Need Help with a girl at my gym

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bdubs
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17 Jul 2009, 10:22 am

I'm def not a ladies man. I want a girlfriend though. There is this girl that goes to my gym that I like. She seems real quiet and nice. When I was doing crunches I saw her checking me out, I think (she kept glancing over at me). I have never spoken to her before. She goes to the gym the same time as me everyday at 530pm. What should I do? Also I have no idea on how old she is? She looks younger than 30 but older than 20. I'm 22. Any help would be greatly appreciated. Thanks!



Janissy
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17 Jul 2009, 10:31 am

bdubs wrote:
I'm def not a ladies man. I want a girlfriend though. There is this girl that goes to my gym that I like. She seems real quiet and nice. When I was doing crunches I saw her checking me out, I think (she kept glancing over at me). I have never spoken to her before. She goes to the gym the same time as me everyday at 530pm. What should I do? Also I have no idea on how old she is? She looks younger than 30 but older than 20. I'm 22. Any help would be greatly appreciated. Thanks!


Make a lighthearted comment that is about exercising in the gym but DOESN'T!! !! mention what her body looks like. Something like this;

"I'm exhausted. How do you get the energy to do so many reps?"

or

"Does the music they play over the loudspeaker drive you crazy? I wish they would play something else" (this is assuming neither of you uses an ipod and the gym plays music) If it turns out she likes the music, don't let that derail you. Instead, turn it into a conversation starter, like this: "you do? That's cool. I'm more of a heavy metal fan myself [or whatever] but I guess that would be hard to exercise to."



bdubs
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17 Jul 2009, 11:01 am

I like your idea to compliment but not on her looks. My gym is really crowded at that time. Do you think I should try to time so I catch her in the parking lot hahaha . I could say "I see you here all the time whats your name?" Then I could ask her if she wants to play racquetball with me (I don't know if she does).



Janissy
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17 Jul 2009, 11:05 am

bdubs wrote:
I like your idea to compliment but not on her looks. My gym is really crowded at that time. Do you think I should try to time so I catch her in the parking lot hahaha . I could say "I see you here all the time whats your name?" Then I could ask her if she wants to play racquetball with me (I don't know if she does).


Do ask her to play racquetball, but only if that's an activity done at this gym. You said she's quiet so she'd probably be intimidated and put off if she thought you were asking to meet her off gym grounds when she doesn't actually know you. But if racquetball is one of the gym activities, then definately ask her.



bdubs
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17 Jul 2009, 11:07 am

Thanks for your help Janissy. Ya there are four raquetball courts in the gym. What about the idea of catching her in the parking lot?



Hummys
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17 Jul 2009, 12:07 pm

Racquetball is great cardio. Ask her if she's ever tried it before. If she hasnt, ask her if she'd like to give it a shot sometime. Also, you could just go introduce yourself for a start. No need to ask her out on a date right away. Talk to her about her workout or other gym stuff. Keep it brief the first time, then the next time you see her smile and wave or go say hi and take it from there. And dont bother her when she is in the middle of working out. Maybe approach her when she is warming up or leaving. But just introduce yourself first. Good luck man.



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17 Jul 2009, 12:25 pm

bdubs wrote:
Thanks for your help Janissy. Ya there are four raquetball courts in the gym. What about the idea of catching her in the parking lot?

I don't recommend it. Most people are wary of being approached in parking lots, especially after dark. This might be true even when it gets dark at 4:30 in winter. If you talked to her in the gym, and she didn't feel comfortable with you, approaching her in the parking lot afterwards might be interpreted at stalking. Only approach her inside the gym, where people generally feel safer, due to the presence of cameras, gym employees, and other members.



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17 Jul 2009, 12:28 pm

About approching her in the parking lot, don't, she could get kinda scared, especially if she goes there alone. Just to let you know. Approch her in the gym itself.



bdubs
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17 Jul 2009, 12:49 pm

Ok I won't, the reason why I ask is because I am usually less anxious when less people are around. I'll just man up and talk to her in the gym.



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17 Jul 2009, 12:49 pm

bdubs wrote:
I like your idea to compliment but not on her looks. My gym is really crowded at that time. Do you think I should try to time so I catch her in the parking lot hahaha . I could say "I see you here all the time whats your name?" Then I could ask her if she wants to play racquetball with me (I don't know if she does).


just a thought

if you compliment her in the gym in a normal way, it would, to her, perhaps, seem more normal

than if you cought up w her in the parting lot, trying to be all private and nice and comfy.

if you know what i mean...
im no expert, but the whole trying to get into a private setting right away seems weird.


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Janissy
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17 Jul 2009, 12:53 pm

Aspie1 wrote:
bdubs wrote:
Thanks for your help Janissy. Ya there are four raquetball courts in the gym. What about the idea of catching her in the parking lot?

I don't recommend it. Most people are wary of being approached in parking lots, especially after dark. This might be true even when it gets dark at 4:30 in winter. If you talked to her in the gym, and she didn't feel comfortable with you, approaching her in the parking lot afterwards might be interpreted at stalking. Only approach her inside the gym, where people generally feel safer, due to the presence of cameras, gym employees, and other members.



Absolutely right. In the gym is a much better bet.



bdubs
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17 Jul 2009, 12:56 pm

One more thing how do you think I could bring up finding out her age? Or should I wait till later to ask her that?



the_wife
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17 Jul 2009, 2:02 pm

bdubs wrote:
One more thing how do you think I could bring up finding out her age? Or should I wait till later to ask her that?


Wait until later. Also, I assume you've checked her left hand for a wedding/engagement ring?



LostAlien
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17 Jul 2009, 2:15 pm

I agree, wait about the age question. It can be a touchy subject for some women. You've said that she looks between mid-twenties to thirties? If I remember correctly? If I've remembered correctly, there is no need to find out her age until you find out if you like her personality anyways.

Only if you view that she may be underage, then finding out her age is kinda important but this doesn't seem the case here.



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17 Jul 2009, 2:54 pm

Go to the counter and buy two small bottles of water. Walk back to where she is working out, open the bottle and leave it by her side. Walk on drinking your bottle and try not to grin too hard. If she's decent she'll come over to say thanks and then the rest is up to you. If she doesn't say thank you she probably isn't worth your trouble.

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17 Jul 2009, 3:28 pm

^ Damn, you're gooooood. :wink:


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