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Silver_Meteor
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06 Jan 2009, 11:53 pm

Do you think it's possible for someone who has Asperger's Syndrome to have a personality that NTs in general are attracted to?


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ForsakenEagle
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07 Jan 2009, 12:09 am

All of the time. The only real bummer is that most do not want to see past what they see on the outside to find what they are looking for. :)



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07 Jan 2009, 12:21 am

I think it depends on what the specific Aspie's symptoms are. In my case, most of my trouble seems to be in the relating aspect, so no, not possible.


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sunshower
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07 Jan 2009, 12:30 am

Highly possible.


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Fnord
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07 Jan 2009, 12:33 am

I've been told that "lots" of people like me, but I just don't see it. Most of the people I meet seem indifferent, if not outright hostile to me.


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pensieve
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07 Jan 2009, 12:34 am

There are some Aspie traits that NT's like: honesty, creativeness, individualism.

I know people have liked me because I am am me and try to be nobody else. I don't even know how to do that. I'm still confused at why one guy thought I was less fake than other girls.
People think I'm talented and I hardly ever start arguments because I hate conflict, so they like being around me.

I'm kind of like Greentea too - I do have problems relating with people too.



07 Jan 2009, 12:43 am

People like my honesty, straightforwardness, sense of humor, they say I'm cute and funny.
This is what I got from men I met. But were they NT? I don't know. Lot of them had some problems such as emotional problems, shyness and seemed to show some aspieness. One of them was an aspie but I think I scared him off.



Yocritier
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07 Jan 2009, 5:04 am

I don't wish to sound arrogant, just mentioning some personal observations, girls do find me attractive and I'm tall at 6 feet. I do sports each week to keep fit. Also, my facial appearance is 'different', but in an attractive way. My wife and her friends agree. I now strongly believe AS has something to do with the way we look physically.

Unfortunately, when they really get to know me, the AS personally puts them off 8) I am like a huge firewall against mankind.



anna-banana
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07 Jan 2009, 9:25 am

I get a lot of respect from people for being straightforward and uncompromising and saying out loud what everyone is thinking. that seems to be a plus in school and work environments. but in normal social interactions it is a big turn-off, so I've been told.

:shrug:


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07 Jan 2009, 10:50 am

I read about this - aspie charisma they call it. People like my absurd sense of humour, and it gets me by in social situations. To me, the world is insane, but to people around me, I'm witty
:?


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07 Jan 2009, 11:02 am

Yes, I believe it is quite possible for NTs to be attracte to Aspies. Even though the Asperger diagnosis was not in place here in the United States in the 1980s, my wife-to-be (who is NT) was quite attracted to my eccentric ways (I have Asperger's). We dated seven years in the 1980s, and have now been married over nineteen years. We have two sons.



Padium
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07 Jan 2009, 11:02 am

I have been told by people that there are people that like me, unfortunatly I never see it, and when I ask them they don't want to tell me who... Worst part is, being odd socially really makes things harder for me. I always did want to find someone, and I feel I need to find someone, the problem for me is how.

EDIT: apparently I'm charismatic too, but I don't see how.



Igor
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07 Jan 2009, 11:43 am

I'm completely thrown by the whole relationship thing.

I've had friends in my time and I think I was generally liked. However, once I was outside of their radar (i.e. left school, job or university) I never heard from them again - not for me the life-long best friend. Even when I've contacted people (which I have done fairly often) they're quite non-committal, and again I'll only hear from them a couple of times.

When I left my last job, some of my staff even cried and they got together to buy a fantastic leaving present - part of the reason I left was because I had the impression that my staff didn't particularly like or appreciate me.

I have been called weird by people who didn't know me and even cute :eew: by those who did. I've always had more women as friends than men, but only ever had 1 girl friend.

I really don't get it at all.


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t0
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07 Jan 2009, 1:18 pm

Yocritier wrote:
I now strongly believe AS has something to do with the way we look physically.


Something as far as making us look different? Only comments I've received on looking different have to do with my eyes. People (women) think their color is very blue. I tend to think that AS shapes the way I look in that I have a mental image of myself and I make myself look to fit the image. The image changed dramatically when I was a teenager and again when I left college. I had an aunt who hadn't seen me in 10 years that didn't recognize me at a family gathering because my image had changed so dramatically.

I do find that NTs find me attractive when I step out of my usual routine and take charge of a situation. I've spent a number of years volunteering with an equestrian group as a worker and people thought of me as a nice, quiet guy. But when I managed an event and took charge of the first-day welcome meeting in an assertive fashion, some of the women at the event gave my wife compliments about me. I changed from the nice guy into the attractive nice guy.



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07 Jan 2009, 2:01 pm

Of course. :) NTs may find our "different way of thinking" useful and like that, (it's happened to me.)


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07 Jan 2009, 2:14 pm

A lot of people often get into whatever I'm into and copy what I do and what I like and stuff. There's even been people that have been obsessed with me! It's really sweet of them, but I get so annoyed from it after awhile. That has happened maybe five or six times now with people I know.