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babybird
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28 Sep 2023, 1:57 pm

I have aspd traits and NPD traits. Therapy is teaching me a lot about myself because it's a safe environment for me to be completely open and frank about my wrong doings. My traits come from learned behaviour, physical, sexual, emotional abuse and neglect.

It's one of the most difficult things in my life to face upto the harm and hurt I have done to people and with no remorse but through therapy I am learning to see that I have done wrong.

I can't see how executing someone like me would do the world a favour to be honest. And why is it ok for you to say that about the likes of me but it's not OK for the likes of me to say that about you.


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28 Sep 2023, 4:03 pm

funeralxempire wrote:
bee33 wrote:
whereas someone with ASD is incapable of doing something which involves any degree of being manipulative


This is objectively incorrect, many of us have experienced or witnessed manipulative behaviour from other autistics.
When my girlfriend & her brother were growing up W would accuse Cass of not loving him if he wanted something from her that she wouldn't do or give & then she would give in because she'd feel bad. W still sometimes accuses Cass & their mom of not loving him when he cant get what he wants from them & blames them for making him angry, anxious, depressed ect. He also threatens suicide when they get really upset & frustrated with him & want to pull away.

I'll admit that I've been a bit manipulative with my mom so mom would feel bad & cook me special food I wanted & such things. I've also been a bit manipulative in my 1st relationship because Emily had problems with drugs & alcohol & I worried about her a lot & I wanted her to worry about me so she would realize what I was going through worrying about her. My manipulation was a bit more mild than suicide threats & accusing them of not loving me type things. Looking back I hated myself at the time & I currently hate the person I was that did that. That's not who I am now or at least NOT who I want to be. I guess I felt backed into a corner or stuck & I saw manipulation as my best or only way out.


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30 Sep 2023, 4:54 am

 ! magz wrote:
Several posts have been removed.
Wishing death to WP members cannot be allowed in this community.


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02 Oct 2023, 7:51 am

Comet Zed wrote:
The article overlooks some very fundamental differences in the development of ASD (a neuro-developmental condition) and NPD (trauma/abuse/attachment condition), as well as serious differences in how the similarities play out behaviourally.

Agreed. These are indeed very important differences.

Comet Zed wrote:
Anyone who has been on the receiving end of these behaviours from a textbook malignant narcissist will understand. These individuals will go out of their way to manipulate, coerce, intimidate and groom whoever they need to to get what they want, and they have an innate sense of both the social mechanics required to reach these ends and the vulnerabilities of those who stand in the way. Skills that people with ASD can only dream about.

Agreed, at least for the most part. Autistic people may be capable of some manipulation, but not to the degree that is apparently commonplace among people with NPD.


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02 Oct 2023, 8:39 am

believes the article was written by a psychopath / nacissitic disorder ..who is trying to reduce judgement of their own symptoms and spread the blame onto the Autism quotient to blurr the situation, i feel . They have presented mixed reasons, for Autism overlap ..Having grown up with my Asperger / Aspie symptoms .. Aspies do masking etc..
in order to survive.narcisstic people understand their mechanisms of action . Whereas masking for narcisstic people mask to disadvantage others .Aspies do not have enough spoons to deal with others judgenents and get physically drained doing it . The Narcisstic people get a thrill and might even brag on their actions to their other associates that might be more like them .
These comparisons by the Author are downright insulting and offensive.. Am thinking personally that either parts or all of this article needs to be retracted. Or at least amended..IMHO


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11 Oct 2023, 1:30 am

Jakki wrote:
believes the article was written by a psychopath / nacissitic disorder ..who is trying to reduce judgement of their own symptoms and spread the blame onto the Autism quotient to blurr the situation, i feel . They have presented mixed reasons, for Autism overlap ..Having grown up with my Asperger / Aspie symptoms .. Aspies do masking etc..
in order to survive.narcisstic people understand their mechanisms of action . Whereas masking for narcisstic people mask to disadvantage others .Aspies do not have enough spoons to deal with others judgenents and get physically drained doing it . The Narcisstic people get a thrill and might even brag on their actions to their other associates that might be more like them .
These comparisons by the Author are downright insulting and offensive.. Am thinking personally that either parts or all of this article needs to be retracted. Or at least amended..IMHO


Finding it disagreeable doesn't mean the author has an underhanded agenda or that the article ought to be retracted.

