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Why do girls hate shy guys?

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Why do girls hate shy guys?
They expect their men to protect them (sexism) 14%  14%  [ 15 ]
Society says shy guys are bad 18%  18%  [ 20 ]
Shy guys are worse at sex 4%  4%  [ 4 ]
Shy guys are just boring 22%  22%  [ 24 ]
Women who reject introverts are just as superficial as men who reject fatties (duh!) 13%  13%  [ 14 ]
Other 29%  29%  [ 32 ]
Total votes : 109

auntblabby
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06 Aug 2013, 10:35 pm

^^^
that makes sense :)



Max000
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07 Aug 2013, 12:59 am

corsair wrote:
i don't think girls hate shy guys...maybe you're getting that vibe because shy guys don't really know how to express their interest? just a guess. but i like shy guys, i feel more comfortable around them.


Yes, this is true. I think back to when I was in school, I was pretty shy, especially around girls. I remember some girls showing interest in me, and trying to talk to me. But I just became tongue-tie, and didn't say much back, and they didn't try to talk to me again. But that wasn't their fault. I can't blame them for that. They tried.



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07 Aug 2013, 1:03 am

Max000 wrote:
corsair wrote:
i don't think girls hate shy guys...maybe you're getting that vibe because shy guys don't really know how to express their interest? just a guess. but i like shy guys, i feel more comfortable around them.


Yes, this is true. I think back to when I was in school, I was pretty shy, especially around girls. I remember some girls showing interest in me, and trying to talk to me. But I just became tongue-tie, and didn't say much back, and they didn't try to talk to me again. But that wasn't their fault. I can't blame them for that. They tried.

you weren't lucky enough to find one that was stubborn enough.



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07 Aug 2013, 1:37 am

I used to be shy, but I've worked on that for a long time and now I'm not.

The thing is, I still don't know what to say half the time. I think the shyness originally came from not knowing the right things to say.

Back in the day I could say something to someone, and I just had no idea how they'd take it. Whether I got a good reaction or a bad reaction just seemed like a lottery to me, with the odds often stacked against me.

So with hindsight being shy was actually a necessary survival tool for coping with aspergers.



auntblabby
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07 Aug 2013, 2:03 am

one thing I have found that works reliably for me, is the old Ben Franklin adage, "'tis better to keep silent and as a fool be thought, than to open one's mouth and remove all doubt." it even rhymes :)



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07 Aug 2013, 1:32 pm

Max000 wrote:
corsair wrote:
i don't think girls hate shy guys...maybe you're getting that vibe because shy guys don't really know how to express their interest? just a guess. but i like shy guys, i feel more comfortable around them.


Yes, this is true. I think back to when I was in school, I was pretty shy, especially around girls. I remember some girls showing interest in me, and trying to talk to me. But I just became tongue-tie, and didn't say much back, and they didn't try to talk to me again. But that wasn't their fault. I can't blame them for that. They tried.

yeah i think girls just get tired when they don't get any response back or a response that doesn't feel sufficient enough. it kinda makes them feel rejected, which is one of the most feared things for a girl (imo).



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07 Aug 2013, 3:29 pm

corsair wrote:
yeah i think girls just get tired when they don't get any response back or a response that doesn't feel sufficient enough. it kinda makes them feel rejected, which is one of the most feared things for a girl (imo).

it's one of the most feared things for a guy as well. :hmph:



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07 Aug 2013, 4:26 pm

Max000 wrote:
FlanMaster wrote:
Max000 wrote:
FlanMaster wrote:
Uprising wrote:
I got the feeling that the male gendered majority of this board sees only the kim kardashian types as actual women.

Kardashian woman type: an insecure Caucasian female who wishes she was of African heritage, obsessed with dating wealthy athletic "African heritage" male celebrities.


