The Narcissist’s Kindness is not genuine

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Beware of being date-tricked Wong Planeteers!

There are more Aspies being gullibly tricked than Neurotypicals.

Have you been on dates with partners who you felt so convinced they were sincere and then only later found out they lied, cheated, or stole. Tell us your experiences

- Have they love bombed you?
- Looked at themselves in the mirror frequently?
- Made excuses that don’t add up?
- Isolated you from your own family?

Said she was over ten years younger than she was!

No, but I had a crush on a covert narcissist for many years who also had an autism diagnosis. Though we did not date, he manage to make me believe that he liked me when he didn't.

1. He would love to bomb me by flirting with me and acting like he was interested in me for months at a time

2. He would gaslight me by using those love-bombing episodes and then would completely ignore me and smile at me. Ignore me and act like he was mad that I was around. Then he told me that he didn't have feelings for me but I called him out, only to be told that I jump to conclusions.

3. He would play the victim by telling people that couldn't be a mechanical engineer because he was too autistic to pass a job interview.

4. He went behind my back and complained to other people about how I was a stupid spazz because I didn't talk about geeky things 24/7 and I could not answer his tough questions

5. He told me that I had to impress him with my level of intelligence just to prove that I was good enough for him and often blindsided me with condescending questions in which I would freeze.

6. He was very self-centered and had no consideration for other people

7. I invited him to celebrate my birthday which took place at an autism-related adult event. However, he didn't bother to get me a card or acknowledge me. Instead, he talked to another girl right in front of me who he was more interested in,

Hi summer,

Just keep in mind that in all theses cases Aspies are different from not. They don’t realize they r hurting you. But the guy u were talking about reminds me of myself. Misunderstood but kind. Perceived as a narc

Hope that helps

Thanks for your input, he was clueless to a degree but he knew how to flirt with women and pit them against each other. In fact, he did this to another woman and me who were friends at the time. Meanwhile, he kept leading us both around.

He was also very grandiose in thinking that he was entitled to the same respect as Albert Einstein and Temple Grandin. However, he didn't have much going for himself, and nor did he make any effort. For example, he slept during the day and stayed up all night playing D&D and watching cartoons.

He would also constantly brag about how smart he really was too.

Hi Summer,

Sounds in this case like a real full blown narcissist and not an Aspie with narcissist tendencies, especially when you mentioned he makes no effort.

True genuine is when a partner consistently keeps you happy and never makes you feel sad or uncomfortable (except in exceptional and obviously stressful circumstances such as when you intentionally put them in an unusually unhappy situation) and consistently spends time with you (I don't mean everyday) but does not abandon you unexplainably either. They are understanding and don't necessary strive to look their best constantly and look at themselves in the mirror constantly.

Hope that helps

Anyone in shock by a narc who seemed sooo genuinly kind and then suddenly dumped you?

Tell me your story.

^ Why?

Last bumped by knowingtheautist on 14 Aug 2023, 6:08 pm.