Odds are he's more educated on the topic than any of us are. Given the high rates of people with sociopathic traits who are doctors and police officers, it seems fair to conclude the condition doesn't inherently make people unable to try to make positive contributions to society.

Your counterpoint isn't informed by anything but assuming that he's attempting to harm us instead of recognizing similarities. You don't support that assumption and you don't provide any evidence that would support other conclusions. I don't mean to be rude, but you might as well say he's a big meanie-pants and I don't don't like him.


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11 Oct 2023, 9:26 am

funeralxempire wrote:
Jakki wrote:
believes the article was written by a psychopath / nacissitic disorder ..who is trying to reduce judgement of their own symptoms and spread the blame onto the Autism quotient to blurr the situation, i feel . They have presented mixed reasons, for Autism overlap ..Having grown up with my Asperger / Aspie symptoms .. Aspies do masking etc..
in order to survive.narcisstic people understand their mechanisms of action . Whereas masking for narcisstic people mask to disadvantage others .Aspies do not have enough spoons to deal with others judgenents and get physically drained doing it . The Narcisstic people get a thrill and might even brag on their actions to their other associates that might be more like them .
These comparisons by the Author are downright insulting and offensive.. Am thinking personally that either parts or all of this article needs to be retracted. Or at least amended..IMHO


Finding it disagreeable doesn't mean the author has an underhanded agenda or that the article ought to be retracted.

Odds are he's more educated on the topic than any of us are. Given the high rates of people with sociopathic traits who are doctors and police officers, it seems fair to conclude the condition doesn't inherently make people unable to try to make positive contributions to society.

Your counterpoint isn't informed by anything but assuming that he's attempting to harm us instead of recognizing similarities. You don't support that assumption and you don't provide any evidence that would support other conclusions. I don't mean to be rude, but you might as well say he's a big meanie-pants and I don't don't like him.


Education on a topic < (Repeated Personnal experience+ research+study..IMHO)

Okay ..yes , then I will say, he/she is a big meanie pants... :mrgreen:
But i do have extensive experiences with these type of personality types , both legally and in childhood growth circumstances.. And can and have over the years. Long before ,i understood that there were words to describe the repeated behaviours ,i have seen, done to others and myself throughout many years of my life .That were typical of certain people I have met . Does cause me to use severe words in reflecting on my experiences and knowledge of these people, that I have had to disengage with in order to preserve myself and maintain some degree of mental and physicsl safety . But have had to watch others whom were not as fortunate as me to recognise, unfortunate circumstances perpetrated upon unwitting people whom have no experience in these same circumstances.
Did Cause me to take several Psyche classes,one of them being abnormal Psychology classes in college.
So yes to qoute you :" And I dont like them"
Your approach to disqualifying my post, causes me to have my own misgiving about your less than compassionate response to my post .??.
If you have not experienced these type of personality types you might not wish to offer a opinion on my posts .
Less a certain lack of compassion might document you as a similiar personality type ?.IMHO?. hopefully not?
Judging by the contrast if your inquireys to my pm, vs this post you have made in response to my post on this thread. This situation might cause me to wonder if you might possibly have been a cause of others here getting banned.Directly or indirectly ??. IMHO. :roll: "Not intending to be Rude" Quoted to FuneralEmpire.


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11 Oct 2023, 9:34 am

Personal experience tends to be subject to confirmation bias. Do you have any research to provide that supports your stance?

I've experienced a lot of abuse from people, but I can't say for certain what the underlying cause was since I'm not a psychologist. Some people on this site have been diagnosed with NPD or narcissistic traits. It's not something that people can help, and they don't need to be stigmatized for it.

People get themselves banned. We are all responsible for our own behavior.


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11 Oct 2023, 11:01 am

TwilightPrincess wrote:
Personal experience tends to be subject to confirmation bias. Do you have any research to provide that supports your stance?

I've experienced a lot of abuse from people, but I can't say for certain what the underlying cause was since I'm not a psychologist. Some people on this site have been diagnosed with NPD or narcissistic traits. It's not something that people can help, and they don't need to be stigmatized for it.

People get themselves banned. We are all responsible for our own behavior.


