Can't handle

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I'm 18 and was diagnosed two years ago. I can't deal with this horrendous condition! It is basically ruining my life and not letting me prosper. I feel, infact I know I have a tonne of potential but the condition is holding me back.

I have basically no friends and I am constantly lonely. I act really immature sometimes for attention because I am that bad. I feel like I am starting to get really clingy and do some stupid things for attention! I am smart and don't want to turn daft. I am finished my A levels and taking a year out and Its the worst decision i've made. I haven't a clue what i'll do and I didn't think it out.

The lack of friendships has made me question myself, i'm quite insecure and not confident. I feel like everyone dislikes me and that i'm ugly or something. I am embaressed to speak up because I think that everyone will laugh at me. I can't look at people and people find me awkward. People try but just give up.

What is so bad is that I look and act normal. No one would realise that I have this.

The truth is that I artificially made myself think that people had an interest me but in reality not one person could give a crap which is so sad.

I am wondering what I have done wrong. I use Twitter to rant which would feel embaressing aswell. No one comments and I am feeling like i'm making it all awkward for me. Again. Its all a rediculous amount of stuff for an 18 year old to handle. I am at bursting area now! Everyday I am moody and I constantly overthink everything - my sleeping pattern is a disaster!
I don't know how to cope with this anymore. I just want a normal life. All I can think of doing right now is crying but I cannot because i'm just so cold and hard.

Please help.

Thanks. Owen

I can help by sharing the same thing with you that I have with the rest of this forum for several months now. Click the link in my signature and have a read. It's long & a bit rough, but essentially it's my story and what I've done via diet & herbal treatments to tremendously reduce my symptoms and get back to life. If it works for you as it has me, you'll be a lot further ahead by the time you're my age than I'm at now. Feel free to pm if you like.

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No for supporting trump. Because doing so is deplorable.

I get the feel's being somebody who is 17 and just finished AS levels (moving on to A) and clueless of what to do after. However I was diagnosed allot earlier than you (at like 4) but to me anyway It dose not make all the worlds difference, I'm currently trying very hard to work on what I want to achieve and all I can really say is that try to do what makes you happy I know its tough and it has been for me and trust me I still have a way to go but I hope it gets better for you *hugs*.

I'd highly recommend working with a therapist on cognitive behaviour therapy (CBT).

It's a type of therapy used with adult autistic patients as well as adult NT patients. It gets you thinking about how you react in certain situations and training yourself to react in a manner that is more healthy and positive. So, the therapist helps you to understand how you react when situation Y occurs. Then, they discuss with you whether you think if your reaction makes you feel good and think about how you would prefer to react. Then, the next few times you're in situation Y you purposefully stop and think "I'm not going to react they way I used to, I'm going to react the way I want to". Over time, your new way to react becomes the way you naturally react, thus leading to behaviour that makes you feel better not worse.

A quick example would be "when that jerk comes up to me again to tease me I'm just going to laugh, smile, walk away and know in my heart they're the problem, not me".

I've had a fair bit of CBT over the years and it's really helped me to live better in an NT world and to not feel so bad about myself.

I'm sure your school could set up up with a counsellor familiar with CBT. It's a fairly common therapy technique and has good success with aspies.