Is this wrong?

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Across the street, there is a guy with classic autism who lives with his mom. I go over to play video games with him sometimes; he has a LOT of games

Anyway, one of his special interests is baby characters from various cartoons, and he also likes putting diapers on his stuffed animals, to make them look more like babies I suppose.

But his mom is very adamant about not giving him diapers. I think it's because of what others might think if they saw an adult behaving this way.

He is always asking me if I can stop by PetCo to get him some dog diapers, and he tells me, "But make sure you don't tell your grandparents or my mom, they will just take them."

I told him I don't have much money right now (which is true), but I still feel a bit bad about it. I just don't want to get in trouble with my grandparents (I never would have imagined buying diapers could get me in trouble...)

So it makes it hard to talk to him sometimes because he is always asking if I can get those diapers for him yet. But I just don't see why his mom is so against it. We live in a pretty rural area, and he never really leaves their property, so it's not like people thinking badly of them is even an issue.

Absolutely nothing wrong with this

Maybe you could talk to his mom about it when he is not around sometime, and see if she could change her idea about it since it seems like a harmless thing that makes him happy. Or maybe there is something you don't know about this interest of his that is why she is against it. When he asks you, just keep telling him it is not something you can help him with and try to get him thinking about or doing something else.

Reminds me of my other aspie brother who still played with lego and powerranger / turtle figures when he was 16. If you dont really bother anyone with it in public, who cares if you play with the stuff you like in your own room?

Maybe his parents think it is embarassing and dont want anyone to find out.

Because NT's are basically pack animals, anything outside the ordinary is considered unacceptable because society would not approve. There's no harm in what your friend is doing but society wouldn't accept an adult doing such things, even if they're done in private. It's a potential social embarrassment which must be avoided at all costs.

No its not wrong
This reminds me lol I play with legos sometimes and toys or pencils imagining them as characters or pther stationaries for making them the cars,furniture, etc. or sometimes forks and spoons or anything I find

Another thought:
Buying your friend diapers could cause problems if you're found out - maybe even get you banned from the house which would be sad for both of you. Because you didn't actually say no to buying the diapers your friend is still expecting you to get them when you can afford it. Can you explain to him the situation that this will put you in?

I can't find anything wrong with putting diapers on stuffed animals.

I agree with everything posted thus far and think this is a harmless obsession. It's probably essential that you ask the mom about it because one way or another she will see the new diapers and wonder where they came from.

One thing that might explain his mom's behavior is maybe he "uses up" the diapers in some way. Either getting them wet in pretend play or something less pleasant - one can imagine a lot of possibilities.
If they were being "used up", that could get to be a very expensive habit for the mom or the friend or whoever he was able to talk into getting them for him. Best to say you can not do it because you might get into trouble and then you would no longer be a welcome guest. Hopefully he will understand that this won't be good for either of you.

It's not really a question of right or wrong. But do you really want to spend your money buying diapers for him? He may not understand how expensive this habit could be. And there is probably a reason why his mom doesn't want him to have them.

There's nothing wrong with it as an interest or obsession, but it is something you either need to discuss with his mom, or be honest with him about. Before you go to his mom, make sure you talk to him first, so he doesn't feel as if his trust has been betrayed (since he specifically asked you not to tell her). Simply tell him that either you have to talk to her about what he wants, then maybe you can help, or there's nothing you can do. Be clear about explaining why, so he doesn't just think you're being mean. Situations like this can be tough. I wish people didn't have such a stigma against this sort of thing.

I know there isn't anything wrong with what he is doing, I just don't understand why they would care so much that they would disallow him from it.

I hadn't thought of that, I don't really know if he uses them up. I suppose it's a possibility. But he does have a few already I'm pretty sure, it seems to me he just keeps them.

But from the way my grandparents told me about it the first time he invited me over, they made it sound like it was because his mom just doesn't like it because it is strange. They described it as a "fetish" the first time they told me about it, and then told me something to the effect of, "If he asks you to get diapers for him, don't. His mom wants him to stop putting them on his animals."

It sounds to me like his mom just thinks it is too strange to be allowed, which, if that is the reason, I don't really think it's fair. But to be honest there isn't much I can do about it. I mean, first of all, they'd probably just say it's none of my business, and I don't want to get in trouble for being "disrespectful to my elders". Plus, even if they didn't dismiss me immediately, I just don't think they would listen to me. They would be very condescending and not even consider what I'm saying, and it would only cause me to become extremely frustrated.

So I guess my only real option is to just tell him why I can't get them for him. I'm sure he won't be mad at me for it or anything, but I still feel like it isn't really fair.

I bet the reason is like beady said, he may be doing something messy with them so he can pretend he is changing real messy diapers. Or else he is pretending they are messy and just throwing away dry ones. Otherwise he wouldn't keep needing more diapers. Either way, it's very wasteful and expensive.

What about using cloth diapers? Any white piece of cloth he could tie on the animals would work.

If I were a parent, and had a kid who did that I wouldnt encourage it either.

But I would probably change my mind if the autistic kid capitalized on his obsession by getting a job in a nursing home and getting paid union wages to change real diapers on real people.

But all of that aside...

Its not the OP's place to judge either the kid, OR to judge the parents/grandparents being judgmental about the kid. And there might be some good reason that you know about for them forbidding him to do it. And apparently he doesnt even offer to pay for them by giving you money for the diapers. So there is no reason for the OP to be the guy's "enabler"- even if it is a harmless habit.

I'm not saying I'm going to buy them for him, or even that they should. I'm just confused about it, they seem overly concerned about it, like they think it is bad.

I could be wrong, they could have reasons other than just thinking it is weird. To be honest I really don't know, that's just the impression I have gotten from them.

Like I said, that could be why, but the way they explained it to me it, it sounds like it's just because they think it's weird, they never said anything else about it. I think he has some which he just keeps. I do know she doesn't buy him any, but I have always seen a couple, so unless he has a ton I don't think he's using them, at least not those ones. I don't know if he would with more.

Assuming he was not going to use them up, I just don't see why they'd care. If he does use them then that's understandable. Honestly I don't really know, so I'm just speculating at this point. When I initially made this post the thought that he could be using them hadn't even crossed my mind, otherwise I probably would have tried to figure that out first.