Should I feel threatened?

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This isn't exactly closely related to Asperger's, but I do tend to have a hard time in judging whether I should feel threatened or if I'm just over reacting, well here's my situation and please tell me what you think in regards to taking action, if I should, and what that action might be.

I am seventeen and I am a frequent babysitter, but a lot of my kids were growing up and work was growing thin so I ran an add (as many many people do in my small town) with a photo, a little about me, and my phone number. Well, two days later I got an extremely strange phone call that lasted about seven minutes and went something as follows:

I answer the phone and say, "Hello".

This really strange sounding boy (I guessed he was either hitting puberty or was ret*d) asked, "Can I talk to Miss Ellen?"

I thought it was weird he called me "Miss", but I said, "This is Ellen."

He said, "I'm calling because of a babysitting add."

"okay"

"Well actually I'm calling for my Mom. This is actually her work number I'm calling from and she said that it might not show up so I'm supposed to give you her cell number so you can call her direct. Do you have a pen?"

"Yes, it didn't show up and yes I have a pen."

He gives me the number, but it doesn't have enough numbers in it to be a real number, but before i can ask him about it he launches off again.

"My Mom is actually right here with me, but she is making me call...(off the phone he groans, "Mooooom")...because she says I need to take responsiblities for my actions, for my bad behavior. She was wondering if you have a minute so that I can explain our unique situation. Do you have a minute?"

I said, "Yes, I have a minute," this may sound stupid and niave of me, but I think having Asperger's makes my heart goes out to any undiagnosed neurological problems and I'm also still thinking he's a young teen or ret*d.

"My Mom is willing to offer you twenty dollars an hour if you think you can help me, she is looking for a possitive role model and someone who can be an authority figure to me. She says I need to learn to respect authority and I need a strong possitive role model. She told me to tell you not to tell me your age until we're done talking, for obvious reasons, but do you think you'd be able to help me?"

"I think I need to talk to your Mom," I said.

"Well she wants me to tell you a few things. She wants to know if you have experience with infants because that's the level of maturity I have is that of an infant. So she wants me to ask you... (again, off the phone moaning, "mooooom")...if you have experience with infants."

At this point he's sounding very upset like he's crying or about to. At the very least he sounds extremely embarressed. I say (laughing because I was beginning to get very nervous and unsure how to respond), "Yeah, I guess I have experience with infants."

"She wants me to also tell you...to point out...(off phone, "Mom, uh!")...that I have been taken out of my high school because I have been acting out for attention. I've been having bad behavior for negative attention and now I'm spending my days at Ready Rainbow Day Care to be among my peers."

Again he's sounding very upset, so I just say, "Ooookay."

"Well what happened, well, the latest thing that happened was I was in a cool down and I acted out for negative attention. I had an accident in my pants for negative attention and so that's what happened."

"Ooookay."

"And well, do you have any specific questions for me now that I've told you?"

"Can I talk to your mother?"

"Well actually I want to ask, I would like to ask, I have a few questions for you now, if that's okay."

"Yeah, I guess it's okay," I'm about to hang up because I'm thinking this could go in a weird direction.

"Well do you think you could help me?"

"Maybe, I guess so."

Off the phone he says, "Yes, Mom"

To me he says, "Well, like, do you have to always listen to my Mom?" He's completely whining now, like two year old whining.

"Well, I guess I would listen to what your Mom has to say first about your behavior."

"Well I mean do you always do what she says or do you, like, do your own thing?"

"I guess if I was alone with you I would have to use my own judgment, can I please talk to your Mom?"

"Well how do you handle discipline do you do like cool downs?"

"I guess I would talk to your Mom about that."

"Well do you do cool downs and paddlings. That's what my Mom...does is cool downs and paddlings. You don't do paddlings do you? Do you do paddlings? Do you do paddlings?"

"No, can I talk to your Mom?"

"Also now, I was wondering, could you tell me, how old you are?"

"I'm seventeen."

"What? Uh? What?"

"I'm seventeen," I said slowly.

"Well, uh, Do you like go to my school, do you go to my school?"

"No, I don't go to your school."

"Well do you think you can help me or not?"

"Possibly, can I talk to your Mom."

"Well, can I just tell her that you can't do it? Can I just say that you can't do it?"

"Can I talk to your Mom?"

"Well, uh, well, uh, can't I just tell her you can't do it?"

Angirly I said, "Is your Mom even there?"

