Can an Aspie be like this?
Zylon
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Joined: 26 Jan 2007
Gender: Male
Posts: 74
Location: deep within my shell
I have been diagnosed with Asperger's due to severe social and worldly problems. However, I am so unlike Asperger's in some ways. I am just wondering here if I can still be classified "Asperger" with the differences I have from them.
Here I will give one aspect of me which I fear separates me from Asperger. If you think it is compatible, please let me know.
1. Once I am accepted as the personal friend of someone I like, that person becomes the most important aspect of my life; they always will come first. I can get very close, caring, warm, and affectionate with them. I am always there for them. The "coldness" I hear about aspies is the complete reverse for me.
My severe social problems has to do with having a very different mind from NTs, like we are from different planets. I cannot share superficially with them. My interests and orientation to life and reality itself is deeply different from them. However, this is only a problem between strangers, not close friends. I am a very poor stranger, since we have nothing superficial in common. I am also extremely shy. As close friends there may still be a problem of sharing mutual worldly interests, but there would be no problem with the personal part; they would very much feel loved.
However, sex, in the post-pubescent sense, is completely alien to me; it never developed in me, and it has no meaning to me. I can be very intimate and romantic, but I am totally non-sexual. This non-sexuality has nothing to do with intimacy issues, my brain just never changed since early childhood.
If this is not compatible with Asperger, there definitely is no other category in the DSM or ICD for me; I must be either classified "Asperger" or I am out of the DSM or ICD, even though my problems are severe.
Certainly seems like something to meditate upon, though I think most of us are more comfortable around others than we're ever willing to admit. The more one is affected by AS, the more everyone else notices it, we aren't solely discussing your reflexes.
_________________
"Standing on a well-chilled cinder, we see the fading of the suns, and try to recall the vanished brilliance of the origin of the worlds."
-Georges Lemaitre
"I fly through hyperspace, in my green computer interface"
-Gem Tos
Diagnosis is just the subjective opinion of your psychiatrist based on his medical training. Someone else might diagnose you differently. It sounds like you've done a lot of reading up on different mental illnesses. If you feel that you fit nothing in there, then I don't know what to say. I'm just the opposite. When I read about different conditions, I find a piece of myself in all of them.
Many of us have people we are comfortable with and put before anything else. For me it's my mom. When I trust someone they become very important to me. But I am still an aspie. Many of us feel closeness to others, the coldness you hear so much about is the N.T. perception of us based on our inability to always show our affection in a way they can recognize.
Just because I'd catch a bullet for my mom or baby brother doesn't mean they know it. Mom has spent the past three decades coaching me to say "I love you too." I never am the originator of the phrase, I only parrot it back to her. I feel it, but I don't say or really show it. That's were the" coolness" comes from. Not what we feel, but what they see.
I get super attached to people, like the OP. Also, I felt asexual for years after I was an adult. I guess I was just a late bloomer because that did eventually change.
I am an Autistic person who needs people, mostly other Autsitic people. { I don't need people who treat me 'less than."]
I am also atypical because I am extroverted[sometimes] Basically, what this means is that not only do I annoy NTs' but many other Autistics as well.
Zylon
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Joined: 26 Jan 2007
Gender: Male
Posts: 74
Location: deep within my shell
Just because I'd catch a bullet for my mom or baby brother doesn't mean they know it. Mom has spent the past three decades coaching me to say "I love you too." I never am the originator of the phrase, I only parrot it back to her. I feel it, but I don't say or really show it. That's were the" coolness" comes from. Not what we feel, but what they see.
If with someone I like, and if I feel that the people around me will allow it, I do very, very much show affection in the way people will recognize it.
I also have the instinct to say "I love you", and it hurts very much when that is considered inappropriate, such as to a stranger (yes, I can love strangers). But when it is deemed appropriate by the people involved, hugs and "I love you"s fly out of me constantly, more than NTs.
What does this do to my Asperger Dx?
Zylon
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Joined: 26 Jan 2007
Gender: Male
Posts: 74
Location: deep within my shell
I am an Autistic person who needs people, mostly other Autsitic people. { I don't need people who treat me 'less than."]
I am also atypical because I am extroverted[sometimes] Basically, what this means is that not only do I annoy NTs' but many other Autistics as well.
I was born to love a certain type of person, it is "love before first sight". Sex is incompatible to my brain, because my brain has developed full before I was 7 years old; there is no more room, so I will never have sex in me. However, my heart overflows with warmth and physical closeness. One I love someone, it is stable and unconditional.
I am introverted, and extremely shy. I do not approach strangers, even when I should.
I need people desperately, but only of certain types.
I never treat people I like as "less than"; to me a person I like is more, much more, than others.
Here I will give one aspect of me which I fear separates me from Asperger. If you think it is compatible, please let me know.
1. Once I am accepted as the personal friend of someone I like, that person becomes the most important aspect of my life; they always will come first. I can get very close, caring, warm, and affectionate with them. I am always there for them. The "coldness" I hear about aspies is the complete reverse for me.
I'll leave the rest alone. This much here sounds a little on the obsessive side if you ask me. Not overly though. It does show a great sense of loyalty to the friend which is well liked as well by good people.
_________________
Your Aspie score: 130 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 88 of 200
You are very likely an Aspie
Zylon
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Joined: 26 Jan 2007
Gender: Male
Posts: 74
Location: deep within my shell
Again, you are saying what aspie is not. I need to know what it IS. Not everything is aspie, that would be ridiculous. Many things can cause social problems.
So I ask you, what IS aspie, that I may be one?
Similar Topics | |
---|---|
Most Aspie Song Ever? |
15 Apr 2024, 8:20 pm |
Aspie Or Just Private |
15 Apr 2024, 3:43 pm |
The Secret to Aspie Knowledge |
11 Feb 2024, 10:49 am |
Getting Frustrated Had Enough (Aspie or Deeper) |
23 Mar 2024, 6:39 am |