What are absolutely necessary requirements for an LTR?

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I posted a similar thread a week or two ago about "Dealbreakers" and it got kind of out of hand. A lot of people making outrageous demands of their potential partner. This post is only about things that from experience, or that you know intuitively, are absolutely necessary to be in a lasting relationship with someone.

Here's my list:

- Cares about me as much as I care about her. (In my limited experience, if a girl isn't as interested in you, even if there is "some" interest...it won't go anywhere at all. And even if there's strong interest, but not as much as you, it eventually won't work out.)

- This goes back to number 1, but I'm the most important thing in her life other than her family, hobbies, job, etc. If she puts her friends ahead of me or anything trivial like partying ahead of me, not going to work out.

- The woman is a one man woman. She isn't easily distracted by "hot guys." I don't check out a lot of women in public and don't watch porn, and if a woman is threatened by the fact that I have harmless crushes on 30something actresses in tv shows, she has problems because I don't care if she likes Tom Brady or Brad Pitt as long as she doesn't shove it in my face.

- Despite the first three requirements, is sane, and likes me for the right reasons, not because she's obsessive or desperate. 1, 2, and 3 are the result of genuinely liking and loving me, not out of psychosis.

Flexibility...

Basically compatible personality types...

Friendship

Humor

Reasonable.
Willing to compromise.
Willing to work up the courage to talk about problems.

Based on experience...

1. She would be an Aspie. Reason: They tend to say exactly what's on their mind. And when it comes to sexual issues, there would be no hints or mind reading necessary, and no mind games. After all, we don't want to suffer the same fate as the Duke lacrosse team. Also, there is less pressure to fit into cliques.

2. She would like the Simpsons and South Park. Admiration for these shows signals open-mindedness.

3. She would have a very high sex drive, and have no problems with premarital sex, oral sex, or fetishes.

4. She wants to start a family.

5. She likes to travel.

6. She is preferably college educated.

7. She is preferably curvy in terms of physical appearance.

8. She is a Christian, but not a fundamentalist.

1. Location - would have to live near enough to be able to see eachother regularly in person - reasons being people are never quite the same online as irl, and I hate phones so would rather avoid them too. Could deal with being long distance short term if one person had to move for work or something and the other couldn't follow immediately.

2. Patience - to be honest I'm me, I'm annoying, it would never work without it

3. Just the standard relationship things like getting on well, having a laugh, and basic attraction tbh. I don't think I'd be too bothered if someone didn't want sex before marriage if I really really liked them (I'd have to really really like them though ), I'm an atheist but would be ok being with someone religious so long as they let me believe what I wanted and didn't try to convert me, probably not someone much younger or shorter than me - never really been attracted to people who are but I wouldn't rule it out for definate, smoking would probably be the biggest issue but I think I could cope so long as they never tried it in my house!

1. Not really religious. If she believes in God, faith is still not a big part of her life.

2. We get on really well, enough to perhaps live together without any immediate signs of personal friction.

3. There's a mutual understanding that the relationship is monogamous. Checking out other people would be fine with me but no third parties allowed.

4. There is no "no masturbation" rule. I know some women that do this, I don't think I would tolerate a relationship with this requirement.

I am in a well-established LTR, but if I could change things about the "primary" one I am in...which is just a sort of ridiculous fantasy...I'd say I'd want a partner who liked to help clean up the place and do the dishes on equal terms and not be completely obsessed with collecting every little thing...but then not taking care of the stuff and just flinging it around randomly, or leaving it for other people to manage.....even though I am a hypocrite for saying that, as I am a total pack rat.

I lived with a guy for 2 years...Some of the funnest times we had were when we did laundry together...and he was a neat freak who folded his underware and alphabetized all his books and cds..and he always did the dishes because he claimed he was the only one who knew how to do them...and the toilet paper had to be facing a certain way and he would get snappy at me for using too much of it...The bed had to be made a certain way...Everything had to be symmetrical...but he was also relaxed and creative and funny...and I was a bit of a slob...and once we got rid of our roommates, we sorta had separate rooms, so i had my room where I could be messy, and he had his room where he could be tidy..and that's where we slept...We remained friends for years after we lived together..The relationship ended over something really silly...but maybe there was something about our chemistry that seemed to mean that we were really meant to be just friends...I hardly get to see him anymore 'cause he has a kid and stuff...

Anywhoo...I sorta miss having someone who has an active interest in the chores..

Well, i seem to recall, this may be off topic, but most divorces are about any of the following: children, religion, sex, money. You agree on those 4, your relationship should be good.

For me, a relationship would be about acceptance, compromise, and interaction/communication. For me, a relationship would start slowly: companions > intimate friends > lovers > lifelong commitment; with those first three phases taking 6 mos to a year to achieve. Now, this hasnt happened to me in RL, but with my mindset id imagine this is how it would pan out.

Only one thing is required: true love...

Although communicating clearly wouldn't hurt...

1.} Open, unconditional communication

2.} Love with no conditions

3.} Both give each other their space

4.} Has a medium sex drive, with no problems with premarital sex

5.} Must be Catholic, but not a conservative

6.} Likes movies and eating out on the occasion

7.} College student currently

8.} Must be witty and hilarious

9.} NOT a hippie/hipster

10.} Loves to talk

For me, the person has to have a good sense of humor, be understanding, and be open with me. They should be my best friend, and I theirs. I also like someone to be on a similar level of geekiness to me.

Basically I only expect from a mate the same things I can give to them. I'm in a great LTR right now, six years, married last year. It's only so strong because we're friends first, and lovers second.

The longest relationship I've had was about 7 years. In that time what was important:

1. Sex. It may be a physical expression, or be an emotional outlet. But if you're not getting any, it's not a fun relationship.
2. Communication. You gotta be able to joke, talk about things and be able to respect and accept the other person. These are all components in effective communication.
3. Compatible interests. If you can't share a few things in life, you're going to grow apart. Assume both of you are sleeping (8 hours) and working (8 hours), this leaves 33% of your time to do things together and grow together.
4. Trust. Trust that they care and love you. You may not know it, you may not feel it, but realize it's there.

Think back to the days of arranged marriages and today's matchmakers. I think if you can hit it off with the above 4, love will follow. Previously, marriage & love weren't in the equation and those relationships lasted quite a bit longer than those of today.