Being articulate and getting the right words out

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I have a lot of difficulty standing up for myself but its not due to low self esteem or being cowardly. I truly don't know how to explain and verbalized the thoughts, feelings, and ideas in my head articulately. Does anyone have any advice for how one can do this better. Also when you feel that someone is trying to bully/bellitle you or is lying to you what's the right way to call them out on their s**t and have them admit to it instead of denying, denying, denying? Because it seems like all people do is make up reasons for how they meant to say something differently.

you need to hang with a better class of people.

I don't know where to go or where to find a better class of people

I also have bipolar as well which for some reason seems to make everything feel twice as difficult to do, handle, or deal with.

I found my better class of people on meetup.com. I belong to the Olympia Square Pegs Aspie Meetup, I never met a group of finer folks than that.

*watches thread...*

I hear you J&S, and would also love to learn such skills. Even when I've got the time to type out a response, rather than verbalise something on the spot, I still struggle to articulate what I really mean, or to say things in a convincing yet non-aggressive/-manipulative/-deceptive way.

For me it's not so much about standing up for myself, but more about having deep discussions. I back out of "difficult" conversations simply because I don't know how to word my arguments.

you could compose it on an ipad or google tablet or such, then just have the other person read it or you could read it yourself. just a thought.

I know how you feel, I once attended a class by one of my favorite origami authors, who is also a retired laser physicist and made a gaffe that I regret. I stated that my origami dragonfly had a "belly button" due to a small stress rip in the paper, and he replied "Hmm, I have never heard of a dragonfly with a navel before" and realized that I used a childish word. He may not have intended it to bother me, but I was embarassed and it stuck with me. I also tend to be told that I am too wordy at times when dealing with the public, so audience is important to keep in mind when choosing which words to use.

^^^
sounds like that physicist mighta had a touch of the ol' AS himself.

I relate to the OP. My struggle with verbalizing my thoughts is the thing that lead me to believe that I have AS, and my biggest challenge. People think I'm shy, or don't socialize much because of nervousness, and that's not entirely untrue, but it's mainly because I can't find the words half the time!

I know what you guys mean - I am the most articulate person in the world... on paper. In real life, especially in confrontational situations, I stutter, trip over my words and am horrific at thinking on my feet. I will always think of something that I should have said, but only after I've collected my thoughts and the moment has long since passed.

Unfortunately, in regards to jerks that bully and taunt: there isn't much you can do. I found that calling people's bluff doesn't really accomplish anything except make the bullying worse. You are totally right when you say that people excuse harsh words and try to "cover it up". I loathe when people say something cruel and then backpeddle with "I was joking" - that is the total antithesis of humour! It's just a convenient excuse to be nasty!

The cheap advice that I could give you that I learned over time is to think for a moment before responding to people and gather your thoughts. I had the unfortunate habit of blurting out the first (usually nonsensical) thing that came to mind when I was in an awkward situation or didn't know what to say. Now, I find it easiest to just say nothing or think for a second before I spew something offensive. I also listen to what other people say in conversations and insert things that I've heard others say in situations that I'm not familiar with.

a very wise man [Benjamin Franklin, though victor borge made it rhyme] said words to the effect of "it is better to keep silent and as a fool be thought, than to open one's mouth and remove all doubt."

Mate, I had a driving charge unfairly filed against me because I didn't know how to articulate myself at the scene of the accident and during court.

I then heard about toastmasters a place where people practice speaking, and have found it has worked wonders in terms of saying what is on my mind.

Also, it helps to go out as often as you can and try different life experiences. That way you'll learn how to handle yourself better when people try and take advantage of you.

I still have a long way to go, but I have found doing these things have made life easier for me

I have found that I can articulate my thoughts way better in emails, which is what I use most of the time if I want to get my point across at work.

I have this problem too. I'm interested in trying out the neuroplasticity games you can now buy online and seeing how they help. I have noticed that being in a relaxed and positive mood helps make articulation less difficult. Taurine helps me also. As i have gotten older and been through more trials and tribulations, i have found that i am becoming lesd affected by these situations wherein there is bullying. Being lesd affected/ appearing more at ease keeps the bullies at bay usually. I have learned lately that some but not all NTs actually welcome borderline bullying/ razing to an extent. I have come to accept that this will just be a part of my dealings in life since I am an aspie. I am glad that I am an aspie and not at all like the ppl who so annoy/pester me. That would be sad..,to be one of them. I recently witnessed someone on the spectrum (very confident, well liked, established in the community) STILL get jabbed at by someone which then! quickly accelerated into pure harrassment. It just makes me prouder to be like the aspie and not like the jerk. I'm set apart. I think in pictures. I'm beautiful. I accept.