Get the impression I don't mean much to anyone?

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So... I've always had trouble making friends. I used to have the pattern of making a friend who was my whole world for a few months (or years in some cases) but then drifting apart or whatever. Have tried recently to pick better friends and spend less time with them so it's a more normal friendship etc. I have a few friends who I like spending time with and who seem to enjoy hanging out with me. The problem is I get the impression their life would just carry on if I wasn't around. I'm used to people drifting away from me after a while, but of the friends I have right now, I don't think they care that much about me. I mean they seem to enjoy hanging out, but the main thing I've noticed is they never EVER text me out of the blue to see how I am. Any time we talk or meet up is always because I texted them. I feel like if I didn't contact them I'd never see them again, and I hate how one-sided it feels. I shouldn't have to be the only one making effort - that's not how healthy friendships work, but I dno't know what to do or how to find new friends. Any help, anyone?

I have the same thing going on right now. My best (only) friend never really bothers to contact me. I'm always the one who initiates everything, even though I don't do it all that often. But he has AS too, so I know how that goes.

I was literally just coming on here to post the same thing. People mostly just contact me when they need something from me. My friends rarely ever contact me. It is almost always me contacting them. I am getting so frustrated and angry, and feeling really hopeless about it. I just want some friends who care about me as much as I care about them.

This is exactly my point. I know I don't do much as they do (currently unable to work) but I always make sure I'm not texting too often, but even when I don't text at all no one ever bothers to see how I am. I just feel like if I never bothered to text them in future I'd never see or hear from them again and they wouldn't think twice about it.

I try REALLY hard to be a good friend, and my difficulties make it much harder work TO be a good friend, but I still try and put the extra effort in. But friendship is supposed to be mutual, and they're supposed to WANT to know how you are if you haven't spoken in a while, and WANT to hang out with you. These things would never happen if it weren't for me always initiating the contact or whatever. Just feel like why should I bother putting in that huge amount of effort when they're not even trying? :/ But I have to, cos I have no other friends, and if I stopped initiating the contact with the people I currently know, I'd talk to basically no one

The whole "why should I bother?" thing has been coming up in my mind a lot too. I have a need for connectedness, but I also feel so hurt by people not putting in effort that it doesn't seem worth it sometimes.

EXACTLY how I feel. I know some Aspies really value being alone and enjoy it etc. I can't cope with LONG interaction, but I really want to feel connected to people. I don't ever want to use my Asperger's as an excuse for anything, and I don't want to be pitied, but sometimes I really want people to acknowledge that I have to work SO hard to even talk to them. I know I'm easily hurt, so I try not to react until it's been happening for a while so I don't make snap judgements, but it happens with every single person I know I don't feel like I've got any friends who would actually text if they hadn't heard from me for a while :/

I used to get that, but when I had my first breakup (she emotionally cheated and left me for my friend) my friends started texting me asking if I was alright, and that if I needed it I could talk about it with them. And when I deactivated Facebook a couple of months ago, I got texts asking why. So basically I found that during my bad times or when something changed my friends were there so never worried after that.

I feel pretty much the same way as you do. Some of my friends do not reciprocate. I am always the one to contact them to do things/chat. I don't even a "Hey how are you doing today?" or a "Want to chat?" or even life updates through text/email from them. I am interested in how they're doing, them as people, which is why I call them my friends but they aren't interested in me apparently. The way I see it is if you do not want me around or care, you won't try to talk and hangout with me then. This is pretty much the consensus for friendship so I don't think this is blowing many minds by saying it. I feel like why should I bother too. It's no good feeling confused by those who claim they are my friend but don't act like it unless I'm the one trying to make everything work. A little bit of care, that's all I ask for.