Does anyone else have trouble answering "what's up?&quo

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I know this is strange but I always feel awkward when people ask me that. Do I be honest and tell them my life is really boring and uninteresting so nothing is goin on, just say hi, ask them the same, just say not much, or what? I know this is really weird but when people ask me that there's always a pause then I'm just like....nothing. One time I thought I'd be sarcastic when I was in the cafeteria one day and said "Oh, I'm just sailing the Pacific Ocean with my hoes" when I was just sitting there. It made the situation even more awkward. Hey, I thought it was pretty funny. Same when I'm in a chat room even...well, obviously I'm on the internet talking to you, that's what's up. I want to sound like a jerk but I just honestly don't know how to respond to this simple question. It's very awkward for me, even more than other social situations. Am I the only one?

yeah, well in spanish you say "hola, como estas?" (hi, how are you?)
so I will often reply "parado" or "sentado" (standing up or sitting down)
hey thats the way I am XD

I feel frustrated with idle chatter, too at times-- I often force myself to "be nice" and say something short and reciprocate. I know its the game but it does feel so pointless at times.

I have to answer the phone at work at times and callers always want to ask me how I am, when all I want to say is: "You interrupted my train of thought with your call-- get to the point, will you, so I can transfer you and be done with you!" Horrible, I know-- but honestly how I feel at times, particularly if a project is frustrating me.

Its annoying when people ask, so I say "do you really want to know", or "do you want the long version or short version"

Sometimes people will ask me how I am and I'll say "I don't know!" 'Cause I really don't...