Friend in need

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A friend is going through a very hard time. How do I support her without being a doormat?

Yesterday I yelled back at her and told her that I'm always happy to help her but that I won't tolerate her yelling only at me (she doesn't yell at anyone else) and that I won't agree to picking up very big bills she dumps on me (she doesn't do this to others who have a lot of money, and I'm very poor).

Now she's angry and won't contact me, not even to ask for anything, so I come out to everyone as the one who isn't at her side in these tough times, and everyone is angry at me.

Based on what you posted, she sounds like a user and an abuser and you weren't about to take it from her anymore. The reason why she is ignoring you is that she felt insulted. Why? You gave her a taste of her own medicine and she didn't like it one bit. You did the right thing in putting your foot down with her and I would too.

In terms of people getting angry with you for putting your foot down, it doesn't matter how they feel. It only matters how you feel.

Thank you, summer twilight. Your words are very important to me because I'm surrounded only by her people, who are not neutral and make me feel guilty.

Her people sound toxic and people who you don't want around. What have you done to get yourself away from them and cut ties?

Also, what about looking at taking some assertive training and setting boundaries with these people? You can't keep walking on eggshells around them.

You need to take a good look at yourself. Learn to stop yelling, most likely you have done this sort of thing most of you life.

Moondust, it sounds like she is dumping this on you because she thinks you are gullible and so do the rest of her "Friends" and family who are picking on you.

Yes, they absolutely believe I'm gullible. And I am, to a certain extent. They also know I'm alone and punish the slave's rebellion by ignoring me, hoping I'll be desperate enough for human contact to do anything she wants.

It's time to let this whole group go being that this is a toxic set of relationships who will only bring you down. They aren't worthy of you or your time. It's time to meet new friends elsewhere who aren't users and abusers like that.