Personnally have not met much in the way of dual diagnosis Autism and NPD .And my reference material has been long since left behind..As my college days were over 30 yrs ago.And a great deal of it was based on cross referencing things I learned in college then identified my own Personal experiences These individuals techniques / Personality assessments As being coincidental to Individuals ,I had come to know intimitely well. .. As written above my
experience is primarily synonymous with things that i had been taught in college. Due to time involved since my college days , And many moves involved , did not keep the books i had to buy for my psyche college classes .
And Precise titles of those books had not gotten into being strong enough valuable enough for me to wish to remember. Because ,i never thought at that , i would encounter such persons.Was still living at home then.
But if could convey experiences since to you ..Your understanding of my post might be expanded.
And I did agree with Funerals concept that because, i cannot adequate convey my experiences here and or give proper examples without flooding the site with Court Records and testimonies by myself and others that got documented over 15 yrs ago.And recalling them can be quite painful.
So apologies if my shared personal knowledge / experience, might not be adequate to present a satisfactory arguement to support , what you see here .
If you seem to question my experiences by using the phraseology regarding "confirmation bias"? then am concerned on what might be adequate for someone asking that kind of question??? 8O
All your doctors or anyone making any observations, might be subject to confirmation bias...! :ninja:
Topic of being banned;
If you do not consider that banging on someone experiences they share,might inadvertantly be a trigger to someone who has lived through unfavourable circumstances ( without having lived them yourself) . And if the triggered person starts a me,tdown, cause their mind starts reliving those things causing triggers you might accidentally enter them into a meltdown very gradually, as many Aspies do not or are not able to identify ,stuff starting their own meltdowns . And before you can grasp it.. they are writing from a PTSD meltdown POV . So things can get hot , and bad thoughts / words get exchanged, and NoOne gets any validation, and might argue the point,seeking that from another WP planet person . Then possibly their are not slowing down their thinking , to write adequately well to give others understanding .


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11 Oct 2023, 11:14 am

Jakki wrote:
TwilightPrincess wrote:
Personal experience tends to be subject to confirmation bias. Do you have any research to provide that supports your stance?

I've experienced a lot of abuse from people, but I can't say for certain what the underlying cause was since I'm not a psychologist. Some people on this site have been diagnosed with NPD or narcissistic traits. It's not something that people can help, and they don't need to be stigmatized for it.

People get themselves banned. We are all responsible for our own behavior.


Personnally have not met much in the way of dual diagnosis Autism and NPD .
How do you know that? Most people aren't open about NPD if they have it.

I'm not discounting your experiences at all! I'm just saying that it's hard to say why people behave the way they do. People can be abusive and manipulative with many other conditions or even none at all. I suspect that my extremely abusive ex, who raped me repeatedly, has antisocial personality disorder because he seems to have most of the traits and appears incapable of feeling empathy. I can't say for sure since I'm not a psychologist. I've taken a few psychology classes in college, but that still doesn't make me qualified to make diagnoses.

I just think we need to be careful about stigmatizing people. Not everyone who is a narcissist or who has narcissistic traits is going to be abusive, and it's not something people can help. On the other hand, abusive behavior and individuals ARE worthy of stigma.


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11 Oct 2023, 5:06 pm

You make a very good point , 8O and i can get the point your making ....but it wasnt necessary to include about your husband raping issues involving his illnesses .. You have written before about that in other threads ..
Having seen that you wrote that , its not something , i would forget happening to you . And have expressed regrets about that concerning you and your experience .And am sad that that happened to you .. But actually , my posts are not directed towards you . But my own opinion based on my own experiences ??. That does. not jar me though ..Have not shared my experiences involving my own circumstances,regarding forced intercourse . But i can get some of the idea of the pain you have had regarding that ..? Maybe . Very often Aspie women end up abused, i believe.
"But YOU are correct ,it was probably not appropriate to generalize sll NPD people "But the ones that i personally knew that demostrated those typical behaviours cause me to shy away from any people demostrating Overt symptoms/ characteristics of NPD ,TO ME!. ... I do read most of all your posts that show up in threads i write to btw .
Did not mean to trigger you Twilight Princess, if that occured? 8O . Guess some of us might be at different levels
on the spectrum and some of us have different levels of experiences . :mrgreen:


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11 Oct 2023, 6:01 pm

Jakki wrote:
Education on a topic < (Repeated Personnal experience+ research+study..IMHO)

Okay ..yes , then I will say, he/she is a big meanie pants... :mrgreen:
But i do have extensive experiences with these type of personality types , both legally and in childhood growth circumstances.. And can and have over the years. Long before ,i understood that there were words to describe the repeated behaviours ,i have seen, done to others and myself throughout many years of my life .That were typical of certain people I have met . Does cause me to use severe words in reflecting on my experiences and knowledge of these people, that I have had to disengage with in order to preserve myself and maintain some degree of mental and physicsl safety . But have had to watch others whom were not as fortunate as me to recognise, unfortunate circumstances perpetrated upon unwitting people whom have no experience in these same circumstances.
Did Cause me to take several Psyche classes,one of them being abnormal Psychology classes in college.
So yes to qoute you :" And I dont like them"


Do you think I don't have extensive experience dealing with these sorts of people?

