sexless life making me lose my mind

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Hi everyone,

Like the title says, in the 27 years of my life I've never managed to have a romantic or sexual relationship with anyone. Despite many times in which real connection existed between me and the other person and the other person was initially attracted to me.

That's always how it goes. Someone is attracted to me, they start teasing me but I don't know how to respond to that appropriately and this turns them off. It's happened so many times I lost count.

Do people here have a solution to my problem? Because I'm honestly starting to considering the idea of giving up on my life. I was diagnosed with Asperger's last September, so at least I got an explanation. No solutions though and there is no medical support for my type of problem. Prostitution is not an option.

Thank you

Do you try being direct with women Going for broke & telling women straight up that your interested in them might push lots of women away & get you the creep label or some other bad terms, I've def been there. However hints & teasing/joking just do not work for some Aspies like myself. If your the same way you really need a partner who is capable & willing to be direct with you. I got the thee girlfriend's I've had by them taking the initiative & being direct with me. We met on forums & they realized that hints would not work or were not working because I'm too dense to pick up on that. I majorly value communication within a relationship & need a partner who is the same.

I always wait for them to take the initiative. They chase me but then always and in every case change their mind when I let myself being caught. I have childhood trauma related to sexuality therefore I can't be direct about sex things.

They tease me and then they leave that's what happens all the time.and give me no chance to do anything really. No chance to prove myself of to prove them that I am what they are looking for.

The situation has reached an extreme in which every interaction traumatised even more.

A good response is to give them (genuine) compliments. If they start touching you a little bit, touch them. Ask them about their passions, interests, life, what they're doing this week.

But another question is: are you physically and romantic attracted to them? Some people may take more time to form attraction than others. Some people are demisexual (i.e. you need an emotional bond to feel attraction).



Yes, meet more people. Meet dozen and hundreds. Meet guy friends and have a social life. Are they bars/clubs to frequent in your areas? Social events and meetup groups?

If talking to girls directly isn't your style, then use dating apps. But with those, you need great pictures. Take hundreds of pictures to get 5 great ones. Read guides on portrait photography. Even consider paying a photographer. Pictures are the most important part so spend hundreds of hours on them if need be.

Find people who have good dating lives, frequently get their advice on your profile.

If you're socially inexperienced, just accept that you may be nervous on your first 5-15 dates. This is normal. Don't let this deter you. You need to get through those growing pains in order to become comfortable.

Thank you for the reply. Unfortunately my social life is already as open as it can be. I already meet new people basically every week and I've been doing that since I was teenager (I'm almost 30 now).

Il keep trying, sure. Maybe one day the miracle will happen. Hopefully soon

Good luck with everything in your future, 196.

It is difficult to have unfulfilled romantic wishes and desires, but you are certainly not alone as an autistic person in this regard.

Have you taken a good look in the mirror, an honest self assessment, and asked yourself what can I do to make myself more attractive (i.e the whole package) to women?

God helps those who help themselves.

Yes I did. And like specified in the original post, women are already attracted to me. The problem is that when they get close to me then I don't treat them "manly enough" or something.

no regrets with some of my escorts or sex workers i had sex with, because i wasn't getting my sexual wants or needs met in my last relationship, whom i feel very reluctant to call an ex-girlfriend because of that.

Well then you isolated the problem, Fix it. Nobody else will.

P.S. I had the same problem for the entirety of my teenage years until I was around 21. I know the feeling. My high school friend called me a "heartbreaker" for all the girls who had crushes on me but like a dolt I did not see it.