Advertising ASDs as "something to fix" makes it wo

Post Reply New Topic

I have been seeing many YouTube videos plus a few Autism organisations where they bring across how everyone should feel sorry for kids with an ASD with the underlying tone being that they are "wrong", "damaged", "ret*d" even, and that we all need to donate money to help "fix" them so that they can be like everyone else.

Am I the only one who sees this as wrong?

From my opinion, having an ASD just means you have a different set of strengths and weaknesses to NTs. Everyone has their different set of strengths and weaknesses, and I believe the greatest help is simply for people to understand that (a) others CAN have differences that are neurologically based, and (b) WHAT those differences are, and to treat them with respect.

From my understanding, one of the biggest challenges people with an ASD have is the way that the World treats them as though they ARE "wrong", "damaged", "ret*d". If people just accepted and understood us then things would be ok. I am quite happy spending time on my own, learning about my interests, seeing the Word differently to others. Sure, there are many difficulties also, but I think NTs have their difficulties also (many can't cope if they have to spend time on their own, many get bored easily and have to keep following the latest trends and be controlled by that World constantly because they are unable to see things from a different perspective, etc).

I understand there are some with difficulties that would benefit from getting help with, like with some classic autism cases where they need carers to help the family, etc. But for the rest of the spectrum, I believe it is the stigma associated with ASDs that cause the greatest damage, so why do organisations/parents keep CREATING this stigma??

I just wish there were more videos simply explaining how their child is different, without having all the sad and soppy music and explaining how horrible a condition it is.... What will happen to their child when they become a teenager and suddenly everyone treats them badly because of the stigma that has been created for them?

Or have I totally missed the point here ? (it does happen )

I think I agree with you, but I know that most aspies see AS as a disorder and not as a difference, including this website, and most aspies believe they can gain enough social skills "fixing" to pass for NTs.

I don't agree, but that's the general tendency at this point in time in the world.

Moreover, very soon the word Asperger's won't exist anymore (as of the new DSM) and then you won't be able to argue that AS is just a different set of strengths and weaknesses, because you'll be talking about Autism instead, and that includes all the classic autism cases, and those deserve the sad music and donations even if the public is educated, because they can't survive without round-the-clock care.

It is my opinion that the world we higher functioning autistics / aspies want to see of our differences being celebrated and tolerated, is still very far from us, and currently the trend is towards more distance rather than less. However, you have to take into account that most aspies want it THIS way, because tolerance and celebration of difference doesn't give you social security money. So many aspies react very aggressively if you bring up the topic of AS just being a difference.

I think it will take 1 or 2 generations of aspies who got all the social skills workshops and school support and social benefits and early diagnoses required and yet realized it makes no difference in social integration, before aspies (i.e. high-functioning autistics) are ready to accept that we need tolerance and celebration more than we need social benefits / donations.

This is one thing we hfa don't have in common with the LGBT movement - they never called themselves disordered in order to receive government help. So their social acceptance fight went along a straight line upwards, not continuously set back for generations by the request for money.

Thanks Moondust, that helps shed some light on it for me, and you make many very valid points.

I guess I still can't quite get past the point that if the World saw having an ASD as an ok thing, then maybe aspies wouldn't feel as though they had to keep trying in order to be like everyone else (it appears that many want to fit in with the World purely to avoid the negative consequences of how NTs can treat us. Hence, if NTs didn't treat us badly, then there would be no great desire to have to become like them).
And I believe that if there was a greater understanding and respect for us out there, then things like getting a job, performing to our best at that job, etc, would be easier and hence there would be no need for social security money. Maybe I am a dreamer, but hey many minority groups have flipped things round to make things better for themselves, so it isn't totally impossible....

It does make it difficult that aspies will now be classified as being within the ASD umbrella. Because I am indeed all for those who need 24-hour care to have access to that. It kind of (in my mind) seems that by putting us all under the same umbrella, what could help one end could make the other end worse (needing more attention for the difficulties of the more classic autism end creates the stigma and teasing and unfair treatment of the higher functioning/aspie end, and getting more attention for this end with regard to our strengths and how much we have to offer and that we are simply "different" doesn't help the classic autism end get the help they need....)

Very good points!! ! Thanks for your reply, it helps me get clearer on this issue. It would be interesting to see the difference between those that were diagnosed young and had "early intervention" vs those who were never diagnosed until adulthood when they had already learnt their own lessons....
I wonder if in some ways, it may disempower those who have early intervention. In that they feel more "disabled" because they would always believe that they only "succeeded" due to outside help and hence they must really be disabled. Versus those who taught themselves who might feel more empowered for having done it on their own.... Just a thought.

I have seen some videos like this, and I do agree. I have also seen some with the sad music and request for donations just because their child likes playing on their own, or prefers playing with dirt instead of mainstream toys, and because he is not good at eye contact, etc. My immediate reaction was "So what?" So he is different and he enjoys different things, doesn't mean we have to feel as though he is not "right" and we need funding to "fix" him.... It just gets to me sometimes...

classic autism doesnt necessarily present like that and would those people still want pity? they'd still be impacted by the ablism these ads propagate. the state should fund services for those who require more care not leave it up to charities who will end up exploiting people to make a buck. i agree with the ops original statement.

