What have you been mistaken for?

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Mistaken for disruptive at school, well, not really mistaken, I mean I was a bit, talking at the back of the class, not paying attention, but it wasn't due to being naughty, it was more that I was bored and insufficiently challenged.

Mistaken for being "rude, abrupt, and abrasive," which really hurt, still gets to me, when I was just pointing stuff out that I was actually right about.

I've also variously been mistaken for being my daughter's sister (because I look a lot younger than I actually am, and that's related to being Aspie), and also mistaken for being French, Italian, Spanish and also Jewish (if I'm in continental Europe, I often get the locals just waffling on to me in Spanish or Italian and expecting me to understand, I guess I have brown hair, brown eyes and don't have totally fair skin), and I lived in a suburb of my hometown where there are a lot Jewish people, and again maybe because I have brown hair and brown eyes, I used to get asked that a lot.

Shy
Some kind of a genius
ret*d (Anyone who's ever spoken to me for more than 10 seconds says that I come across as very smart, so I'm guessing that there is something in my body language that looks "ret*d".)
Stupid
On drugs
Mute
Psychotic

I have to wonder about that "ret*d body language" thing. It's the damndest thing. One time I just walked out of a test in a pretty advanced subject and since I have other disabilities besides AS (agraphia, for one), I take the tests in a separate room from the other students.

So there I am walking away from this terrifically advanced test and I walk to go out the building and I realize I'm walking out the wrong exit and some lady corrects me after I've already turned but...

The WAY she corrects me...

It's a mistake that any NT could have made but she talked to me like I was...

Well. I'll just say a very small child. It's not like there was a huge sign saying DONT GO OUT THIS DOOR! with police tape across it. It was just the emergency exit.

yeah I get the gay thing alot just because I am not out chasing tail. I although I am interested in women, I just dont have to social skills I guess. People think I am weird because I would rather just be left alone.

I've been mistaken for....

At school, a drug taker, even though I didn't know what drugs were at that age.

Someone wanted for a violent assault and robbery on an 80 year old lady (the suspect was 6 inches taller than me, about 50 pounds heavier and of a different skin colour, but that didn't stop the police taking me in for questioning because I "looked guilty").

An undercover cop spying on my friends. I never quite managed to fit in.

A stupid idiot- quite regularly by people who place far too much emphasis on appearances

A gifted intellectual - occasionally by people who place a different emphasis on appearances.

Gay - occasionally when young. Not since getting married and having children. Although I do have an aunt who is convinced that I had kids to hide my obvious gayness'. She even suspects that my children cannot possibly be mine because of that obvious gayness.

Finally, I've been mistaken several times for something unpleasant that you wipe off your shoe with contempt.

Drug addict. I've never done drugs
Shy. I'm not, I just don't have nothing to say.
Some kind of a genius. I'm not, or I should have a better job, lol

eccentric
super brain
difficult and volatile
reclusive
too sensitive
too insensitive
blunt
insecure
loner
gay
truly weird
strange
too intense
troubled
nutter
the list goes on....

NT, spolied, meltdowns as being part of my personality, 16-years-old.

Here's another one I just remembered:


Dickhead

Stupid
Hopeless Daydreamer
Rude
A Geek
Mature
Immature
Sensitive
Insensitive
Unfriendly
An anomaly
Miserable
Cheerful
Wise
Foolish
Self Aware
Posh
Focussed
Intense
Friendly
Intelligent
Wonderful
Helpful
Class Mentor
Trouble maker
Strange
Imaginative
Selfish
Generous
Quiet
A gem
Incompetent
Genius
Naive
Unreasonable
The Oracle
Brilliant
A Star
Hilarious
Determined
Shy
The Hermit in comfortable clothes
"You're not my mother."
Cold
Insensitive
Caring and understanding
Fantastic listener
Lazy (for not being able to get into groups for group-work)
Robot-girl
Clumsy
Good at sports/physically fit

Funny how some of these terms seem to contradict each other.
No wonder why I've been so confused all my life!
What do people want really want from me?

Shy
Snobbish
Psycho
Gay
Stoned
Oversensitive
Selfish
Immature

"Something's wrong with you but I can't my finger on it." *scowl*

Charming
Annoying
Penny Crayon

The list goes on...

In former times I was mistaken...


...at school for:

Lazy, difficult to work with, "need to have your head examined", just plain nuts, learning disabled (by kids and teachers as well).


...in my family for:

Autistic (by the oldest of my brothers)
willfully annoying, willfully strange (maybe she'll stop if we stop giving her attention)(by my mother in her worst days)
motionless (not having a personality) I didn't care for other people, spoiled, (by all family)
miserable, snobbish, arrogant, immature (by my father who used to call me a "stupid peace of sh*t)


..by people in general for:

Eccentric, weird, selfish, brat, impolite, stupid, as*hole, ret*d, rude, selfish, bad attitude, troublemaker by will, mentally ill/disabled, schizophrenic, psycho, psychopath, sick b***h, split personality, crazy/serious mental issues, difficult, volatile.

My obsessions were mistaken for:

"ticks", "spleens" (by people in general)
"silly ideas" (by my granny)


Nowadays I'm sometimes mistaken for younger than I am and for a foreigner because I speak German in mixed dialects and use words I made up.


What I really am, and there's nothing wrong with it:

Introverted, allof, extremely thorough, detail-oriented, alittle shy.

My behavior models are very altruistic and perfectionist, so people assume I'm sweet, kind and a tool to push around and use. Then, when I ignore them and don't do what they want, they seem to assume I'm just dense or stupid, like a dumb sexy woman, so they sometimes get arrogant and mean.

Then I have a meltdown if they don't back off. They seem horrified and shocked when I transform from a decorative, asian, graceful and accommodating woman into some infuriated hard-ass. I think Western men have some fantasy that Asian-looking women are docile sex toys who can be traded and exploited.

I told my professor and his colleagues, that they had no right to force their narcissistic, sociopathic, slu*ty trashy Craigslist slut on me and that it was simply unnecessary for them to let her harass and bully me in order to get laid because she was doing everyone anyways. I've told them that I think they're corrupt, perverted jerks and sexually desperate losers.

Then they act traumatized and horrified, like I'm going to go shoot up the campus or something, because of the shocking transformation when I meltdown. Miss socially-naive, graceful, Asian love doll turns into verbal Jack the Ripper when she melts down when stalked or harassed. Seriously, I think they s**t their pants. I hope they did.

I want to eliminate my projection of being a graceful, humble and sweet woman into being a hard-ass b***h so these misperceptions about me will not keep occurring. I AM truly nice, but when I don't want people in my face and people in my space, who are harassing me, I will meltdown if they force themselves on me and I can't set boundaries against them.

I want to project a persona of being an insensitive, mean b***h who will backhand anyone who irritates me, than keep getting misperceived.

Gay, on drugs, weird, a sadistic killer (someone started a rumour in high school about that, on the bright side, people left me alone), an obsessive WoW player, and as having ODD. All of the previous are false.

Lazy, slow thinking, childish, naive, "fallen from Moon", absent minded, "sleeping with open eyes"... and I often heard "You are intelligent person, so why are you still behaving like stupid little kid?"

_________________
Castaway on Earth.
Excuse my English, please. My real name is H*Y*M*A*N K*A*P*L*A*N