"Yes, she's right here.'

"Can I please talk to her?"

"Ye-, uh, fine!"

I didn't hear anything for a few seconds and then he hung up.


Okay, so I'm wondering what in the world was the motivation behind this call. Was it real? A prank? Someone who just saw my picture and wanted to talk to me?

Usually if it was a prank he would be laughing and/or there would be people in the background laughing, but I never heard any background noise at all. If it was real than why was he able to tell me to just say I couldn't do it if his Mom was standing right there?

I am very worried that this person may be highly unstable especially because he kept talking to a "mother" that I never heard a single word from and it was extremely convincing.

So, sorry so long, but does anyone have any thoughts on this?

Sounded like some guy who is an adult baby or teen baby (if he is still a teen) and he likes being taken care of and he hung up because he knew he wouldn't be able to go any further until you spoke to his mother. That's my guess.

I don't know about feeling threatened, since he hung up on you. If you hear from him again call the police. Did he seem to lose interest in you when he found out you're only seventeen?

You say that in your town people put their pics in the paper - could you call others like yourself and ask if he called them too?

It occurs to me that maybe if you tell the police about it, they might say, "Oh yeah we know about him" which would be a load off. Any time you don't know whether you are being threatened is a good time to call the police.

No, he didn't seem to lose interest, but he seemed more nervous. However, if he read the add himself than he would have all ready known that I was a junior in high school.

I'm not sure I want to talk to the police or anyone else yet, because he was so convincing that I'm not entirely sure that he might not be schizophrenic or ret*d, which actually may be a good reason to call the police...

I don't know.

Goodness. That's odd. I used to be a tutor, and had some strange ones sometimes, but that is very odd.

I personally would do nothing and hope they never ring back.

If it is a bona fide babysitting enquiry, I woulnd't take on that job. It sounds like he'd be a LOT of work and probably need someone with more specialist skills than you could be expected to provide. If you're seventeen, you'd also have to consider your physical ability to cope with a teen or adult with special needs - he could be bigger and stronger than you.

If you get another strange call, and you think it's someone being funny, you can take it further. The law varies depending on where you are, but it's called something like 'using a telecommunications carrier to harrass or threaten'.

Good luck.

He sounds like a nut case. Don't ever speak to him again. He could be a stalker.

It sounds like either:

a) The guy is mentally ret*d or insane

b) There really is a mother there and she is forcing her child to make this phone call as a form of emotional abuse, to humiliate him. I've seen things like that happen, believe it or not.

c) Some combination of the above,

or

d) It's a prank call from a really good actor who has a very bizarre sense of what makes a good prank

That guy is either mentally disturbed, some kind of pervert, or both. Don't even go there.

I know NT kids used to go through a stage where they would make prank calls, but nothing so elaborate. My own feeling would be someone knows you are an Aspie and is messing with you after seeing something on Autism. Hence all the strange questions. When you didn't get it and were sincere, they gave up. That's my take. It may be completely wrong.

Regardless, do not pursue this or talk to this kid if he calls back. Babysitter 101 - only talk to the parent.

I don't believe he will hurt you, but try not to be alone for awhile just in case.

Even on the off chance that everything is as represented, I wouldn't want to work for the kind of parent that would do this to their child.

Maybe too you should take your photo off the ad. Did you talk to your parent/s about it?

Next time he calls yes, just hang up.

Thanks for everybody's replies.

Yes, my parents do know about it and my email instead of my phone number is now run in my ads.

I don't think anyone would know that I have asperger's. Unless they were on this website or are in my immediate family, i don't see how they would have found out, but I too was thinking at first that this may have something more personal in it than just a prank call.

It would be an extremely elaborate prank, especially in pretending there's a mother and that he's talking to her off the phone. It's possible that the mother truly was making him do it, but then how was he able to ask me to say I couldn't do it? His speech seemed a little strange, high pitched and a little scatter-brained, so I just don't know what to think.

I am being careful though and I have a big dog that follows me around everywhere so that would be pretty intimidating to anyone who came around uninvited.

I think the email address is a good idea. Hopefully it won't happen again...good luck with your babysitting

I also have a German Shepherd that follows me everywhere and for the same reason. I think some of us just attract strange men because we are in our heads so much they realize we are unaware. I'm glad you have the dog. Just be careful.

That sounds very creepy indeed. While it might be some moron taking the piss I'd be very vigilant for a good while. He could find you and rape you or anything.