I'd rather be call a jerk than told nothing at all...

Post Reply New Topic

I fricking hate the lack of information. When I am texting someone new, or even worse, when I was doing online dating and was messaging someone, and it goes on for a while, until I say something somewhat dumb, or possibly construable in some other manner, I always overthink it, and it stresses me completely. I realized, though, that if I turn off vibrate and make it completely silent, more of my anxiety disappears. People could be texting me, but I won't know. Without a confirmation of a text, I just plain ruminate and eventually say something even dumber back to them. Or I'll then try to make up an excuse that I'm just exhausted or something. It is a self-esteem issue certainly, but also a bit of an egocentric issue. It doesn't register with me always that they might have their own life, or that it doesn't matter to them. But, for some reason, I think that the one single text decides the whole relationship. Inevitably, I scare off girls in mere days. I've been finally learning to deal better with the anxiety and awkwardness. I started on .5 mg of klonopin and disabled all my online dating profiles, as well as my automatic fb updates on my iphone. This way, I can check when it comes to mind, and not on command. I think this will go a long way with not appearing to be that crazy, needy guy I probably come off as. I just started on the benzodiazapine, so we'll see how this goes. No adderall around here, so am having to use Vyvanse though

Maybe then I might be able to form friendships with girls without worrying so much... We'll see.

As a certain musician once said: "I dont care what you think as long as its about me"

A bad rep is in most occasions better than being unnoticed.

However making a decision to become a jerk is much harder than it sounds. You need to actually stop caring about what other people may think of you... otherwise they´ll see through the act.

It sounds like you're a nervous wreck. Too much technology in your life, perhaps.

To be honest, you probably aren't scaring online girls off. They just aren't that into you and stop replying because they lose interest in the conversation.

I doubt you've done anything at all to scare them off.