Intense hatred for bullies

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I wish death on all those that bullied me in school, even though that was years ago. Probably will feel that way forever, though I don't think much about it nowadays, repressed the memories enough.

I know how it is. I have often dreamed of getting revenge (legally!) somehow, but I am never around them anymore. Anyhow, getting revenge can seem pathetic and demeaning. And futile--the painful memories will always haunt me. Revenge won't erase them and may make it worse. If I were to ever cross paths with them, I would probably not speak to them, and have that be the extent of what I would do. What is often another source of rage are the adults that never stopped the treatment and even encouraged it. Mr. Gym Teacher, why did you always have us choose sides for whatever game we were playing?
To all the young people here who are going through this, I wish I could take on your pain and spare you the experience I went through. I wish I could help more than by posting a message. Don't focus on revenge--come here and vent to us!

I think that if you let yourself hate them, you've let them win. Hating them gives them too much credit, really.

But... I really don't think I'm capable of hate. So I don't know what it's like to want to hate people. I can't even hate my stepfather, and he used to beat me up. Maybe it's different if it's more in your nature to get really angry at people.

have been severely bullied entire life but never felt hate for someone until was acutely cyber bullied long term by a sock puppeting now thankfuly banned regular member here.
it is why am sectioned now and feel a sht lot of hate for this person,was deliberately targeted due to being an easy shot who didnt realise what was going on.

he clearly has a mental illness to do things that he did but have still got no care for his survival and wish he had similar things done to him so he can see what its like.

PS: This isn't written to the OP, this is for some of the others who have written here.

That bitterness and hatred some of you possess is not healthy.. It's a very bad way to deal with things, and it only harms more than it aids you. Be careful so that you don't allow that mindset develop/evolve too far. It can be a dangerous path - For yourself and for others.
It can be difficult in some circumstances, but the best solution is generally to let go of that hate / anger and try to move on with your life without allowing those bad memories to devour your existence as a person. To proceed on that hatred towards people who hurt you in the past, only steals time and energy from you and your life that you could rather be spending focusing on other more sensible and positive things. Consider yourself a building - What you are doing is to "disassemble" stop the construction, instead of continue to build further upon yourself and your lives.
The longer you delay and the longer time you spend building further and making improvement, the greater the damage will become and the harder they will be to fix.

If you are that bitter and are struggling so much to get over these past memories, you should consider going to therapy/ see a shrink.

For your own sake, try to deal with these feelings. I wish you all well.

i was often ridiculed for my behavior when i was at regular schools, but i did not mind. i had no interest in their thought patterns.
if anyone became brash enough to challenge me in a bullying way, i looked into their eyes (which i never do otherwise) and they saw that i would seriously try to hurt them if they caused me grief, so they stayed away.
people are not as powerful as they think they are.

Last edited by b9 on 01 Dec 2013, 11:30 pm, edited 2 times in total.

bold bit - that's bullying too.



The trouble is that there are socially acceptable forms of bullying - the world of NTs is built on hypocrisy. When your boss makes fun of you or blames you for his/her mistakes - you smile and nod and agree with him/her about what a fool and an idiot you are being. Sure, you can try and complain and some people do. It always ends up costing them even more as then they get labelled as trouble makers.
Is it wrong = yes; is it possible to fight it = yes; but society is a complex beast and what seems fair to goose may not seem fair to gander.
I'm not even sure that a genuinely fair society is possible. For each person whose personal needs you take measures to protect, you have another person whose personal needs you have disregarded instead.

no it is not. it is just stating that you can protect youself
people are not very smart and they can be countered easily.

I just try to never think about them. Y'know, I don't like dwelling on things that went wrong in my life. I don't like them and I don't like to think about them.

Leafplant, but then the employee gets back at the boss in indirect ways that can't be blamed, so justice is done in the end, isn't it?

Than what?

Seriously hurting someone is not self protection. If you are genuinely prepared to follow through on your "eye threat" that is counter-bullying. Don't pretend it isn't. I am not saying you are not entitled to do it but don't be like every other hypocrite out there please.

I wouldn't call that justice.

What's also interesting is people have their own perception on what bullying is. I have seen the hypocrisy at Babycenter and parents there who are against bullying all of a sudden bully a member there and don't find what they are doing as bullying. They think the person deserved it whatever question they posted and they got so butt hurt by it they decide to bully the person and I didn't see any reason to be offended by the question so they were just being too sensitive and they sure make sensitive people look bad and make them look like bullies. Of course these bullies will say they are not bullying the OP. But yet they will talk about how awful bullying is and how it should be stopped when they have done pot kettle black. It's like people try and split hairs with the word and decide something they do isn't bullying just so they won't be a bully and then decide what is bullying and then they do it themselves and decide it's not bullying because of X and Y. That would be like me deciding to bully someone just because they are fat and ugly and then call it not bullying because the person shouldn't be out in public because they look so gross. That is what it looked like to me what those women were doing on Babycenter.

I once asked my husband what does he think bullying is and he said "Getting beaten up" and I said that's part of it but teasing is also a form of bullying and so is ignoring you and avoiding you but it all depends. There is different levels of it. Because my husband didn't get beaten up, he said he was never bullied, only teased and ignored and being avoided.

So I can buy the fact that a bully wouldn't even know they are being a bully even if they are aware of what they are doing. Plus bullying has become a vague term now because people call anything bullying that isn't even bullying and that is real insulting to people who have actually been bullied.

There there are lot of people who think bullying is okay in some situations but won't consider it bullying. I can think of one example of a banned member who was on another forum and she was very vile and always did insults and attacked people and always did false accusations and seemed like like blaming people for anything and she would go from nice to mean and she was wishy washy and ignoring her always mad eher act worse so finally we bullied her back on the forum and she left. We got so sick of her BS and meanness we started to ignore her in her thread and post random things and talk about other things and it ticked her off. Very few members actually trolled her there and I couldn't even careless. I always find it funny when bullies get bullied by their victims. I used to piss mine off by doing the Beth germ thing because they would always say "blackout" and go "Uh oh Beth germs" and cross their fingers so I started to touch them just to piss them off to give them my germs or chase after them so it's not anything new when I decide to do the opposite to people who are not being nice to me just to annoy them. Then thank goodness they stopped with the Beth germ crap by the time I was in fourth or fifth grade and I didn't even have to touch them anymore to make them have my germs and turning it all into a game.

An example of how everyone had their own perception on bullying. One person is a bully but doesn't see what they are doing as bullying.

I am sure that would mean one of my aspie friends has fantasies about being a bully because he is always talking about blackmailing and stuff to do to people who gave him trouble and he claims eh doesn't hold grudges but I told him if he is fantasizing about destroying their lives and blackmailing and getting back at them, that is holding a grudge and he hasn't moved on or else he wouldn't be having these thoughts.

one of mine hanged himself recently I laughed.