Bipolar sufferer with a possible autistic two yr old

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Hi,
My name is Jolene, I am 34 yrs old and I suffer from Bipolar Disorder. I have three kids, ages 14, 11, and 2. My older two do not have any autistic tendencies, and although my youngest has a different father, I had no cause to believe she would be any different than my older two (well all kids are different, you know what I mean I just can't find the right words to explain it right now) She actually developed faster than her siblings in many ways, she started talking very early, but then she literally just STOPPED. Zia doesnt really say anything anymore, she will say a random word often but not in the right context and we never can get her to repeat it. Physically she seems normal, but when we talk to her, she doesnt comprehend our intent, like when we are upset with her, its no different to her than when we are joking with her. She is very routine oriented, because of my bipolar I am also so thats generally ok, but she doesnt tolerate any change, it upsets her for hours to days. Her height and weight are fine, they have always been luckily, and she used to try anything we ate, for the past few months though all we can get her to eat is: a cereal bar for breakfast, crackers or another cereal bar for lunch and snacks, and store bought chicken nuggets and apple sauce for dinner. She wont eat any other kind of chicken either, we have even tried making homemade chicken nuggets, she won't eat them.

We went to the doctor today and all these things as well as other things that I am forgetting right now are apparently symptoms of some type of Autism Spectrum Disorder. We are getting her tested, and she will definitely be getting some therapy regardless of what the tests say but I joined to try and learn all that I can.

Also, I feel INCREDIBLY guilty. When we learned I was pregnant, I immediately stopped all my meds, including my Paxil, which because of my Bipolar threw me into a downward spiral. I went to my doctor and asked what would be safe for both myself and the baby. They put me on Prozac, which now they are saying is unsafe. I didnt know. I did everything I could to keep her happy and healthy and now I find out I endangered her!

Anyway, maybe now that I wrote this all out I can read a bit about all of you. I welcome any comments, suggestions etc and I look forward to getting to know you all. Thanks in advance for any help you can give!
Jolene

Awwwe I don't think it's your fault at all. A lot of genetic research has been going into Autism and unfortunately where there are diseases like schizophrenia and BP in the family tree there is a higher chance of a child being born on the Autism spectrum. People with Autism also having a higher chance of having mentally ill offspring. The best thing you can do as mom you're already doing. You care greatly and your willing to fight for the resources she needs to develop and succeed in life. Just keep yourself healthy and a positive environment around her and I think that would help with her delays too. You also have to be careful about how the school system treats her. Sometimes a lot of neglect goes on towards ASD children's educations. That's mine and my mother's experience. You might also want to watch for symptoms of BP when she's an adolescence autistic women are fairly susceptible to developing BP. I have it too but I have negative symptoms and hypo mania so I don't find it too hard to manage. Anyway you shouldn't feel guilty I'm sure you'll make a great mom. Just remember to look after yourself as well as her.