Wow, are your grapes sour? :lol:

I would hardly classify Kim Kardashian "types" as insecure Caucasian females, and just because a woman prefers African-American males, doesn't necessarily mean that she wishes she was of African heritage. Would you say that a white guy who prefers to date Asian females has a wish to be Asian? I don't think so. Some people just prefer interracial relationships.

The Kardashians have a very public life. if it were a simple matter of preference, imo, then all the other cues would be missing. The Kardashians "need" the public notoriety. There are other cues that suggest that they prefer the "African American" culture. They were called "wannabes" when I was in school. There were the interracial daters and there were the "wannabes". I have cousins, nephews and nieces from interracial relationships. Some of the relationships are true love, and some were because of "wannabes". True relationships are fine, regardless of racial difference. Relationships resulting from being obsessed with wishing you were a different race than you were born will be disaster, imo.

Imo, the Kardashians are "wannabes. Nothing sour about it.


Again would you call a white male who only dates Asian females (there are lots of them), a wannabe Asian?

From my experience of talking to women, a lot of American women are attracted to African American men. Mostly physically. They could care less for African culture, except for maybe listening to some rap music. They are just attracted to black men.


You really don't know what you are talking about as usual women are attracted to the culture not the not looks women are attracted to how you act not how you look. Most women I have talked to aren't physically attracted to African men at all but love how they handle and present themselves. The women you are talking to more than likely say they like the way African men look rather than how they act so they wont be called racist



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07 Aug 2013, 4:34 pm

redriverronin wrote:
You really don't know what you are talking about as usual women are attracted to the culture not the not looks women are attracted to how you act not how you look. Most women I have talked to aren't physically attracted to African men at all but love how they handle and present themselves. The women you are talking to more than likely say they like the way African men look rather than how they act so they wont be called racist


Ironically enough... the end of a racist post ends with the statement "so they won't be called racist"...

What does an african man look like? How does he act?

Believe it or not... there are a lot of caucasians that were born and raised there... All egyptians are african...

just... feh


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appletheclown
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07 Aug 2013, 4:43 pm

Max000 wrote:
FlanMaster wrote:
Max000 wrote:
FlanMaster wrote:
Uprising wrote:
I got the feeling that the male gendered majority of this board sees only the kim kardashian types as actual women.

Kardashian woman type: an insecure Caucasian female who wishes she was of African heritage, obsessed with dating wealthy athletic "African heritage" male celebrities.


Wow, are your grapes sour? :lol:

I would hardly classify Kim Kardashian "types" as insecure Caucasian females, and just because a woman prefers African-American males, doesn't necessarily mean that she wishes she was of African heritage. Would you say that a white guy who prefers to date Asian females has a wish to be Asian? I don't think so. Some people just prefer interracial relationships.

The Kardashians have a very public life. if it were a simple matter of preference, imo, then all the other cues would be missing. The Kardashians "need" the public notoriety. There are other cues that suggest that they prefer the "African American" culture. They were called "wannabes" when I was in school. There were the interracial daters and there were the "wannabes". I have cousins, nephews and nieces from interracial relationships. Some of the relationships are true love, and some were because of "wannabes". True relationships are fine, regardless of racial difference. Relationships resulting from being obsessed with wishing you were a different race than you were born will be disaster, imo.

Imo, the Kardashians are "wannabes. Nothing sour about it.


Again would you call a white male who only dates Asian females (there are lots of them), a wannabe Asian?

From my experience of talking to women, a lot of American women are attracted to African American men. Mostly physically. They could care less for African culture, except for maybe listening to some rap music. They are just attracted to black men.


Would you also call a man who is attracted to all races a philanthropist? No. Geese gimmie a break, I've seen attractive african ladies, asian ladies, russian ladies, european ladies, south american ladies, ladies from north america including alaska and canada, middle eastern ladies, native american ladies have boggled my fancy (probably because I am part native american) too, and I still get accused of having a foreigner fetish. I mean come on, do want me to have a tree fetish and think all other humans are ugly? No. I've got language learning software, so I can learn if need be.


