why do gay men act like women and gay women act like men?



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loftyD
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Fri Feb 11, 2011 7:15 am

why do gay men act like women and gay women act like men?

Surely if you are a gay man, you will be macho and love men and if you are a gay woman you will be really girly and love woman? My logic cannot grasp this at all.

Why the complete gender acting f*ckup... Is it just a social thing that LGB persons do... Please tell me!



imbatshitcrazy
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Fri Feb 11, 2011 7:31 am

probably a hormone inbalance. probably the guys have a lot of estrogen, and the girls have a lot of testosterone



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Fri Feb 11, 2011 7:32 am

Well apart from the fact that not all gay men act like women and not all gay women act like men... Why not?
Some straight men are feminine, some straight women are masculine...
Some gay women are feminine and like masculine women and some are feminine and like feminine women...
Some gay women are masculine and like masculine and some are masculine and like feminine
Same goes for gay men...
People act the way they feel comfortable and love what attracts them.
How hard is that to understand?


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loftyD
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Fri Feb 11, 2011 7:36 am

interesting, I find it funny though even though I am bi, I find it very odd.... Maybe because I have equal testosterone and equal oestrogen...

But then again, if autism is meant to be too much testosterone and being a male gay is less testosterone, being gay and autistic is impossible hahaha [according to that male brain theory thing]



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Fri Feb 11, 2011 7:40 am

There are lots of gay men who are very masculine but are just more in touch with their feminine side than straight men, if that makes sense. Just because lots of gay men might take a lot of time with their appearance and have somewhat high-pitched voices does not mean that they're 100% feminine.


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Fri Feb 11, 2011 10:24 am

Because many gay men have feminized brains, and many gay women have masculinized brains. Think of it this way. In any relationship, one person has to be more dominant, and one person has to be more submissive. Occasionally you will find couples that are equal, or that switch equally, but for the most part, there is one dominant alpha partner and one beta submissive partner. In most heterosexual relationships, the man is the dominant, and the female is the submissive. Today, that is becoming less common, although it is still the norm. (although that's because society is becoming more feminized in a lot of ways, not just entertainment, but school and the workplace as well) In homosexual relationships, it's no different. One partner is dominant, and one partner is submissive. So two dominant partners won't work any more than it would for heterosexuals. Occasionally, you will have extremely girly men, because you also have extremely macho guys to go along with it, and the same with butch lesbians and girly lesbians.

We only seem to notice the girly men and the butch women because they immediately stand out as gay, or perceived to be gay, whereas the other extreme usually passes for straight. If you've met as many gay men and women as I have, you might notice the same thing that I did, which is that most gay people blend in. Or maybe that's just a personal observation from my small sample size.



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Fri Feb 11, 2011 10:46 am

what is the difference between folks who are trapped in an undesired gender-body from birth, but who still prefer pairing with the same physical gender as their present [pre-sex-reassignment surgery] gender-- and those folks who simply are homosexual, aside from the former folks' wish to transform into the opposite gender?



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Fri Feb 11, 2011 11:28 am

Wow talk about ignorance. Gay men do not act like women. While there are some that are more on the femme part of the butch-femme spectrum, most gay guys are kind of umm, masculine, almost to an extreme. Ever met a bear? I have. Case closed. Most gay men do not even like the more femme men.

Lesbians and queer women run the gambit, but from my experience most identify as andro or femme on the butch-femme spectrum. Most gay women act like women, but not necessarily straight women. Butches are a minority of the community.

Butch-Femme is a gender expression continium. Truth be told people have mistaken ideas of gays and lesbians because they are based on stereotypes, and not actual people. Most people who are LGBT fly under your radar. People only see the folks that don't call attention.

I can't believe this type of ignorance is still out there.



Mar1976
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Fri Feb 11, 2011 12:17 pm

Rat_Barzane wrote:
Well apart from the fact that not all gay men act like women and not all gay women act like men... Why not?
Some straight men are feminine, some straight women are masculine...
Some gay women are feminine and like masculine women and some are feminine and like feminine women...
Some gay women are masculine and like masculine and some are masculine and like feminine
Same goes for gay men...
People act the way they feel comfortable and love what attracts them.
How hard is that to understand?


Exactly!
Perhaps you've mainly come across many of the stereotypical gay men and women and have associated that with ALL gay men and women? But it's not the case.
Perhaps there are many people you have assumed are straight because of the way they act, but they are actually gay and vice versa.

So, if you believe that to be the case for gay men and women; what do bi men and women act like? There must be a 'type' for bisexuals if you believe there is one for gay men and women...



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Fri Feb 11, 2011 5:39 pm

starygrrl wrote:
Ever met a bear? I have. Case closed.


Er, no, not based on that. You're doing exactally what the OP did to offend you - generalizing. Most gay men (besides bears, cubs and maybe chasers) would be offended to have bears put forward as the yardstick for gay men. Most don't act like women as such but you can't use the same tactics as you're opposing to win you're arguement.

As others have said, the general impression is as it is because you don't notice the LGB people who don't act stereotypically, I personally don't have bad gaydar for a straight guy and have seen many 'ordinary' LGB people.

I do struggle to understand people who are attracted to women going for masculine women and the same with people attracted to men who go for feminine men but it does happen in hetro situations too.



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Fri Feb 11, 2011 6:13 pm

This thread is overflowing with ignorance.



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Sat Feb 12, 2011 8:15 am

YourMother wrote:
This thread is overflowing with ignorance.


then kindly enlighten us, won't you please?



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Sat Feb 12, 2011 8:22 am

I do not know about "some, most or all" kinds of stats here, but I do know I have known both gay women and gay men I would never have known were gay unless one of them or someone else had told me ... and that was once quite embarrassing, but then she was quite kind and let me know in a gentle way.


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Sat Feb 12, 2011 9:48 am

loftyD wrote:
why do gay men act like women and gay women act like men?

Surely if you are a gay man, you will be macho and love men and if you are a gay woman you will be really girly and love woman? My logic cannot grasp this at all.

Why the complete gender acting f*ckup... Is it just a social thing that LGB persons do... Please tell me!


I like (find attractive) men, and I'm not macho, nor are the men I find attractive. So why should a man who likes men have to be macho and/or find macho men attractive? Doesn't seem to me that they should anymore than female me.

Although, some of them I'm sure are macho, and some of them like macho men.

Gay men,and lesbian women who act typical for their gender, most of the time, you aren't going to know that they are homosexual, since they aren't acting any different than anyone else.


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imbatshitcrazy
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Thu Feb 17, 2011 6:54 am

guys, he's just confused about stereotypical gay guys/women acting the way they do



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