I came to see the truth. (repost from the adult section.)
I deleted all my profiles I had on those dating sites i had. I was not getting any responses, or after a few dates, they did not even have the denceny to tell me it was not working out and they just blew me off.
I try to work on my AS to find someone and I always get crapped on. God made me with AS so he must not want me to be with anyone.
Everyone with AS, like me are just social ret*ds. I am one, I won't change. The sooner everyone with AS sees that God made us all social ret*ds so we can be screwed with and we won't play his little games anymore, the happier everyone will be.
I'm reposting this here because i think this will help more people in this section.
sinsboldly
Veteran
Joined: 21 Nov 2006
Gender: Female
Posts: 13,488
Location: Bandon-by-the-Sea, Oregon
Well, good luck raging against God!
I don't see that sort of God. . I guess . Albert Einstein said I believe in Spinoza's God who reveals Himself in the orderly harmony of what exists, not in a God who concerns himself with fates and actions of human beings. So I guess I don't get all 'woe is me' and take it personally.
maybe you just need a change of how you think about God, then you can relax enough to get to know someone that might like you for own bad Aspie self!
it's never easy, never.
Merle
hi ken,
your not wrong: dating is plain weird and a game that we AS do not excel at naturally.
it is good that you have taken some time out from the dating sites if they were only making you miserable. spend some time with friends and thank yourself for not breaking your balls to try to fit in when your not appreciated. better to be single and happy!
then maybe, when you are feeling positive and strong once again you could try again to meet someone. i think that AS gain more from developing relationships with a strong intellectual focus and shared interests which is not always easy to find. good luck.
Hmm. Ken, I strongly disagree. Accepting dates from incompatible people is the most direct path too disappointment. You have to lose the desperate attitude and accept and love yourself first of all. Then you'll learn to be more discriminating and that's really the key. I wrote an ad that repelled most people and found one that was the perfect match for me.
Before that I was alone for years, reading ridiculous stories of people who move between relationships within weeks and have brains "wired for finding a mate." 30 days without sex is difficult for them? Yeah right. Pretty much then I knew I didn't have the brains wired in the usual way, but I learned to accept and live with myself and when I found the peace within things started getting better. Thank god for the Internet most of all, because you can communicate and find out about other people before meeting them and maybe get more confortable than by going on a real blind date where you would have to do the impossible to impress someone.
I did just what he did -- removed all my profiles at once, after a couple years of trying. The problem with internet dating is that people consider the people they meet "internet people", as if they can just dismiss them with a click, even after some dates with them. I think that's where that whole blowing off he mentioned comes from. If we don't like something internet-related, one click and it's gone. We should NEVER think of people that way.
So, people are more likely to go on a date with a Mr. Internet Guy/Girl whom they're apathetic about, because it feels so very, very non-commital, and "oh well" easy to get out of at the first whim of unpleasantness. (Ya, that's how you should handle a relationship -- first minor unpleasant feeling, run like hell! )
_________________
Christianity is different than Judaism only in people's minds -- not in the Bible.
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