Have you ever had a guy or girl disappear on you?

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Have you ever had a guy or girl, be it they were someone you liked or even someone you were dating suddenly stop talking to you. Then when you try to ask what you did wrong or why they decided to cut you off they still ignore you? And if they did, did they suddenly re-appear in your life with some excuse? Share your stories.

I've stopped talking to people before, but it wasn't without numerous attempts to fix the problem, though. For someone to just disappear out of the blue for no reason, makes me think they are a littly flaky and uncaring.

I've had this happen to me before. The worst time was when I was a teenager, I had a huge crush on this guy and we were both interested in each other until he just stopped talking to me. It was painful to say the least. Having someone reject me to my face is a much better alternative then someone disappearing. I still never know what happened with that guy, almost 4 years later.

Not really, but I have disappeared on a girl quite a few times.

Could it be that they were in a relationship, and their partner doesn't want them talking to you?

Try this on for size:

My first date with guy back in college was at a drive-in theatre. He would excuse himself after about 10 minutes in the car, and walk to the concession stand, go inside and not return for 15 minutes. About two-thirds through the movie, he admitted that he had "mistakenly" scheduled another date with another guy who was parked on the opposite side of the concession stand. Mmm-hm! After that kind of behavior, I would have appreciated having him just disappear.

It is very painful. And what I don't understand is why they refuse to give an excuse. Usually when I want to stop talking to someone it is because they did something awful to me like humiliate me. I always tell them though that I will stop talking to them.

Why did you?

The last girl I talked to did this to me. It was devastating. I thought she at least owed me an explanation. It's been over a year and I still think about her a lot and miss her. There is no closure.

Some people are not able to have those difficult conversations. It just is what it is. I am the exact opposite. I go into extreme detail laying out why I am ending the relationship. However, some people don't want to hear all the details. They don't care why.

Dating sucks.

I don't tnink it counts as "disappearing" if you've been on a few dates with a person and they don't return your call -- that's, well, dating. Guys I never exclusively dated? Aren't owed explanations. The non-return of a phone call is, in and of itself, the message.

A few girls from high school stopped speaking to me after college -- and eventually tried to get back in touch a few years later, by which point I was no longer interested. I run into them in occasion (still have a few friends in common), am happy to exchange pleasantries but that's it.

I guess to specify I mostly mean someone you were close to. Then one day without reason they just begin ignoring you.

Yes, quite a few times. But I've done it to people as well.

That would be what happened with a those girls I was friends with in high school -- and, yes, it hurt like hell at the time.

However, with time and distance, I realised I hadn't actually been close to those girls in at least four years -- I just sort of failed to notice because I had 1) been living out of the country for 4+ yrs, 2) came home only once or twice a year and tended to see them in a big group with lots of others and 3) really only exchanged the odd email and birthday card w/them
During that time. When I moved back to my hometown and they stopped returning my calls? THAT is when I noticed and it hurt.

My ex-GF Katrina, and I knew each other when we were kids. When we began middle school, I learned she moved to Seattle with her family. I never thought of her much over time, but in late 2011, I received a message on my old Facebook account from someone claiming to be her. At first, I thought it was a joke, but after asking her if she was real, she sent me two pics of herself; one from childhood and one from 2011. She was telling the truth and asked if we could meet at a free advance Portland screening of Mission Impossible 4. After the screening, I thought she stood me up, but after having a fun conversation with one of the actors, she tapped me on the shoulder and politely said to the actor I was talking to "Sir, I need to talk to this guy." So we did. Katrina told me that she had moved back to Portland with her family to try to start college because Seattle was too expensive. We dated on and off for about 18 months.

In Summer 2013, I learned Katrina was cheating on me, so not only this led to the breakup, but because of issues in my family, I had no choice but to break up with Katrina. However, I wasn't surprised that she took the breakup lightly.

Yeah, there was one girl I really liked in grad school. Met her in a bar one night and we ended up making out and such, and she gave me her phone number. Before this I used to see her around campus quite a bit. It turned out she gave me a bad phone number, and didn't see her around the psych building any more like I often did before. Finally she called me one afternoon and said she didn't want to see me anymore.

I went to the bar that night and downed 4 shots of Jagermeister before I even found a seat. Somehow I did manage to make it to my 9am stats class the next morning.

Hurt bad at the time. Not sure what caused the sudden disappearance and all. This was one girl I really found attractive. Guess I will never know what happened, but I wish she could see where I am now and what she missed out on!

Can I speculate? I think they do care, but imagine yourself sitting there and hearing your gf/bf criticizing you and listing out every single reason for why he/she is breaking up with you. Breakup conversations are often difficult to listen to, but it's not necessary to nitpick at every minute detail. You mentioned that you go into "extreme detail"...is it possible that you may be keeping tabs on certain things (eg. the things she does that you don't like) and basically, compiling a case against your relationship, when in reality, your relationship may have lasted if you had decided to just let some things go?

It's the only magic trick I'm good at.