Recently I watched a TV program which profiled a child with mild Asperger's disorder. It made me take a take a look at my own self as a child and wonder if I could have had this disorder which had gone undiagnosed. I realize it's not possible to make any determinations or diagnosis simply by reading my story, but I'd appreciate your thoughts/opinions/input and opinion as to whether you feel I could have possibly had this disorder? I am now in my late 40's and only recently have wondered about this possibility.
So here's my story. All of my life I'd dealt with what I (and my family) had thought was being "painfully shy". As a toddler I'd avoid talking to strangers. In fact, the only people I spoke to readily were my parents, grandparents and siblings. My aunt used to "bribe" me with money to actually speak to her. Which made me even more self conscious about speaking to her. I can't explain it, I just felt very awkward speaking to people I wasn't familiar with. My parents used to say "Oh she's very shy" when a stranger would say hello and I didn't reply. My verbal/language skills were very good however, mom said I spoke early and walked ealy too. By the time I started kindergarten, while I spoke when spoken to of course, I found it difficult to speak aloud in front of class, make new friends, and never raised my hand to answer a question. However from first grade on, I maintained and A and B average in my grades. Again, the problem was, difficulty in making new friends, meeting people, interacting with children. One teacher told my parents that I prefered being alone and didn't often participate in group activities. Others said I was "quiet". ANother teacher labled me as "withdrawn". Also, for years I had a repetitive habit of twisting my hair around my fingers. (A sign???)
As the years went by and I entered middle and high school, I slowly "came out of my shell" so to speak, and made friends more easily. Still, I wasn't the popular one, didn't date all too frequently, because I still suffered from "shyness". As I matured I had several relationships, and became more adept and social skills and interactions. As an adult I now consider myself fairly outgoing, although deep down I still find it difficult to initiate personal conversation with strangers (prefering them to make the first gesture) and slightly uncomfortable around someone until I get to know them. However, once the ice is broken, I am very friendly and love to engage in conversation about various topics.
Sooooooo anyway....What do you think? As a child, did I display classic signs of asperger's? I'd love your opinion. Thank you.
26 Sep 2009, 7:12 am