I reject the DSM, charities, therapies, liberal pity, pills, donations and stupid media distortions.

Supposedly computers are making society increasingly atomized, alienated and specialized. So we are the new wave of normal.

All the hand-holding co-dependent bleeding hearts will be the curiosities.

I'll toss 'em a quarter when I see 'em jobless on the street.

I may be one of the few who actually want to get fixed. I want to be able to connect to another person on the same deep level a NT does and be able to simply function and feel as a normal person.

I used to be one of those people who are proud of being autistic, thinking that we are just people who think a little differently, but being around more low functioning aspies made me realize how much autism hurt the people around the autistic person. I realized that the more low functioning aspies were hurting me with their coldness and insensitivity in the same way I've been hurting NTs around me.

If someone is happy with being autistic, then nobody should force any sort of treatment on that person. But if someone actually wants to get better, nobody should try to stop that person from doing so.

As for the strenghts typical for aspies, I've observed them in some NT individuals, so there is no reason it couldn't be possible to cure the negative parts os Aspergers without losing the good parts of it.

What if I want to be a hand-holding co-dependent bleeding heart? Not all autistics are proud of their coldness and alienation

Well, it's an (albeit sad) fact that young aspies, being young and inexperienced, with parents as inexperienced as them, prefer the hope given by the lure of consumism to accepting the reality that we can never pass for NT no matter what. The lure is attractive, just take a glance at the ads to the left as I type: "Ask an AS doctor", "How I overcame Autism", and the zillions of books, workshops, etc. A new, avid market to sell to, which will take decades to become disenchanted and stop consuming. You and I can't fight marketing, only time will make the disenchanted aspies refuse to pay for such useless goods when their kids' time comes and to demand tolerance instead. We have everything against us right now - marketing, the young generations, the classic autistics issue mentioned above, the quick fix of social benefits for the hfa........and even many aspies themselves who are planning to live on the lectures, videos, books and art that they produce as aspies that "made it in the NT world". This is not our time. I won't live to see it due to my age, but I'm optimistic that the time will come when our ideas will be the ones shared by all aspies.

I think it's the healthiest thing to do at this time and in light of the circumstances, to accept that we're not tolerated nor celebrated, and do the most with what we each have going for us, and not build any expectations from society or from any kind of "support".

If you read my thread "Cliche advice that sets us back", you can already see disenchanted young aspies who are not doing any better than we did, in spite of all the "support" they're getting at home, school, social security, etc. It's happening a lot sooner than I thought it would. Just a few years back, when I said social skills workshops don't make a big difference, everyone was on me. Now the young aspies are starting to tell a different story.

I agree with most of your point. While I was researching ASD after I uncovered my leanings, I found a statistic that 1 out of 25 people are ASP to one degree or another. That's pretty common to be labeled a "syndrome" or "disorder". Yeah, there are some things that I'd like in my life -- a good relationship, a few friends who gave a $#!+ about me, to not be so clumsy, and to be a little more comfortable at social gatherings -- but for the most part, I'm not too disturbed by it all. It more relieved me that all my little quirks could be explained.

I don't see it at a disability at all, for the most part. There's good and bad in everything. There are A-type personalities who are driven and ambitious and passionate, but who can become arrogant workaholics or jealous wifebeaters; there are the easygoing B-type personalities who can descend into purposeless couch potatoes. Each type has trouble accepting the other type. Whose to say that ASPies aren't just another personality type? Logical, focused and intelligent, but can turn into fearful anti-social malaprops. We could be called O-Types (oddball, offbeat, etc) or H-types (High-Functioning) or L-Types (logical).

The thing is that the people who are labeling us as "disordered" need to get over the idea that there is such a thing as "normal". Why does everyone have to be social? Why does everyone have to follow trends and fads? Why does everyone have to...be like everyone? My family doesn't think I'm "normal" for wanting to be alone with my books, movies and thoughts, while I'm perfectly happy there. At the same time, seeing them always socializing, trying in vain to be the center of attention boggles my mind. Why in the world would someone WANT to be the center of attention?!?! Nope, I'm gonna see it as just another way of looking at things until someone proves to me that there is something "wrong" with me.

I agree that our brains are just different and that it's not a disorder to be "fixed".

However, other people don't get that. At age 31, I am still treated like a "ret*d" child. And I remember my mom and sister calling me ret*d when I was a little kid. I am anything but ret*d.



G.

The so-called professionals have been saying for years and years and years that autistic people can't ever do anything due to being autistic, so of course the only thing to do is to fix them to get rid of the autism. That's the public perception of autism, and many parents of autistic children have that belief as well. It is horrible for all kinds of autistic people all over the spectrum.