Did you feel you picked your special intrests?

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I always felt as if my special interest picked me or someone picked them out for me. Yes, I always liked my special interests but I never made the conscious decision on what I got interested in. I always figured this is what people meant when they say "God calls you to do X". I'm not complaining or anything, I'm just wondering if other autistic people did choose their special interests.

I did not deliberately choose any of my life long enthusiasms, they simply attracted me super strongly when I first learned of them and I wanted to learn more. So maybe they did choose me.

I like what I like. I have no control over it.
But I like them, and I like liking them, so I don't mind not being in control.

They've never felt like I chose them. It's not like choosing a shirt where I think "I want a shirt" and then go and pick one. It's more like "That's interesting" and then after a while I realise I've spent a long time absorbed in the thing. I'm usually surprised how long they last and how much they take my life over.

But special interests don't pick me. That would be absurd. It would be unusual if somebody else picked a special interest for me. In fact with music, when I first started out with it I wasn't even encouraged to continue. As for God, it would be a very strange deity that wanted me to mess about with some of the special interests I've had. But I know what you mean.

Anyway, I think I'd be quite miserable without them.

Certainly have, my special interest is YOUTUBE podcasting.

I advised my doctors that my memory only works for things that interest me...

...and I don't get to choose what interests me.

Nope. Most of my interests were either just full-on sugar for my neurotype (hugely true with music and art), for things like martial arts, cigars, hiking, and that sort of thing that was more derivative but I saw angles within them that scratched the same itch (for example - really good, complex cigars have a lot in common with music taken in through a different sense).

For philosophy and chasing big 'meaning' questions though - that seems to happen easily for anyone whose both naturally curious and living skew to the general population and carrying an unusual burden (autistic, LGBTQ, physically disabled, etc.).

I feel that I pick my special interests. I feel inspired to choose better interests after watching videos on mindfulness.

Not really.
I used to think NASCAR was dumb, but slowly being exposed to it caused an interest to develop.
I hardly play video games and yet I find gaming incredibly interesting.
Kraft Dinner boxes used to have hockey cards on them, apparently I'm a sucker for collectibles.

Not picked on. But you do hafta keep in mind "whats cool" to talk about, and what not. And you hafta tolerate other people's ignorance on topics even if they dont tolerate yours.

For example when I was a gradeschool kid I was into animals. Reading books about them. Knew which mammals are related to which etc.

Out grew it but still have all of that knowledge in my head. So as an adult in my thirties I would mention that if we hike this local trail you might see beavers...I have to tolerate the other person saying "are they dangerous?", and NOT blurt "YES... beavers are all man eaters...you dumbcluck! Everyone knows that beavers are buck toothed rodents that only eat plants, and cant eat people, and that they are not carnivores like cougars or wolves...even if they are kinda big". Because NOT everyone knows that.