femininity vs men's height
Boo, please don't start another fight. But I agree that it's interesting how people can make the most important decision in their life without any rational reasoning. You don't buy a car because it feels right, you buy it because it is right. Do we have any word in this attraction thing? Or is it decided for us?
The_Face_of_Boo
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Boo, please don't start another fight. But I agree that it's interesting how people can make the most important decision in their life without any rational reasoning. You don't buy a car because it feels right, you buy it because it is right. Do we have any word in this attraction thing? Or is it decided for us?
Shush... I am awaiting their reaction, plus I extended my post.
I think there's a deep social taboo going on here, women in general are still less likely to admit to others and to themselves what X and Y traits they find more sexually arousing/attractive and what others turn them off; and maybe feminism made them less likely to admit that they are sexually attracted to what are seen as..."dominance" traits in men (taller, smarter, stronger, more confident, more successful than her...etc).
They prefer taller men because they are simply more visually masculine to them and more sexually attractive to them (same for toned body, jaws, other masculine traits...etc); and the protection factor is more sexually arousing.
I seriously don't buy it that any of this is due to some childhood complexes or whatsoever.
The_Face_of_Boo
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It may be biological, motherhood instincts perhaps? Yet I highly doubt most of women's preference for tallness is due to that. The way you put it, the three of you, sounds more psychological jumbo mumbo to me than biological.
I am talking about sexual attraction.
Last edited by The_Face_of_Boo on 18 Feb 2014, 2:55 am, edited 1 time in total.
On the plus side I was really good at basket ball in high school because I was one of the tallest girls. The only sport I've ever been good at
But I sometimes wonder if being 5'7" is a turn off to guys. I seem to be surrounded by so many women smaller than me that even though I am slender I feel like a heffalump. They seem more dainty than me. One of these small women told me she envied me because I am "statuesque" and "regal." I'm not sure whether I regard that as a compliment...
I've got to say I've never given men's height much though apart from a couple of men I know. One I thought was a bit too tall, he was over 6ft, but I still liked him anyway. The other was about my height, but I felt awkward when we sat next to each other because I was taller than him seated. I felt like I had to slouch and another guy was 5ft 10 and I thought, "you are the perfect height" but then I really got on well with him, so I don't know if it was more his personality or height or what that I was attracted to.
I can't think of any men shorter than me that I've been aware of liking me at all. I genuinely don't really want someone over 6ft because I feel threatened rather than protected, but I would rule out a very tall man if we got along well.
If it's psychological, it's potentially changeable, if it's biological, it's not. I don't want to justify it, I want to change it. I'd think you would want women to be able to be attracted to shorter men. Or would you like to continue to have your options limited so you can whine about it?
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The_Face_of_Boo
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Oh, the typical whining accusation, what makes you think I was whining or even bitter? I was talking about the reality of what I observe. Now my turn to counter:
I see It's strongly biological and hardly changeable in your case, because in almost every height thread you "whine" about your boyfriend's height and you "whine" how his shorter height makes you feel awkward at times. As if you are trying to convince yourself to bypass it but it keeps annoying you..."at times".
If it's really a non-issue for you then you wouldn't whine about it every time.
I doubt your relationship will last long, you will replace him once you catch the interest of a as good but taller equivalent guy. Feeling awkward around your lover is eventually a recipe for a disastrous attraction regression and load of sexual and emotional baggage for both sides.
Last edited by The_Face_of_Boo on 18 Feb 2014, 12:27 am, edited 1 time in total.
The_Face_of_Boo
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Yours is way more odd.
And btw, It's not me who is limiting my options, I personally have no problem but most women in return do so the limit comes from them, not from me, read the study again.
Last edited by The_Face_of_Boo on 18 Feb 2014, 2:56 am, edited 1 time in total.
Well... This thread has made me not even want to bother going for women who are taller or the same height as me anymore.
I don't really care though. There's plenty of short girls.
If I happen to fall for a girl who's my height or taller and she feels the same way (and is completely confident with herself and truly does NOT care about height, and is not one of those ladies that SAY they don't care, but deep deep down they do) - then sure I'd be with her.
But I'd rather not.
I used to be open to dating any woman who was interested, and I guess you could say I am "open" to it, but I'm a whole lot more selective than I used to be. Partly because of all these height discussions that occur on this website and the posts I've been reading from the females.
I'll date a woman taller than me if she comes after me, otherwise I'm going for the women I find attractive that are also shorter than me.
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I don't really care though. There's plenty of short girls.
