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Mitrovah
Deinonychus
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17 Mar 2014, 7:25 pm

I just recently turned down an offer from a friend of one my roommates to go to a St.Patrick music show. it will start in 1 1/2 hour central time. At first I was so afraid and hesitant so I sort of made up an excuse, doctor's appointment. but now I feel like so depressed about the fact I turned him down because I was afraid and Now I really want to go because I realize I am just keeping myself "shut in" I want to go and If I meet him I will say decided to "forget the appointment" Should I go and secondly will my excuse for my other excuse work?



starkid
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17 Mar 2014, 7:49 pm

Don't spin a web of lies, whatever you do. If you decide to go, tell your friend that you got nervous and blurted out a stupid excuse. If you are worried about your friend being angry about the lie, try to be casual and self-deprecating about it.



Mitrovah
Deinonychus
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17 Mar 2014, 7:57 pm

he is not a friend per se. he someone who knows both of my roommates. I freaked out at first when he asked because I went to one of those places before and didn't really enjoy it. I think im going to stick with not going anyway. I hate where I live, there is nothing to do but go to bars and I have no real interest in going to music venues unless it is someone I have heard before. I can't even hear the music it it soo Loud. I honestly do not have a clue how people socialize. All I know is how to watch movies read books and just do random things.



em_tsuj
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17 Mar 2014, 9:07 pm

I can relate to being isolated and automatically rejecting social invitations. I can relate to the fear and the regret. If you do change your mind, just say, "I changed my mind." Don't get too specific. If you tell him you made up an excuse, it is going to hurt his feelings and make him mad. If you don't think you will have a good time, don't go. That's my opinion.



Mitrovah
Deinonychus
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17 Mar 2014, 9:20 pm

thanks everyone but I decided not to go, it is not "in me" to go to places like that. I actually started feeling better about my decision about an hour later which is right about now. :lol: The problem is I have yet to find friends that share my interests, personality quirks and so forth. The problem is "Going out" in Iowa city is essentially going to bars and strictly music that is it. It's not movie theaters, museums, parks really or even odd out of the way places where I can wander around with friends doing random stuff like as aimless slackers which I used to do in high school. It is a tiny cramped downtown where you can't throw a ball in any direction without hitting a bar. I wish I had a long list of friends and connections but I don't but I'm getting there so long as I keep living with roommates



AardvarkGoodSwimmer
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17 Mar 2014, 9:33 pm

It's a tough one. I don't like being stuck someplace where there's sensory overload issues. Nor do I like being stuck where the social goes awkward, say where I'm being treated like a third wheel.