How many female auties/aspies talk too much?

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Women: In social situations do you talk too much or too little?
I talk too little (social anxiety). 59%  59%  [ 19 ]
I talk an appropriate amount. 13%  13%  [ 4 ]
I talk too much. 19%  19%  [ 6 ]
I talk way way waaaaaaaaaaay too much. 9%  9%  [ 3 ]
Total votes : 32

Lumi
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26 Apr 2018, 3:02 pm

From when I was little and a teenager, I definitely spoke too much at home (when in the mood). I had a fair amount of difficulty with being understood by others when saying sentences and I spent more of my time alone, content. This led to most of the talking and asking questions to one parent for awhile (as an only child and I did not know how to be interested in other kids, though I did have a friend here and there). Over time, I learned to not be so impulsive and break up times when I wanted to talk, instead of non-stop.


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cortex88
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26 Apr 2018, 5:26 pm

Funny and cute poll.

Makes me think of my female programmer collegue. When she talks, she talks a lot. But she can be very selective about her subjects.

I don’t think there is a difference between men and women here when considering autism. You just love to talk about your interests, period.



Unic0rn99
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27 Apr 2018, 11:28 am

Was wondering as I’m new here, how do you make a poll? Thank you.



Hypercoaster
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30 Apr 2018, 4:57 am

I have always been highly verbal. I will talk and talk and talk if given the chance. I'm a rambler when it comes to my special interests. I picked the option "I talk too much" rather than the most extreme option, because my mom taught me how to recognize people getting bored of me. So, I will be self-conscious if I start rambling on, afraid that I am crossing the line, so to speak.



9BillionNamesofGod
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30 Apr 2018, 9:43 am

I think I have a moderate to serious case of graphomania. I don't talk much at all - used to be very shy and quiet as a child/teen, now I would say I talk appropriate amount most of the times.

However, I have been keeping a journal since I was very young (maybe 8-9), have several blogs, write stories that I post online, and have several notebooks where I write down my ideas and random information I find interesting. I also make lists (words and expressions I like) and tend to hold onto all these, have some lists and papers from like 10-15 years ago; of course I kept all my journals as well.

So in my case writing is clearly instead of expressing myself in speech, although as I said I talk in social situations nearly the same amount as NTs. I just find it impossible to talk enough about my interests because people are usually not interested to the degree I am, or they don't know much about the topic.


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kraftiekortie
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30 Apr 2018, 9:46 am

I'm a male who sometimes talks too much LOL



hobojungle
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30 Apr 2018, 1:01 pm

9BillionNamesofGod wrote:
So in my case writing is clearly instead of expressing myself in speech,


Writing & drawing for me. I talk too little. I used to be less accepting of it than I am now.



starrybird
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01 May 2018, 12:00 am

I don't talk that much. Just don't feel connected with the idiots I'm surrounded with. I prefer talking to my online groups or simply talking to myself. Even that's more interesting than interacting with my classmates.



Goth Fairy
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01 May 2018, 1:10 am

I ticked the first option but, like some others, it is not due to social anxiety. Sometimes I just can't get a word in, especially if it's more than one person. Other times I can't think of what to say, or if I do think of something I don't know how to say it. Sometimes I have too many thoughts and I don't know which to say first. Often while I'm thinking about what to say, someone else starts talking and I've missed my chance.

Sometimes I do get stressed and then I just can't get the words out even when they are in my head. I remember being told off by a teacher at school and just feeling so overwhelmed with emotions that I even though I was screaming at her in my head I just stood there silently, unable to do more than nod.


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Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 149 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 73 of 200
You are very likely neurodiverse (Aspie)


Kinme
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13 May 2018, 7:19 am

If I could, I would remain silent. I've started regulating conversations and group work in my courses lately. Trying to force myself to do things I would never have done in the past.



Arganger
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13 May 2018, 8:07 am

I don't know how to answer. When stressed speaking becomes very hard, but when I'm not that stressed I've been known to perseverate for hours at a time, wearing out the most dedicated of listeners.

So I fall under two, very different, answers.


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DroseRose
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13 May 2018, 8:48 am

Once I started speaking (as a small child I've talked loads - to the extent that my mum once threatened me that if I didn't stop speaking for a minute she would treat me to a giant ice cream.
I used to speak even more when nervous and when meeting new people. Many of my now best friends at first found me quite annoying because I talked so much.
I also think I've managed to get people interested because I've always been passionate about subjects I spoke about.
In recent years I've become more aware of finding a more natural rhythm in conversations - both by intentionally putting in pauses - and by training myself to listen more to the person I'm speaking with.
I am now so lucky as to work in a field where my deepest interest - human connection and communication and promoting conditions for it to happen in a meaningful way - is my job, which means I teach and train and actually do get to speak about my favourite subject for extended periods of time.

Only recently have I realized how much effort I put into "not talking too much". It doesn't make me want to not care, as conversations are now probably more reciprocal, but there may be some being real and immediate that I used to do more, when I wasn't that aware of it.

On the gender issue: I think way too many women, autie/aspie or not, are taught that they talk too much when, in reality, they should be allowed to explore strong and confident and proud talking way more - and enjoy being able to express themselves. I do thing gender stereotypes are very oppressive when it comes to our idea of how much particular people should speak.



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