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Annmaria
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 23, 2011 8:39 pm    Post subject: Teenagers on the spectrum hating authority Reply with quote

My son whom I am probably years behind understanding, I know this is an average teenage difficulty but now he is beginning to resent the police or any person whom he see's as an authority figure.

For teenagers on the spectrum how do you curb this?
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 23, 2011 8:47 pm    Post subject: Re: Teenagers on the spectrum hating authority Reply with quote

Annmaria wrote:
My son whom I am probably years behind understanding, I know this is an average teenage difficulty but now he is beginning to resent the police or any person whom he see's as an authority figure.

For teenagers on the spectrum how do you curb this?


Well unfortunatly especially in this day and age there is good reason to dislike the police and other authority figures.....I was not really much of a rebel as a teen, but I did start distrusting the police and then the government after I had my rights violated by some cops. I do not hate all authority figures but I dislike anyone who thinks they are above me due to their position of power or takes it as far as abusing their power.

What problems is his resenting the police and other people he sees as authority figures causing? I might have advice on how to suggest better ways to deal with it so it does not interfere with his life too much.
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 23, 2011 8:50 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Don't all teenagers hate authority?
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Annmaria
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 23, 2011 9:11 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Yes I agree all teenagers hate authority, but when you have a teenager on the spectrum this becomes an issue, why, because they feel that the person in authority is misunderstanding them. If you are in the spectrum I don't really have to explain these points. If I do you should not be posting on here.
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 23, 2011 9:17 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Annmaria wrote:
Yes I agree all teenagers hate authority, but when you have a teenager on the spectrum this becomes an issue, why, because they feel that the person in authority is misunderstanding them. If you are in the spectrum I don't really have to explain these points. If I do you should not be posting on here.


A lot of times the person in authority is misunderstanding them.
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 23, 2011 9:17 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Sweetleaft thanks, my son I have talked about before is obsessed with violence he tries to get me to engage I am seeking advice.
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 23, 2011 9:19 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Annmaria wrote:
Sweetleaft thanks, my son I have talked about before is obsessed with violence he tries to get me to engage I am seeking advice.


Violence really is not the answer.....it is possible to have an issue with authority figures who abuse their power, or behave as though they are superior without being violent. I don't know how exactly to stop violence but I think that would be the main thing to focus on.
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 23, 2011 9:34 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Maybe you could try putting him in karate classes. They teach self discipline, and it's a good outlet for any young boy who might need some constructive physical activity.
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 23, 2011 9:37 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

My son is actively involved in sports thanks for the advice.
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 23, 2011 9:53 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I don't know if this will work for him, but it would have worked for me. Try explaining the logic behind society requiring authority figures, and why violence is anti-social and damaging to society (i.e. we would not have survived as a species if everyone was violent all the time). For every question raised, no matter how inane it may seem, a logical answer is required, as you cannot expect him to inherently understand social behaviour. Show him the "big picture".
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 23, 2011 9:56 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I'm 41 and I still hate authority.
So frequently people in authority abuse that authority.
But I also abhor violence.
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PostPosted: Sat Dec 24, 2011 1:24 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

When I was a teenager if you weren't my mother I wouldn't listen to you...and I didn't always honour my mother. I think what made me stop was turning 20. Sorry, that's not much help to you.

I'm mistrustful to police especially because of what I've learned of them over the years of them abusing their power. I think bosses abuse their power too and I will always question people about rules that seem unfair.
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PostPosted: Sat Dec 24, 2011 2:04 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Same as above. I resented authority because they did nothing to gain my trust and rested on some unwritten understanding that I have to obey them. This was especially true when it seemed obviously clear that what they were doing was wrong in some way. But also, for me, violence was obviously wrong. I didn't and still don't really understand property rights though.

When I turned 20, I felt I had enough control over my life to listen to authority figures and still retain my autonomy.

Maybe you could give him more control over his life? Choices go a long way.

Also explaining the "Social Contract Theory" might help.

Edit: Why does he see violence as the answer? If he's reading anarchy theory (not a bad thing in itself), violence for the good of everyone is sometimes justified (that, to me is the bad part). You'll need to explain to his adequacy why violence doesn't lead to good (but that's a hard thing to do when you live in America, land of we should kill for independence).
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PostPosted: Sat Dec 24, 2011 2:37 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I recall witnessing a scene. A man was calmly talking to a police officer, next moment he was slammed against a paddy wagon and hand cuffed.
A lost a bit of respect for police that day, and this was after a policeman came to my door after a neighbour said I was breaking into my own home. Autism. Didn't speak much. He thought I was drunk. Anyway this police officer was really nice to me when he found out the truth.
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PostPosted: Sat Dec 24, 2011 3:06 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Annmaria wrote:
Yes I agree all teenagers hate authority, but when you have a teenager on the spectrum this becomes an issue, why, because they feel that the person in authority is misunderstanding them. If you are in the spectrum I don't really have to explain these points. If I do you should not be posting on here.


I've never heard of this diagnostic criteria before. I don't understand why this is an issue, and I don't see why I shouldn't be posting on here because of that one little thing.

I often felt that people in authority were misunderstanding me. This was often because they were misunderstanding me. I don't see why this is a problem for your teenager? It sounds like a problem with the authority figure. Are autistic teenagers simply supposed to accept what authority figures say without question because they're autistic?
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