hello

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i joined a few months ago but didn't really have the courage to post here until just now. i just became aware of my autism over the past year or so. many of my friendships have inevitably crumbled over the years and my drug abuse opened my eyes to how i was not like others. since i was a child people have pointed out the weird ways in which i do things and how i'm unable to filter out the inappropriate conversation topics. yet i am smart enough to catch the moments in which my social awkwardness has caused people to exchange looks or create uncomfortable silences. i am a female so i think that's why my behavior has gone unnoticed for so long. that, and because the parent who raised me has narcissistic personality disorder. anyway, i look forward to getting to know you all and to perhaps take comfort in solidarity.

*i apologize for the lack of capitalized sentences. i'm one of those people who find having to press the shift key at the start of every sentence frustrating. i know that this may be a pet peeve for some people.

Welcome to the Planet! Make yourself at home with us.

thank you

i also rarely use the shift key. welcome.

nice to know i'm not the only one with a penchant for the lowercase letters.

hiya CC welcome to the lowercase club I can't be bothered to use upper case except when I'm REALLY [fill in the blank].

hello. i'm new here also.

i 'got away' with my AS due to being a musician. As such, we often hide behind our instruments/art but even when performing, it was like pulling teeth. however, as long as you were good no one took notice.

the symptoms always seemed to be somewhat masked, and as long as i kept my mouth (somewhat) closed in social situations, i only seemed odd.

thanks auntblabby.

nowonmai1999, i've noticed that some of us get lumped into the "quiet artistic type" category. i've actually been accused by someone earlier this year of "trying too hard to act weird" and that i was "making a fool out of myself". i couldn't really understand what that person meant... apparently being myself is trying to be weird?

that's what i keep having to remind myself every time i lose a friend.

this may sound silly but seeing those words come from somebody other than myself actually means a lot.