Adam_Raki
Pileated woodpecker
Joined: 15 Nov 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 191
Location: Somewhere in our Universe
13 Jun 2013, 11:06 am
MacDragard wrote:
AS has nothing to do with it, other than maybe she thought you were using it as a crutch/excuse for your behavior and thus she probably assumed that you would never take responsibility and learn to calibrate your behaviors accordingly.
Surprisingly, she knows AS pretty well because she worked with people in the spetrum. And I said to her that it is certainly not an excuse for any thing I could "do"
MacDragard wrote:
How do you know this? What kind of discussions were you having? Were they ones of deep emotion?
What can I say?... Well, it seems obvious! We discuss primarily about basketball and pizza all the time! And I always have a crush on a girl during these exciting moments!
MacDragard wrote:
Even if she told you this word for word doesn't necessarily make it true. What a woman says can be incongruent with what she feels, and what she feels at one moment can be completely different from what she feels in another.
Have you ever heard about mind blindness?
MacDragard wrote:
Also, what happened when you were over at her appartment? Were you sitting close to each other? Were you getting intimate?
Top-secret, YES and YES!
MacDragard wrote:
Most importantly, I can tell based on your post that you put a lot of investment in her when you say things like you "lost" her even after a two month non-relationship online, and then you go and say you are alone and depressed, and feel that you will be that way for the rest of your life. When you think this, you speak it VERY loud even when you don't say it, and she picked up two things that will drive any woman away: neediness and insecurity.
I think I talked about what is actually a "general framework". This experience of "pseudo-two months of non-relationship quasi online"
, is one experience among others. You just have to read a little bit more carefully Adam_Raki wrote:
Now at almost 32, I am still alone and so depressed, but I know that I am not the only one in this stupid case!
I am now convinced that I will spent my life alone. This was already the case, but this experience reinforces it.
I am now convinced that I will spent my life alone. This was already the case, but this experience reinforces it.
MacDragard wrote:
So to take away from this:
1) You need to work on yourself before you even consider getting into a relationship with someone. If you can't love yourself and be happy with who you are and what you have, and realize that true happiness can only come from within and never from any external source, how do you expect a woman to love you?
Misery is not attractive
-Casanova
2) The undeniable truth is you become what you think about.
A man is but the product of his thoughts. What he thinks, he becomes.
-Mahatma Gandhi
We are shaped by our thoughts; we become what we think. When the mind is pure, joy follows like a shadow that never leaves.
-Buddha
The more man meditates upon good thoughts, the better will be his world and the world at large.
-Confucius
The happiness of your life depends upon the quality of your thoughts: therefore, guard accordingly, and take care that you entertain no notions unsuitable to virtue and reasonable nature.
-Marcus Aurelius
1) You need to work on yourself before you even consider getting into a relationship with someone. If you can't love yourself and be happy with who you are and what you have, and realize that true happiness can only come from within and never from any external source, how do you expect a woman to love you?
Misery is not attractive
-Casanova
2) The undeniable truth is you become what you think about.
A man is but the product of his thoughts. What he thinks, he becomes.
-Mahatma Gandhi
We are shaped by our thoughts; we become what we think. When the mind is pure, joy follows like a shadow that never leaves.
-Buddha
The more man meditates upon good thoughts, the better will be his world and the world at large.
-Confucius
The happiness of your life depends upon the quality of your thoughts: therefore, guard accordingly, and take care that you entertain no notions unsuitable to virtue and reasonable nature.
-Marcus Aurelius
THANK YOU MacDragard! I didn't know these quotes
Adam_Raki
Pileated woodpecker
Joined: 15 Nov 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 191
Location: Somewhere in our Universe
13 Jun 2013, 11:08 am
Stalk wrote:
Happened to me like a billion times. Pushing too much, or moving too fast. Said the wrong things, unnecessary things. Didn't sugar coat them....
I understand Stalk, thank for your testimony!
