This one girl...

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Yeah, I know... The title sucks eh? Overused much?

Anyways... This one girl, Ayla... I like her a lot, maybe even love her, but she's way too pretty and cool for me. Every attempt I've made to talk with her has failed. It hasn't been shot down in any way by Ayla, but it has still crashed and burned. What do I do? I think she likes me, but I suck at talking to girls, because they always treated me like something disgusting attached to the bottom of their shoe in school...

Help?

make a screen dump of that message you just wrote and e-mail it to her.

What if she laughs?

What if she doesn't ?

Here are two things that I have learned in 30 years (and before I was diagnosed with AS) and they have helped a little.

If you never take a shot, you'll always miss.

It's a translated proverb, but the meaning is pretty clear and it's true. If you don't do something, it will never have any result.

Stop thinking, just kiss me.

Those are the words of a girl I dated, and even though that relation lasted for like two weeks, but still it was good advice, and damn was she a kisser.

Wow, lol. I suppose. I'm supposed to be hanging out with her this weekend, but the key words are 'supposed to be'.

Seriously, don't do it. You have no idea what I'd do if someone did that to me. I'd show it to all my friends and probably give it to Anonymous. If you really want to make yourself look like a complete idiot, go ahead and do it. I'm telling you, it's a really bad idea. You're going to look really creepy too.

Anna is right. Do not print out this post and give it to her. That will not end well.

Part of the rules of the dating game is that you are a cool, fun, person meeting another cool, fun, person. You don't worship the other person, you're on basically the same level, and you don't mind too much if it doesn't work out.

By printing this out you will betray all of the attitudes I listed above. You will not succeed until you believe the above as well.

You enjoy to expose others' secrecy and like being a dirty....(I don't want to say that word),no?

Anyways , exposing such thing and turn it into a public mockery and embarassement against a guy , even if the guy sucks, is totally unethical , immature and.... bitchy (ooops , I said it this time) act. You could just reject him and that's it , no need to fuss about it around but I guess that something people like to do to boost their weak egos.

LeeAnderson, don't do it because there are certainly girls like AnnaF.

Such thing happened to a friend of mine during in mid-school , he begged me to write a poem letter and so I did and he put it in her bag under his name and there was nothing explicit in its context nor in its meaning (we were all 13 then) . She hysterically fussed about it next day , screaming and laughing , she told all her friends about it and they all started picking and teasing on him , she even showed it to the principal (as if it's a sin) but he was just been amused by it and did nothing to my friend , she exploited the letter for maximum attention whoring.

The teasing lasted for 2 years against him and it reached me since I was his best friend and she felt that this wasn't his type of writing as she asked if I was the one who wrote the letter for him

He didn't deserve such treatment and she didn't derserve anyone's attention.

Now, she was 13 so probably wasn't mature enough but what's shoking that a 18 yo girl would do the same.

Yeah, people can be really cruel. I know it's not always a good idea to trust people for this reason. I think though that if you did really really need to articulate your feelings, you could put them down in a poem, it could be a good way of expressing yourself, but only do it if you REALLY TRUST her, and know for sure she is not the type of person who would ever do that to you.

A good male friend of mine, a popular NT admittedly, and I too, write poems for people we love, and they generally go down well.

I don't think sending this post would be a good idea though, because I don't think anyone really likes the idea that their private lives are being posted up on a public forum.

Well, apparently... You guys think I'm pathetic and creepy. Wow.

Great! So now I guess that you have just learned to not trust anyone.

Good luck.

Yep, what a great aspie community...

Well if she likes you, then why does she shoot you down? If she really did like you, one would think she'd accept you by now. My suggestion is this, you need to be entirely honest with her and say:

"Ayla, I really like you a lot, and I care about you as more than just a friend, and I wanted to know if you feel the same way towards me? Be honest with me, ok?, I'm being honest with you."

If she blows you off or laughs at you, dump the b***h and leave her, she's not worth having around. This will sound weird, but I'll say it anyways. A jellyfish may be beautiful and graceful to the eye, but if you know that it can harm you and leave scars with you if you touch it, the jellyfish is no longer beautiful. In the same way if a girl is physically beautiful and enticing, but has a "sting" to her if you like her romantically, she shouldn't be beautiful to you anymore because her nature overshadows whatever physical beauty she has.

However, if she is sincere and politely says "No, I'm not interested" or "Yes", or whatever else, you know at least she is polite and not hateful and she's worthwhile to keep around as a friend. I think it is best to be blunt.

Shouldn't project previous rejections on somebody else. This section is renowned for negative posters, they are not going to help you no. Ignore them

That's not at all what was meant, and LPP is for some reason kicking out at AnnaF for saying what was trying to help you.

No-one thinks you're pathetic or creepy. But sending the post you made to the girl would seem both, because it shows you talking about her to somebody else... but then showing her the conversation. This is a slightly bizarre occurrence. And it seems pathetic because rather than doing what is detestably referred to as 'manning up' and talking to her, you're kind of passively asking her out by sending her a message you sent to somebody else saying you like her.

Just go up to her and tell her how you feel, and how you feel like an idiot whenever you talk to her and it crashes and burns; but explain that it's BECAUSE you like her that it's so hard for yo.

The worst she can do is say no.

I don't think anyone who posted thinks that!! Try reading over the posts.