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__Elijahahahaho
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19 Mar 2024, 4:23 pm

I went to a movie club to try meet some folks.
Chatted with a woman there about travels.
A guy enters and sits quietly next to us, I try to bring him into the conversation by asking a related question about his travels.

The guy ignores me completely and starts his own conversation with the girl in a different language
so I cannot be part of it.

This isn't the first time, there are some complete as*holes here.
I feel like s**t.

They didn't know each other, he was just being completely selfish.



cyberdad
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19 Mar 2024, 5:05 pm

Welcome to the real world. I did group social dating 1-2 times and found the men to be super-competitive while the girls just sit their enjoying all the attention they are getting. Not a great experience.



__Elijahahahaho
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19 Mar 2024, 5:14 pm

cyberdad wrote:
Welcome to the real world. I did group social dating 1-2 times and found the men to be super-competitive while the girls just sit their enjoying all the attention they are getting. Not a great experience.


sigh...

There wasn't even romantic element since the girl was taken and the guy was too old.
I think he was just an as*hole, or slightly nationalist or maybe racist.



DanielW
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19 Mar 2024, 5:48 pm

__Elijahahahaho wrote:
cyberdad wrote:
Welcome to the real world. I did group social dating 1-2 times and found the men to be super-competitive while the girls just sit their enjoying all the attention they are getting. Not a great experience.


sigh...

There wasn't even romantic element since the girl was taken and the guy was too old.
I think he was just an as*hole, or slightly nationalist or maybe racist.


He could have misunderstood your comment, Not spoken the language well, just been a jerk or any number of things - there is no reason you need to take it personally - especially when he didn't make any negative comments directly to you. Part of learning to socialize is knowing that not every interaction is going to be positive. You can't control other people, but you can control your reactions to them.

Keep it up, the more practice you get (positive or negative) the better you will be at it. :-)



cyberdad
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19 Mar 2024, 8:47 pm

__Elijahahahaho wrote:
cyberdad wrote:
Welcome to the real world. I did group social dating 1-2 times and found the men to be super-competitive while the girls just sit their enjoying all the attention they are getting. Not a great experience.


sigh...

There wasn't even romantic element since the girl was taken and the guy was too old.
I think he was just an as*hole, or slightly nationalist or maybe racist.


This is a movie club? same issues. People ultimately want attention. I've been to book clubs and even a Egyptological society club and people are all in cliques. But...if you are keen on the concept then just be cool about it and let things flow.



cyberdad
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19 Mar 2024, 8:48 pm

DanielW wrote:
__Elijahahahaho wrote:
cyberdad wrote:
Welcome to the real world. I did group social dating 1-2 times and found the men to be super-competitive while the girls just sit their enjoying all the attention they are getting. Not a great experience.


sigh...

There wasn't even romantic element since the girl was taken and the guy was too old.
I think he was just an as*hole, or slightly nationalist or maybe racist.


He could have misunderstood your comment, Not spoken the language well, just been a jerk or any number of things - there is no reason you need to take it personally - especially when he didn't make any negative comments directly to you. Part of learning to socialize is knowing that not every interaction is going to be positive. You can't control other people, but you can control your reactions to them.

Keep it up, the more practice you get (positive or negative) the better you will be at it. :-)


Nah...he was a dickhead



Fnord
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19 Mar 2024, 9:18 pm

The man was a jerk, and the girl not much better for failing to stick up for you.

It happens.

It also happens that, in some cases, the girl accuses the first man of being rude to her, and the second man threatens to teach the first man a lesson.

Then the girl says something like "Settle our bar tabs instead and then get the hell out".

Sometimes people work together to cadge free drinks and screw over a stranger.

(Advice from a former sailor who has visited many foreign ports.)


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cyberdad
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19 Mar 2024, 10:10 pm

Fnord wrote:
The man was a jerk, and the girl not much better for failing to stick up for you.

It happens.

It also happens that, in some cases, the girl accuses the first man of being rude to her, and the second man threatens to teach the first man a lesson.

Then the girl says something like "Settle our bar tabs instead and then get the hell out".

Sometimes people work together to cadge free drinks and screw over a stranger.

(Advice from a former sailor who has visited many foreign ports.)


^^^ Agree with this



__Elijahahahaho
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20 Mar 2024, 1:50 pm

Thanks for the validation team.



Summer_Twilight
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09 Apr 2024, 10:57 am

This one is so triggering...

One time while having a conversation with someone, another woman pulled her away from me. However, she felt threatened by me. There were lots of times when she would get upset whenever some of her other friends wanted to sit with me.



__Elijahahahaho
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09 Apr 2024, 11:11 am

Summer_Twilight wrote:
This one is so triggering...

One time while having a conversation with someone, another woman pulled her away from me. However, she felt threatened by me. There were lots of times when she would get upset whenever some of her other friends wanted to sit with me.


This sounds really immature.

In my case it was even more annoying because I usually don't have the wherewithall to bring others into the conversation
so I thought I was doing well.

Why do I bother. I need to be more selfish.