Scared I'll Never Find Love Again Because Of AS
Hey,
My boyfriend and me just broke up a few days ago. In case your wondering, I'm a bi male. We've been together for five years. My boyfriend told me he was breaking up with me because I was too negative towards him, and my depression turned him off and everything.
Last year was Hell for me. It was a kind of Hell I'm scared I'll never recover from. My grandmother who I lived with for 25 years, passed away last October. During then, my mom was dating a man that treated me very unkind. I feel like I have psychologial trama, because of it. I've tried to tell her about it, but, she's refused to listen. Plus, my band I was in decided to do their own things. All those things came to a head a few nights ago, when my boyfriend decided to break up with me.
He's the only boyfriend I've had. It took me 20 years to find him. I'm 25 now. After he told me that, I've been crying non stop. My eyes are red from all my crying, I'm becoming dehydrated, and I've had thoughts of sucide. I'm also scared, because of my AS, that I won't find anyone else to fall in love with. It's the only thing that's on my mind now. I want someone to hold me in their arms, tell me everything's gonna be okay, and that they love me. I'm scared I'll never find that again, because of my social skills. What should I do?
There, there. And they say folks on the spectrum don't feel emotions! At 25 years old you still have lots of time to find somebody knew. Yeah, you'll compare him (or her) to your old boyfriend. That's normal. People rebound all the time. We're pretty strong in that regard. Hope for the best.
_________________
One Day At A Time.
His first book: http://www.amazon.com/Wetland-Other-Sto ... B00E0NVTL2
His second book: https://www.amazon.com/COMMONER-VAGABON ... oks&sr=1-2
His blog: http://seattlewordsmith.wordpress.com/
You were someone that another person wanted to stay with for five whole years. That's not the relationship of someone with no hope for love, though I understand how hard it is to imagine something new in the wake of something like that. People have weaknesses, and a common one is keeping negativity and criticism from affecting them too much. There are a number of people who are reasonably equipped to handle that though, and 25 is plenty young enough to learn better coping methods and gentler ways of talking to people.
Try to look at those empty spaces as ones that could be filled with just about anything.
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