Work in friendships

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I was wondering if you guys have to "work" in friendships, and the person your friends with has to "work" too. I recently had a falling out with a friend and one of the things he said, "hes never had to work this hard in a friendship before". For most people, friendships just exist. For me, I've always had to "work" to some extent, majority of the time. So I talked to another friend and he said that people might not be used to having to work but thats the way things are with me. It just seems weird. That might just be the reality for me.

I've always had to work like crazy to form and maintain friendships, and even then not many are successful. The other person has to work quite a bit as well, because I don't often take the initiative on a lot of things.

As far as communication goes, a little bit is normal. People have to "work" at understanding their friend's perspective or understanding sensitivities.

I've had a few friendships that were a lot of work because the person was very demanding and easily upset. I decided it's just better for them to find others like themselves instead of molding me to the point that I'm no longer myself.