How to ask a girl out

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I've been obsessed with a girl (not in a creepy way) for a while now. She was in one of my classes last semester (at a U) and I've run into her lately. Really, we've only talked once or twice. However, I think she's the most beautiful person and not asking her out is killing me. I've decided that I have to ask her out or else not asking her out will continue to bother me even more.

So, I want to just go up to her and say "I think you are absolutely gorgeous; Can we go out and get a drink sometime?"

Does this seem like an okay plan? In all honesty, I can't make small talk. I just want to be to the point.

Does this have any chance at success? Will it come off as sweet and flattering or creepy and aggressive?

In all honesty, I'm a smart, nice, and fairly attractive person. (However, I'm sure that she doesn't share any of my intense interests, which does hurt my confidence; how can I ever be compatible with someone?) Do you think there is a better way for me to go about asking her out?

Try a casual approach. Say to her, "Hello, how's it going? Want to meet for coffee sometime?" If you appear over-eager, that can quickly turn a girl off. If, on the other hand, you play it cool, she is much more likely to want to be with you.

If she does say yes, and you do meet her there, drop a few hints that you like her (i.e., compliment her on her appearance, tell her you're having a great time with her, etc.), and if all goes well, schedule a second casual date, and build from there.

Edit: And during the date, ask her lots of questions (but nothing too creepy or too personal) about herself. Asking someone about herself shows you are genuinely interested in them, and that way she can do most of the talking (if you're not very good at small talk; I know I'm not), and you can learn more about her at the same time.

Best of luck!

No, no, asking her out is fine. But "I think you are absolutely gorgeous" is a bit too bold to say this early on. Also, I wouldn't recommend drinks for a first date. I would recommend something like coffee or a casual lunch for the first date.

Just try talking to her a few times. See if you have anything in common. You could try saying, "Did it hurt?" Then when she's wondering if it's got around what she's been up to, you say, "When you fell from heaven!".

Hmmm...it will make an impression. What kind of impression depends on what type of girl she is. I would melt, even if I hadn't thought of the guy in a romantic way before that, but every girl is different.

Just ask yourself what you have to lose, if you do it. Then ask yourself what you have to lose, if you don't.

Good luck.

Try to have a comfortable, flowing conversation with her (on her own, not with friends) about something, anything. Maybe related to the present workload this semester. Try to turn the topic of the conversation on to food or coffee. Then ask her if she would like to meet you to have a snack in the afternoon in a nice and at least somewhat nearby café or cheap restaurant (I would have a few different locations in mind before doing this, just so I can adapt to what her opinions on food and coffee are). She probably (though not certainly) would get a strong notion that you're interested in her, but a comparatively innocent sort of interest. If she says yes, get her number and finalise arrangements for meeting up. If she says no, stay calm and contentedly say something like "that's OK. I have to go to a class now, see you later" and leave.

You don't have to do all these things to the letter, but the general idea is that you should try to make it seem like it isn't such a big deal. After all, it isn't; first dates and the like are very commonly arranged, and sometimes even happen, only to amount to nothing.

You can also be more original with your first date ideas than just coffee or a cheap restaurant, as long as you're not getting expensive or too far out of the way. For example, I once took a girl out to a festival. One of the things that went wrong on that unsuccessful date was that even though the festival was scheduled to begin on the date we went to it, it was still in the preliminary stages and nothing was happening, so be careful.

"you're absolutely gorgeous" should be part of the inner passion in getting to know her. Instead of saying something she has probably heard many times before with people no less seriously honest than yourself. But if others say it, too, then be different. Figure out something else about her that attracts you and lead off with that. does she have a brain, a personality, a passion for art? How about intellect or spiritual growth? This will really get her attention because people that are interested in her for her beauty rarely see anything else, and I have an idea that she knows that, already.

Merle

No offense, and once again, I'm surprised that Aspies of all people don't have the balls to be brutally honest, but it IS creepy that you've invested so much time thinking about some woman you don't even know and how to ask her out. Also, the fact that you would tell a random stranger, who's already perfectly aware of how attractive she looks, how beautiful she is, tells me that you don't know what you're doing. Maybe better off sticking to that girl in the math club that doesn't look that great but laughs at your jokes?

I don't go to bars or hang out with rowdy crowds, but when I'm out in public, I am nothing but honest. Honesty cost me my last girlfriend for giving her my opinions on life. I also told off a jock I was playing pick-up football with twice my size that was harassing me and he did nothing about it. So I think unless you're going to tell your boss at work what you think about him/her or get in a fight with an annoying in-law, nothing wrong with telling the truth. And in those situations, there are ways to convey the truth without saying it. My cousin's husband is hated by the whole family...he beat her, threatened her, cheated on her, meeting up with young girls on myspace...and while no one has told him off, he can sense the negative vibes when he walks into a room.

I think quite the opposite, being careful and polite is actually quite a strong asset as long as you don't let yourself get pushed around.

I was quiet, polite, and courteous all throughout my teens, and as a result I was verbally and physically harassed in school until graduation. I also sounded like the OP, wanting to ask out women that didn't know I existed. And when I got the balls to ask them out, let's just say it wasn't pretty. I think the OP, like a lot of guys on here, have to go after that quiet girl that doesn't have the playboy centerfold body. Similar people date similar people.