Ignored otherwise through out the year

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Hi:
I have some extended family members of mine who refuse to learn about the whole story behind Autism appear to treat me like I am a half of a person. They do this by ignoring me and appear to deny it that I am one of their family members. The only time I hear from them is during the holiday times which have now passed when we send each other cards with news letters. I even find that they ignore it when I attempt to acknowledge their things.

This time when I got a news letter it has a link to a blog on instagram of one of my cousins doing cooking for a hobby. I had decided to subscribe and follow her but she has not appeared to acknowledge my interest or say thank you for that matter.

Does anyone else in here have the same problem with family like that?

What happens when you call?

If my uncle answers he will talk to me but if my aunt as answered we are polite to each other for a few minutes before she rushes off the phone with an excuse.

If I even try and leave a message on their answering machine they refuse to return my calls period.

Ouch. The only positive here is your uncle, and you may want to maintain that. In regard to your aunt, you are probably going to go on hurting over her behaviour to you until you confront it. Every time she evades you, you are probably storing up more unexpressed feeling about this. Although it is hard, you are going to feel a whole lot better if you state to her what is happening - for example: "I notice that whenever I call, you don't talk for very long before making an excuse. Is there a particular reason for this?"

Probably, she will instantly go into denial mode instead of acknowledging her behaviour and the hurt it causes. However, the important thing is that you have named her behaviour and she has HEARD it. I don't think she will change her behaviour much if at all. From your perspective, don't store up the hurt and anger, just go on naming what is happening, even get in first: "I suppose you have to rush off now, I know you are so busy". By taking control of the situation, you take your own power back, if that makes sense.

I used to be close to their eldest daughter who is 7 years younger than I am. Then she hit puberty and has not been friendly since. I think a lot of it has to do with my aunt estranging her from me due to ridiculous stigmas about Autism next to hearing things being told behind my back by my parents. So I am constantly being ignored on social media. I would like to confront her and stamp out the stereotypes in her mind.

I don't want to be nasty because my aunt and two cousins are extremely fragile and had blocked me on facebook for calling them out before.

Being confident and beleiving in your strengths is a good thing. Don't lose that. But on the other hand, there is a difference between being assertive and being needlessly confrontational.

The best way to go about it might not be to say, "look here, you have to wrong attitude and we need to sort it out. We're family and that's important!" even though that is true, a better way might be to explain that you care about them and that you want them in your life and you feel sad that you don't see them as often as you would like to. Tell them you have good memories of them from childhood and that you valued your cousin's friendship and you feel that is too good to lose.

Dont' make them feel blamed because that will only get their hackles up and make them defensive it might make them feel like you don't like them and that will make them feel like you are trying to score points rather than be their friend. I hate to sound all mooshy, but the best way to open a door, more often that not, is to offer love rather than confronatation.

You catch more flies with honey than you do with vinegar.