I stand alone
It's funny, because while I can identify with this, I feel it's a double-edged sword. Sometimes people feel they have THE answer, they believe they've got it, and they're not willing to listen to counter arguments. In that scenario, I usually just politely smile and nod, because I know it's futile to try to disagree with them. In their minds, I wonder if they think of me, "this guy is just like everyone else, he doesn't get IT like I do!"
So I try not to be smug and preachy about my beliefs, and keep my mind open that I could be wrong.
I've always enjoyed picking people's brains and trying to see how they think. On the whole though, I think people don't like having their beliefs challenged, especially if the belief is commonly held.
I'm not one to quote song lyrics, but this reminds my a lot of a Beach Boys song...not about cars, girls, or surfing:
And tell them the way that they live could be better?
I know there's an answer
I know now, but I have to find it by myself
I am not a very social person. But that just me.
I can't speak for the OP, but I don't think the question was about being popular or trying to fit in.
It's about a general disconnect felt just being around other people, seeing how different we are from them not only in how we act and behave, but in how they naturally act and behave.
goldfish21
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You are.
I understand completely Tequila, but my entire life has been this way. So I don't really feel any pain from it anymore. I'm consciously aware that no matter who I am with or where I am, I am alone.
Even if I feel like I care about people, they can't understand or see the world as I do. As bumble has suggested above, the world has gone insane; to try to explain this, or give someone a touch of sanity only serves to further alienate me.
For example, Monsanto has just received legal immunity from Obama, their GMO crops will take over the market soon (I'm not American but this still concerns me greatly as we are neighbors). No one really seems to care. No one cares that there's poison in the tap water, no one cares that technology is replacing human interaction, no one cares about anything anymore. There's no true religion, no philosophy, the western world is dying and I'm starting to understand exactly why so many people believe "America is Satan".
If I were to say that to the average person, what is their reaction?
In my eyes you have two options..
Accept that you're alone and try to find a small, small group of people that you can be around.
OR
Fake it, be fake. Even most NTs are not themselves in public, or with friends. I believe most aspies are even worse because they're aware they have to try to fake it.
However, I believe everyone is lacking introspection, they don't understand themselves let alone anyone else... The most important thing I can suggest is to understand yourself, whatever that means for you.
We are.
I hate Monsanto with a passion. The s**t they, and American business, government, FDA etc pull is beyond appalling. Sheople are far too busy being distracted by crap to realize they're being enslaved & poisoned. The Bilderbergers are in full swing on their plans of mass population reduction down to 500M people worldwide, and they're doing it via Monsanto, poisoning the food supply, land, air, sea, drinking water, pharmaceuticals, vaccinations etc w/ the cooperation of governments and the American military industrial complex. It's disgusting.
Thankfully we have the option of organic foods here, and our water hasn't been fluoridated since 1972. Now if we could only avoid the radiation from Fukushima... oh wait, we can't. f**k.
Anyways, I think there are a lot of us Aspies on the same wavelength about this sort of stuff. You're not alone in being able to stand on the outside of society and look in and see that from systems, processes, management, economics, environment, government & banking systems points of view people have completely lost touch with reality. Everyone going along with these absurd charades have lost their f00kin' minds.
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No for supporting trump. Because doing so is deplorable.
You feel like an alien? That's why they call this Wrong Planet. You feel the same exact way I've always felt. It's not easy, but it's part of being autistic. Try to have fun with it like Doctor Who has with the humans. Or pretend you're in the Matrix. Real life is like watching a TV show anyways, right?
Feel like this all the time, I've never really been attached to anyone or feel the need to.
I try to mingle with people in groups where interests are the same but always end up feeling like the odd one out and don't belong.
I have been a bit of loner for most of my life so i just keep telling myself its just my anxiety of just wanting to belong.
I've been told this quite often from NTs. My perception of the world and what is going on in my head is very different to what is going on in everyone else's head.
I don't think it's so much about being 'popular' as having people that you genuinely share an interest with rather than people that you occasionally have overlapping interests with, or the random people in the pub and so on and so forth. I can't really relate to the other people's experiences during this special interest, and when I am with these people I still feel very frozen out.
In many cases, I think I would actually prefer to watch some of my life experiences through a television screen rather than actually be there in real life, as I find that it's uncomfortable for me and I constantly feel not part of the group and a complete fraud.
I understand that, but it's a little more specific than just feeling as though you don't fit in. It feels as though you could be almost invisible, as though it's almost - almost - not you interacting with other people. It's as though you are not entirely there when you interact with strangers.
I have so often felt like I am invisible to the world. Not within my family or in a work situation, but outside I am the person salespeople do not try to sell to. I am the person at a party (and I am very rarely invited to parties) who no one talks to. I couldn't approach strangers and start talking and I find small talk difficult, so I tend to be the one who sits alone. This, of course, makes things worse as I am then seen as snobbish or aloof. I do not enjoy being like this though.
That souds very familiar to me,
I spend a lot of time alone, even on school Its a terrible feeling
I did manage to make some friendships but almost every time I fail to maintain them.
Also I where ignored by many classmates probably because I am a bid rude and maybe some noisy
It hurt my feeling to be ignored every day so I decided to stop with school and go in treatment
Im getting help but still feeling pretty much the same way...
Last edited by marinus on 31 Mar 2013, 4:43 am, edited 1 time in total.
I can relate. There have been times when i was in a group or even cluster of in-laws at holidays where i feel i am apart from everyone just existing there to observe them and that is all.
I do not identify with them, i am just there, i don't feel comfortable there.
I feel like a ghost who watches humans sometimes...
goldfish21
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In many cases, I think I would actually prefer to watch some of my life experiences through a television screen rather than actually be there in real life, as I find that it's uncomfortable for me and I constantly feel not part of the group and a complete fraud.
All a matter of perspective. If I'm feeling social anxiety, then yeah, I can feel like that.. But if I'm doin' alright, I'm still on the outside looking in, but with a different perspective. I'm constantly observing and analyzing everything and everyone from a 3rd party observer perspective. Its like being Neo and seeing The Matrix & operating inside it, but on our own path vs some predetermined program the masses seem to be controlled by, and it puts them in an enchated spell like trance, zombies, drones, borg, debt slaves, human matrix stylr batteries to charge the greed of banksters & corporate overlords, w/e you want to call them.. We get the opportunity to see it all from this outsiders perspective.
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No for supporting trump. Because doing so is deplorable.
I know the feeling well. It's like being in some kind of interactive television show or something. Like it's not 100% real. It seems artificial. Or worse, you seem artificial to yourself. That, at least to a degree, is depersonalization. Something I've suffered from off and on since childhood. Seems a lot of autistic people experience it. Maybe it just has to do with being out of your personal environment. I don't recall ever experiencing it at home. I just get it when I'm away from home. It's probably there all the time when I'm away from home, but is more pronounced sometimes than others. I know lack of sleep exacerbates it.
Being away from home... Meeting strangers... Welcome to the Matrix.
goldfish21
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I experienced some pretty extreme depersonalizaton when I was 17. I don't think what I described above is even mild dp. Its differentn much more positive.
Its as if the whole world's a stage, and like the lyrics from the Cold War Kids song, "..we are playing for an audience of one," and I am the one. Its a nice view.
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KTrLsteldvc[/youtube]
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No for supporting trump. Because doing so is deplorable.
Last edited by goldfish21 on 31 Mar 2013, 4:50 am, edited 1 time in total.