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07 Aug 2013, 4:53 pm

Feralucce wrote:
redriverronin wrote:
You really don't know what you are talking about as usual women are attracted to the culture not the not looks women are attracted to how you act not how you look. Most women I have talked to aren't physically attracted to African men at all but love how they handle and present themselves. The women you are talking to more than likely say they like the way African men look rather than how they act so they wont be called racist


Ironically enough... the end of a racist post ends with the statement "so they won't be called racist"...

What does an african man look like? How does he act?

Believe it or not... there are a lot of caucasians that were born and raised there... All egyptians are african...

just... feh

Ironically, she wasn't being racist at all. Being attracted to any other group of people usually isn't intended to be racist. The thought of someone being racist by only dating the people she hates as a group is completely ridiculous, and utter non-sense. I don't believe in any fetish, just a word for sexual adventure, which I hope is what I will have with my wife if I ever get married. Would you care if you were your wife's fetish? Not me, not at all, not even if she was hypersexual.


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Feralucce
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07 Aug 2013, 7:39 pm

appletheclown wrote:
Ironically, she wasn't being racist at all. Being attracted to any other group of people usually isn't intended to be racist. The thought of someone being racist by only dating the people she hates as a group is completely ridiculous, and utter non-sense. I don't believe in any fetish, just a word for sexual adventure, which I hope is what I will have with my wife if I ever get married. Would you care if you were your wife's fetish? Not me, not at all, not even if she was hypersexual.


The statement was made that this person is attracted to african men because of how they handle and present themselves... This statement is racist. It implies that all african men will have the same behavioral characteristics. Racism is the belief that races have distinctive cultural characteristics determined by hereditary factors... The statement was racist.


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Kjas
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07 Aug 2013, 9:33 pm

Feralucce wrote:
appletheclown wrote:
Ironically, she wasn't being racist at all. Being attracted to any other group of people usually isn't intended to be racist. The thought of someone being racist by only dating the people she hates as a group is completely ridiculous, and utter non-sense. I don't believe in any fetish, just a word for sexual adventure, which I hope is what I will have with my wife if I ever get married. Would you care if you were your wife's fetish? Not me, not at all, not even if she was hypersexual.


The statement was made that this person is attracted to african men because of how they handle and present themselves... This statement is racist. It implies that all african men will have the same behavioral characteristics. Racism is the belief that races have distinctive cultural characteristics determined by hereditary factors... The statement was racist.


I could be wrong but I interrupted her meaning as "African-American culture", and African American culture is known to have quite a strong subculture of them own, even though it varies from place to place, there are still many commonalities.


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07 Aug 2013, 10:04 pm

These stereotypes are stupid. Do people realize that if men were only interested in "hot" women and women were only interested in life of the party types that most people would be single and stay single?



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08 Aug 2013, 12:03 pm

My apologies. I missed an entire post when reading.


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08 Aug 2013, 12:41 pm

Feralucce wrote:

The statement was made that this person is attracted to african men because of how they handle and present themselves... This statement is racist. It implies that all african men will have the same behavioral characteristics. Racism is the belief that races have distinctive cultural characteristics determined by hereditary factors... The statement was racist.


Which is a compliment. Besides she never said all African men or that any African men were the same specifically. Racism is not the belief culture is handed down through lineage, that is absurd. I'm part Native American, even a max of 1/8th, which would make me multi-racial when proven (I think, because it would mean I could join the tribe). Because I am interested in wolves, Native American artwork and enjoy archery, am I racist? I actually enjoy wild game to beef from a farm, campfire food to oven cooked meals. Am I racist? No. It is just who I am. If she said "Well I like how Native American men are so calm and collected when they are around us women!" I would find it a bit assumptive, but it is still a compliment. Racism is all about hate, not complimenting black men on there skills with the ladies, which came from a lady in the first place. I doubt African/African American men would care if white women all thought they "have good social skills and are good presenting themselves to ladies", sounds like your jealous to me.


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