Do people assume you're gay?
I think I do the same thing with girls I'm interested in. It ought to be a simple thing to correct, because it's so obviously not the way to go about it, but I can't quite seem to manage it, or even work out what I should be doing.
you look feminine, I think
people might...Iwho knows, like girls for the most part, you know
guys just don't look as fun
As for the original poster's dilemma. Perhaps also you are being asked if you are gay because the one doing the asking is gay or else has a friend of the same sex that is attracted to you. That's usually how gays meet up outside of bars and Pride fests. In other words they are putting their feelers out trying to figure you out. Don't take it personally. Straights do the same thing.
It's not that I'm asked so much as that people just assume, but it's not really a dilemma for me, because it seems to keep the majority of girls, whom I strongly dislike, from hitting on me.
Odd. If people do not see you going out with the opposite sex they think you are a homosexual, even if the equally have not seen you going out with same sex.
I notice that too with the "Maybe he's gay since he's alone." I used to hear that alot at my work place.
.... and if a person was homosexual and not in the closet, why would they be single or without a partner?
If they're in the closet, it's more likely they're going to try be with the opposite sex to feel "accepted."
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I live as I choose or I will not live at all.
~Delores O’Riordan
Funny, I was serving a customer today and he's a regular there too. Blatantly asked if I made the food, I just replied I am unable to. His comment for that was "I'm sure it would be better if you had made it"
My manager was there also picked up on that comment made by him and said to me "That was soo gay!" My only answer on that was "Well, a compliment's a compliment, would've been better if it was a female though. Never mind" and carried on with what I was doing.
I do live in what is recognised as the gay capital of the UK and maybe the capital of Europe too
Yes.
Oh god yes.
All the time, people think I'm gay, because all my friends are gay, and I'm a little "camp." Oh, and I'm the only male in our friend circle-group-type-effort.
It really annoys me when I'm talking to a friend-ish person, and they'll just say "Are you gay?"
I laugh it off, but it still really annoys me.
Oh god yes.
All the time, people think I'm gay, because all my friends are gay, and I'm a little "camp." Oh, and I'm the only male in our friend circle-group-type-effort.
It really annoys me when I'm talking to a friend-ish person, and they'll just say "Are you gay?"
I laugh it off, but it still really annoys me.
Why does it annoy you? Do you think it might be because you associate being gay with something bad? When women flirt with me, and for some strange reason I attract beautiful women, I feel it's a compliment, but I usually make them understand very early on that I'm gay. I'll joke and say "You are gorgeous, do you have a twin brother?".
I thought my husband was gay when I first met him (so have others, I'm not the only one). I've met a few other guys over the years that my friends and/or I "read wrong" and they all seemed to have the same characteristic: they don't seem threatening, they're just nice. They're not "typical guys" in some way. They seem thoughtful, considerate.
Folks, even my mom, thought I was gay when I was a teenager and in college just because I didn't date much or well. My mom thought my occasional boyfriend was a front. It was a funny discussion. Even now, I still get asked on occasion. I'm still as dumbfounded as ever, but I see it as flattery. As Woody Allen once quipped, "Being bisexual doubles your chance for a date on Friday night."
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Apologies if I sound judgmental, preachy, dictatorial, offensive or overly rigid. Constructive criticism via PM is welcome.
I actually had this happen recently. I was talking to a female friend of mine who was telling me about some *ahem* interactions she would occasionally have with a female friend of hers. Jokingly, I told her that I had the internet for that sort of thing, and didn't need to hear it from my friends.
She said she could probably hook me up, and I was like "No, really, it's ok..." Among other things, I'm not an extremely promiscuous person, and for another, I didn't know the girl's name. She's an attractive enough person, but there's this kind of "OMG WEIRD" thing that comes up at the prospect of possible sex with someone I barely know.
In any case, she asked me if I was ****ing my (male) roommate in response, which made me LOL. If by "****ing* you mean "Playing Dawn of War over a LAN", then sure! Otherwise, not so much.
Another friend of mine commented to me once that "Now that I know you like girls, we have to get you a girlfriend." Apparently, since she'd never seen me with a girl, she wasn't sure that I liked them.
Apparently there's an expectation that heterosexual males be relatively open to sex with women they don't know very well, based on looks. Not fitting that seems to imply to people that I'm gay, even though I'm not.
Yes, and I am. Having the subject become an issue can get very boring after a while.
As though they don't exist which, as I'm also autistic, is very easy for me.
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ChrisDH
Yes, and I am. Having the subject become an issue can get very boring after a while.
As though they don't exist which, as I'm also autistic, is very easy for me.
Yeah, I get told Im gay alot . So when they ask I just start playing and totally come on them. Either they laugh it off and realize that Im not or get totally f**k'n paranoid. Its good either way the guys that play it off have a good sense of humor. And for the ones that take too seriously... They dont ever bother talking to me again so I make it a win win scenerio . Then they see my 34D gorgeous fiance and they're all like wtf?! ha as*holes!
sometimes yes... i get hit on by both girls and guys. I usually attract guys who are drug addicts and offer me drugs, gay men, very pretty stupid girls, or nerdy intellectual girls. And some animals run after me. no only kidding. No one has ever blatantly told me i look gay.. but I get asked at the workplace if i have a girlfriend, and i think the people are asking if im gay, or they could be interested in me. But in all honesty I'm not ready to date.. im 18.
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