Falling in love?
What? I thought it would be the other way around! It's always the same with this forum - one minute Aspies are the ones doing one thing, the next minute NTs are the ones who do that. When I talk to most NTs, they claim that they love someone from the internet who they've never even met, or if they have just met someone just for a day they seem to think they're head-over-hills in love. With me, it takes time, I need to know a man properly before I can actually fall in love. I may develop crushes on men and think I love them and want to be with them, but first I do want to get to know them so I can build up more secure feelings.
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Female
I don't know... I am unsure that anyone could tell someone what "love" really feels like. For me it's a combination of extreme feelings and sensations that are beyond my usual obsession. Granted most new things occupy my entire mind much like a new woman does, but the love distinction usually comes after that initial enamorment phase.
Then again I have been told that I move far too quickly in relationships so perhaps I need to work on holding back a little. Good luck with that.
I don't know... I am unsure that anyone could tell someone what "love" really feels like. For me it's a combination of extreme feelings and sensations that are beyond my usual obsession. Granted most new things occupy my entire mind much like a new woman does, but the love distinction usually comes after that initial enamorment phase.
Then again I have been told that I move far too quickly in relationships so perhaps I need to work on holding back a little. Good luck with that.
yeah this is kinda the same for me.
i've never been in a relationship, but i had a close friendship that was pretty much the same - maybe not to her but i liked her and i spent more and more time with her. i hung on every word she said, i noticed the little habits she had that were cute, and being around her was unusual. it was like i was actually connected to another person in a way that i've never felt. you know when your around people but you don't FEEL it? theres no real happiness there, no warm feeling of knowing someone cares? she gave me that. Slowly i began to become obsessed with her, and being around her made everything seem brighter and more alive. i wanted to be there to protect her and look out for her.
i went from having a crush to being in love with her over the course of about 3 months
Fiz
Veteran
Joined: 29 Jan 2006
Age: 41
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,821
Location: Manchester, United Kingdom
If someone is really special to me, I tend to fall for them very easily. However, I don't show it too much nor do I move too quickly as I am a very cautious person owing to having been hurt in the past. In fact, I will tend to take a step back until that person turns round and says that they love me or want to take things further. I find then that my emotions or feelings do not become too compromised.
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The only person in the world that can truly make you happy is yourself.
When I was in HS, I tended to have these silly little crushes on this girl or that one..
But when I REALLY fell in love, I was totally unprepared for the intensity of it, aside from my very real problems even relating to someone of the opposite sex. It was extremely painful, to say the least...
Sincerely,
Matthew
It might have something to do with the fact that I was homeschooled throughout middle and high school, but the most I've ever felt towards ANYBODY is a mild crush (and she was 10 years my senior- people my own age interest me very little for the most part). I've been physically attracted to a lot of people, but I'm 22 and I have NO idea what falling in love must feel like. I feel like I'm a lot pickier than others. At the moment, although I'm a virgin and I'm not just a little curious what sex might be like, I would still rather wait until I found somebody I could seriously consider spending the rest of my life with. You know, no sex for sex sake. I'm just not socially dexterous enough for that sort of thing.
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