Should I really change?

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Should I really change and make people like me as a normal person?

What are you asking? If you are asking if you should become as normal as possible, I would answer no. If that is what you're asking, the reason I say no is, you are who you are, you might want to learn how to act better with NT people, so to better be in those situations. However, you should never change the core of who you are just to be like someone you are not. It is better to learn who you are and work with your strengths and weaknesses, then to try and become someone else to eliminate your weaknesses.

No, I think you should make them like you for who you are, otherwise what's the point?
The key word here is of course 'make'. Think about it. Can you really 'make' people do anything they don't want to do.
Look at your original question and then rephrase it.

Should you try to adapt to certain situations that have certain social codes? Yes, at least to an extent, if you have a real desire to be seen as 'normal' among your peers by their standard of normaility.

Should you attempt change who you are, at core? No. Of course not. That would be ludicrous.

"Be yourself; everyone else is already taken." ~ Oscar Wilde

Only you can make that decision.


There are some things we have to change about ourselves to make people happy or to get people to like us or to accept us and that is everybody.
There were things I had to change about me to narrow down the list of "Reasons to bully me" and to get people to like me by learning how to be nicer and care more about people and think of them, not have it always be about me and do everything I wanna do but I never do the same thing in return for them. I felt better about myself and happier because I liked being a good person. I also had to learn how to not talk about my obsessions all the time or else people won't want me around.

You only do what you are comfortable with, don't change for anyone else.. if there is something about yourself that you want to work on, and if you can change it, then you should focus on that. Remember, don't please anyone else but yourself.

i wanted to change and tried to but now i dont. dont be fooled into thinking you have to change to be liked, people will like you for who you are

Can you just do that?

When I was a kid I thought the difference was imaginary.
When I finally decided to push the "change" button I found out I had to hold it down forever.

There is a guy on this web site who is trying to make other people like him as an abnomal person by exposing every damn freaky thing about him in front of his 500 internet friends. You ve gotta keep an eye on him to check if that works. If it does - then, sure, why change?

I repress my AS, as much as humanly possible, and I am glad I do

Same here.
The only thing which I am not trying to change - is I do not trying to enjoy things which other's enjoy, and which I know - are not a pleasure for me. It is good to figure that out. Because there are stereotypes that you should enjoy this and that - just like the majority of people do. For instance I do not like big and noisy parties, art galleries, .. So, I just do not do that "for my personal pleasure" . If I do that - then it is when I know that I have to.

I would rather fight my way up stream than follow a crowd just for the hell of following a crowd. I have my own path, and I follow it diligently.

yeah but no one (in a lot of instances) wants an individual
not how life works
I do all sorts of stuff I don't like
most of what I do I don't enjoy
I don't have obsessions like most aspies

I said I do things when I have to. But it is good to know what you really enjoy and what not. Because when I was 20 i thought that if I am not partying each week-end - then this is the time lost and killed. Even though I did not atually enjoyed it. I THOUGHT that I enjoyed it, because others did.

You can't make people like you, anyway. Even if you were completely and totally normal you couldn't.

Anyway, you can't become completely normal... you're past early infancy, and past that nobody can change a brain at such a fundamental level. Changes are possible; learning is possible; NT is not.

What is possible? Well, I think there's something you were meant to do; something you're uniquely suited for; and that's possible. A fulfilling life is possible. So are friends. So is, if you want it, marriage--though probably at a later age than most people, if you're anything like the average autistic person. Some things will be harder than they are for most people, obviously, but not impossible.

Remember that there is a middle ground between completely dedicating yourself to normality and completely refusing to learn anything new. Either one is a bad thing, but somewhere in the middle is just enough effort to communicate, and not so much that you lose your identity or burn out trying to do what's not just impossible but inadvisable.