting to bother anyone. Yet the whole time i actually wished someone would come to me and offer to help, and ignore me saying no.

Yeah, i get it, i'm insane. ;P