Does love exist? Or is it all made up rubbish?

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AspieOtaku
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14 Jul 2014, 12:01 pm

YourMajesty wrote:

When someone questions or denies the existence of 'positive' things such as love I don't actually debate them, but I ask what's bothering them and why. Such questions or denial usually aren't actual questions or denial, but a way to express a negative feeling or state of mind. So why do you ask, AspieOtaku? Do the things you mentioned make you feel disillusioned?

Well, sometimes I don't think true love exists anymore I have been hurt, betrayed, and lied to time and time again I have also observed other couples who end up fighting and lose interest in each other and breaking up.

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vickygleitz
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14 Jul 2014, 12:11 pm

otaku. I believe in love because I have it with my husband. Sometimes there is romance and sometimes there is sex. Sometimes there is not [ during periods of serious illness],but the love is always there.

I was 39 years old before I found what I have with Bobby. I really didn't think it was possible. Over twenty years later, it's even more wonderful.

Laddo
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14 Jul 2014, 12:15 pm

^This has warmed my heart considerably. I really hope I'm still in a loving relationship when I get to your age, Vicky

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TheGoggles
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14 Jul 2014, 12:41 pm

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VGelJhg4B9Q

Eureka13
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14 Jul 2014, 1:08 pm

Absolutely, love exists, but it can easily be confused with infatuation.

Infatuation is more like Aspie1 describes. Love between romantic partners is like Vicky describes.

Infatuation is generally based on caring for someone based on WHAT they are on the outside (pretty, rich, glamorous, flattering, etc.).

Love is based on caring for someone based on WHO they are on the inside.

Only love will outlast the ravages of time, because people who are pretty when they are 30 may not be so pretty when they're 40, or 50, or 60. People who are rich when they're 20 may lose it all at any time. Glamour will fade, flattery becomes meaningless after a steady diet of it for awhile.

Laddo
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14 Jul 2014, 2:20 pm

Eureka13 wrote:

^This

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/nationa ... -1.1523997

The couple in the article have been together for 81 years! If that isn't proof that love is real, I don't know what is

auntblabby
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14 Jul 2014, 2:25 pm

^^^
that couple is SO RICH with good luck.

Eureka13
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14 Jul 2014, 2:28 pm

Laddo wrote:

Eureka13 wrote:

^This

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/nationa ... -1.1523997

The couple in the article have been together for 81 years! If that isn't proof that love is real, I don't know what is

*Like*

Laddo
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14 Jul 2014, 2:33 pm

auntblabby wrote:

^^^
that couple is SO RICH with good luck.

Not luck. Just an immensely powerful connection to one another

auntblabby
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14 Jul 2014, 2:44 pm

Laddo wrote:

auntblabby wrote:

^^^
that couple is SO RICH with good luck.

Not luck. Just an immensely powerful connection to one another

I meant luck to have been able to find and keep each other in the first place. if I had what they had I would consider myself a lucky man.

Laddo
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14 Jul 2014, 2:45 pm

Oh, I see. Yeah, I would too

yournamehere
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14 Jul 2014, 8:31 pm

Some are incapable. Most are repressed because it hurts. My mom is pritty heartless. She says it. She makes people believe that she can experience it. Her interpretation of it is incorrect. It is more of a value system, and a thinking process for her. I'm sorry if that sounds bad.

When you ask some people questions about things that revolve around love, like the gift of giving, you might get an answer that can be far from love. most of the time the answer you get is more like the gift of getting. Most people enjoy love when they are on the recieving end of it. For the most part that is not love at all. It gives. And it feels good. It is unconditional.

The last lady I was with, I asked her about love, she told me love is a house? I ran away from that one. She keeps calling me too. I don't know what to do about that, but that is off topic.

KB8CWB
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14 Jul 2014, 9:44 pm

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BU3xx7rxVLY[/youtube]

^THIS^

Eureka13
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14 Jul 2014, 10:07 pm

^^ The love itself should not hurt. The LOSS of love may, however, be the most painful feeling in the universe.

AspieOtaku
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14 Jul 2014, 11:10 pm

Eureka13 wrote:

^^ The love itself should not hurt. The LOSS of love may, however, be the most painful feeling in the universe.

Thats too true, its also hurtful when you get betrayed and you love that person but that person doesnt love you back and merely took you along for a ride for her/his personal gain. :cry:

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14 Jul 2014, 11:26 pm

Aspie1 wrote:

Love doesn't exist, at least not between romantic partners. Family members love each other, spouses love each other, humans and pets love each other, even friends love each other (although it's more like comfort and respect than love). But dating partners, no way! It's not love. It's just attraction. The man is attracted to the woman's ability to give him sex, her looks, and her being his guaranteed date for events that require one. The woman is attracted to the man's status/wealth, his ability to protect her, and to the romance he provides (flowers, moonlit walks, etc.). Simply put, the attraction is toward something each person cannot give themselves. A woman will look awkward having a moonlit walk alone, not to mention putting herself in danger. And for a man, masturbating with one's right hand stops being enjoyable very quickly.

Simply put, the item offered by each party cannot be enjoyed without an opposite-sex partner. (I know nothing about same-sex dynamics, so I won't speak on that.) So both parties enter into an unwritten agreement of sorts: each one will give the other what they can give (romance or sex), and collect from the other what they want (sex or romance). It's a rational, albeit somewhat unfair exchange, since providing sex is free, but providing romance is costly. But the system is there, and it works, despite being unfavorable to aspie men. Still, whatever it is, it's certainly not love.

How can romantic partners not be in love but spouses can. Do couples magically fall in love udring their wedding? I don't see your logic there.

Also, although some people (of both sexes) often use a relationship to their own means, I don't think its true with ALL couples. Saying men only want sex and looks and women only want romance and money...is it still sexist when both sexes are equally degraded?

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