If I happen to fall for a girl who's my height or taller and she feels the same way (and is completely confident with herself and truly does NOT care about height, and is not one of those ladies that SAY they don't care, but deep deep down they do) - then sure I'd be with her.
But I'd rather not.
I used to be open to dating any woman who was interested, and I guess you could say I am "open" to it, but I'm a whole lot more selective than I used to be. Partly because of all these height discussions that occur on this website and the posts I've been reading from the females.
I'll date a woman taller than me if she comes after me, otherwise I'm going for the women I find attractive that are also shorter than me.
Amen to that, I was used to be the same, on okc and in real life I went for shorter and taller alike - the only dates that sticked more than a first date were the shorter than me ones (yet didn't last due to other reasons) while same height and taller ones never bothered to go after first date (yet they knew my height before, knew well they're taller and *all* of them said they never tried it before but will try it and sees how it goes); I falsely thought online communication may bypass the height issue in ladies but after reading such studies and posts from women I think I was totally wrong. It never occurred to me that could be the height, I really liked most of the taller girls (it happened they were sane).
I am 163 cm so more half of the female population are taller than me, the younger ones tend to be really taller too but It's pointless to go after them, finding a girl who has zero issue about her guy being shorter is like trying to find a needle in a haystack - it is that pointless. Some might think I am limiting my options but seriously... for once I don't blame myself and my shortcomings, when it comes to height I loudly say that the issue is from the female side.
And the ladies here are not so typical and less likely to care what others might think of their partners yet they still care for height, imagine how worse it is among the typical women.
Oh that reminds me of some members here.
They know themselves well *wink wink*.
I don't think those women necessarily lie about it. They may think they actually don't care about the height even though they do.
Also I always wanted to find out if it's all about being taller than your partner or taller than average? What do you think? A short woman may feel protected with a short guy, but she would feel even more protected with a tall guy. Wouldn't she?
I don't think those women necessarily lie about it. They may think they actually don't care about the height even though they do.
Also I always wanted to find out if it's all about being taller than your partner or taller than average? What do you think? A short woman may feel protected with a short guy, but she would feel even more protected with a tall guy. Wouldn't she?
Maybe, I have no clue.
In my experience, the thing I enjoy so much about dating a girl who is shorter than me is... (drum rolls).. HEIGHT IS NEVER EVEN THOUGHT ABOUT!
It's freaking AWESOME!
And by thought about I mean in terms of her feeling nervous or sad or whatever it is that women feel when they're dating a guy that's shorter than them. One of those conversations among their female friends that start with that notorious sentence, "He's great.. BUT..."
It's like we can be a normal.. Boy meets girl, girl meets boy, boy and girl like each other, therefore boy and girl date. There's no ifs, buts, what's, who, huh's about the height. It's not mentioned, it's not talked about as an issue, (even if passive aggressively so, because that's usually how it pops up). The only time the girls would say something was to talk about how much people make fun of them for being "cute" or "tiny" and how some girls wish they were as petite as them and how they wished they were a little bit taller etc.
Any female I've dated that was 5'4 or shorter was fine. Although MY personal favorite, in terms of what I think of as the perfect height for me is a girl who is 5'2.
Any female I've dated that was 5'5-5'7 would make subtle passive aggressive remarks about my height. Or usually what they do is compliment, glorify or constantly mention how tall some other guy they know is. It'd be the equivalent of me complimenting, glorifying or constantly mentioning how big one of my female friends tits are. I mean it's just weird, rude, uncomfortable, makes you feel self conscious and lowers self esteem.
Then on the flip side, I did date one female who was 5'9 and had no problems at all with me being much, much shorter than her (I was much younger at the time so I was 6 inches shorter and 3 years younger than her!) It was more awkward and embarrassing for me, than it was for her. She would laugh off other people mentioning it and being weirded out by it. She honestly had no problems with it. But she was an unusually confident and self assured woman who couldn't care less about norms. Plus, what even attracts her was totally different from the norm too. So. She was definitely a strange bird.
She was a close friend of mine for a long time that decided to pursue me herself. I always had a crush on her but I was too shy and scared to try anything myself. If she had not pursued me, we definitely never would have dated.
It's awkward to me to see people consider height so critical that they'd actually assume it prevents them from being truly happy with someone and avoid/end relationships over it. Aside from extreme height disorders (dwarfism, for instance), height is as coincidental as the color of a person's hair to me; neither serves as a basis for me to judge compatibility from.