I too have had to deal with people that many on here would likely baselessly label as narcissists simply because they were insufferable as*holes to deal with. I've been on the receiving end of abuse of all sorts for both my entire childhood and most of my adulthood. I've had to learn to navigate both of my parents mental health concerns and how they were expressed.

For some reason this is overlooked when I point out that some people here apply the term narcissist far too eagerly, or that those same people often appear just as deserving of the label as those they apply it to.

For some reason some people insist on trying to reduce this topic to black and white, with anyone with "the bad conditions" being irredeemably evil while anyone with autism is assumed to be a victim, unless they're in the news for something bad, then some posters will try to pretend that they weren't really autistic because stereotypes.

I've dealt with plenty of sh***y people in my life, many of whom had some narcissistic traits, but I also recognize it would be a stretch to try to pretend like they were all narcissists and psychopaths simply because I found them to be antagonistic.

Further though, is that I don't believe people with those conditions are incapable of making positive contributions to society. For some reason arguing this point seems like complete heresy to some people, but that doesn't make it incorrect. Apparently having compassion for some people is deeply offensive to some posters here, but that's not my problem in the slightest, that's a them problem.

Jakki wrote:
Your approach to disqualifying my post, causes me to have my own misgiving about your less than compassionate response to my post .??.
If you have not experienced these type of personality types you might not wish to offer a opinion on my posts .
Less a certain lack of compassion might document you as a similiar personality type ?.IMHO?. hopefully not?
Judging by the contrast if your inquireys to my pm, vs this post you have made in response to my post on this thread. This situation might cause me to wonder if you might possibly have been a cause of others here getting banned.Directly or indirectly ??. IMHO. :roll: "Not intending to be Rude" Quoted to FuneralEmpire.


I'm sorry if I seem to lack compassion. What I've grown to lack is patience because it's always the same s**t whenever this topic comes up. The bad guys are everywhere and they all have this disorder despite having never been evaluated outside of interacting with some random non-expert who happens to post here.

People see a thread about narcissism or antisocial personality disorder or whatnot and immediately they're listing off everyone who's ever disagreed with them and trying to one-up each other over how people like that should be made to suffer.

If people get themselves banned over how they choose to respond to me, how exactly is that my fault or problem? I can't control how others post, only how I post. Afaik, I'm pretty good at staying within the rules, not resorting to personal insults or telling people to die because I don't agree with them. If I'm capable of this I fail to understand why others are incapable of it, given that I'm not particularly blessed when it comes to emotional regulation or impulse control.

I'm not the poster who was wishing death to other posters on here. That poster needs to seriously examine why a discussion makes them so angry they'd wish death on other people.


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11 Oct 2023, 6:04 pm

^^ I was sharing my experiences because, in a response to FXE, you said:

Quote:
If you have not experienced these type of personality types you might not wish to offer a opinion on my posts .
I was demonstrating that I have experience with abusive people. FXE does, too. My husband was just one of the abusive people I dealt with, and I’ve never shared everything about him publicly because it would be imprudent to do so.

At this point, I don’t mind talking about most stuff. There’s power and courage in talking.


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11 Oct 2023, 6:23 pm

funeralxempire wrote:
Jakki wrote:
Education on a topic < (Repeated Personnal experience+ research+study..IMHO)

Okay ..yes , then I will say, he/she is a big meanie pants... :mrgreen:
But i do have extensive experiences with these type of personality types , both legally and in childhood growth circumstances.. And can and have over the years. Long before ,i understood that there were words to describe the repeated behaviours ,i have seen, done to others and myself throughout many years of my life .That were typical of certain people I have met . Does cause me to use severe words in reflecting on my experiences and knowledge of these people, that I have had to disengage with in order to preserve myself and maintain some degree of mental and physicsl safety . But have had to watch others whom were not as fortunate as me to recognise, unfortunate circumstances perpetrated upon unwitting people whom have no experience in these same circumstances.
Did Cause me to take several Psyche classes,one of them being abnormal Psychology classes in college.
So yes to qoute you :" And I dont like them"


Do you think I don't have extensive experience dealing with these sorts of people?

I too have had to deal with people that many on here would likely baselessly label as narcissists simply because they were insufferable as*holes to deal with. I've been on the receiving end of abuse of all sorts for both my entire childhood and most of my adulthood. I've had to learn to navigate both of my parents mental health concerns and how they were expressed.

For some reason this is overlooked when I point out that some people here apply the term narcissist far too eagerly, or that those same people often appear just as deserving of the label as those they apply it to.

For some reason some people insist on trying to reduce this topic to black and white, with anyone with "the bad conditions" being irredeemably evil while anyone with autism is assumed to be a victim, unless they're in the news for something bad, then some posters will try to pretend that they weren't really autistic because stereotypes.

I've dealt with plenty of sh***y people in my life, many of whom had some narcissistic traits, but I also recognize it would be a stretch to try to pretend like they were all narcissists and psychopaths simply because I found them to be antagonistic.

Further though, is that I don't believe people with those conditions are incapable of making positive contributions to society. For some reason arguing this point seems like complete heresy to some people, but that doesn't make it incorrect. Apparently having compassion for some people is deeply offensive to some posters here, but that's not my problem in the slightest, that's a them problem.

Jakki wrote:
Your approach to disqualifying my post, causes me to have my own misgiving about your less than compassionate response to my post .??.
If you have not experienced these type of personality types you might not wish to offer a opinion on my posts .
Less a certain lack of compassion might document you as a similiar personality type ?.IMHO?. hopefully not?
Judging by the contrast if your inquireys to my pm, vs this post you have made in response to my post on this thread. This situation might cause me to wonder if you might possibly have been a cause of others here getting banned.Directly or indirectly ??. IMHO. :roll: "Not intending to be Rude" Quoted to FuneralEmpire.


I'm sorry if I seem to lack compassion. What I've grown to lack is patience because it's always the same s**t whenever this topic comes up. The bad guys are everywhere and they all have this disorder despite having never been evaluated outside of interacting with some random non-expert who happens to post here.

People see a thread about narcissism or antisocial personality disorder or whatnot and immediately they're listing off everyone who's ever disagreed with them and trying to one-up each other over how people like that should be made to suffer.

If people get themselves banned over how they choose to respond to me, how exactly is that my fault or problem? I can't control how others post, only how I post. Afaik, I'm pretty good at staying within the rules, not resorting to personal insults or telling people to die because I don't agree with them. If I'm capable of this I fail to understand why others are incapable of it, given that I'm not particularly blessed when it comes to emotional regulation or impulse control.

I'm not the poster who was wishing death to other posters on here. That poster needs to seriously examine why a discussion makes them so angry they'd wish death on other people.



Am with you on that idea of people whom engage in saying/writing seriously bad things to say on a thread. Might need to find another site that would be more accepting that type of post. Am regretfully & sorry that i may or maynot have judged you inappropriately, if So ... Then those interactions might cause anyone some suspicions . Or Upset feeling and apologize if I have been a party to that in some way or another . . . . :(
Was merely expressing own POV that has been / or caused me to share some of my own lifetime experiences.
Regarding this thread . :nerdy:


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20 Nov 2023, 3:00 pm

2 things here for me, 1 therapist would class me as an AuDHD with NPD, the other put it as a naturally high self confidence and esteem. There's been no abuse other than emotional neglect being an undiagnosed child and not receiving emotional support at home. Ithe other is i tend to get branded with NPD by other autistists on the internet. Perhaps high self esteem and confidence is rare, therefore be shunned and on my own most of the time.


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20 Nov 2023, 5:07 pm

PerfectlyDarkTails wrote:
2 things here for me, 1 therapist would class me as an AuDHD with NPD, the other put it as a naturally high self confidence and esteem. There's been no abuse other than emotional neglect being an undiagnosed child and not receiving emotional support at home. Ithe other is i tend to get branded with NPD by other autistists on the internet. Perhaps high self esteem and confidence is rare, therefore be shunned and on my own most of the time.


Hmmm.. gotta wonder if it might be ASD effects ....?


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