Advice about rigidity/anxiety?

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I was wondering if anyone could give me some advice regarding my 5 year old son. He can be quite rigid and obsessive, and this leads to meltdowns. I don't know how to talk him through his feelings while this is going on.

For an example, today we went swimming with his 3 cousins. After they got out of the pool, the other kids began to change their clothes, and my son immediately started telling them to leave their swimsuits on. He got very upset at the idea that they were done swimming, and started saying, "Oh no, oh no, they're putting clothes on....", and then he began to cry. I tried to calm him down, but he got more upset and tried to kick at me. After a few minutes, he settled down and played with the kids.

It breaks my heart to see him get so upset over things that NT kids don't think twice about, and this happens almost every time that I try to plan an activity with other kids. I'm getting very nervous about him going to kindergarten in the fall, even though he will be in an Autistic Support class.

If anyone has any advice on how I can help him get through these moments, I'd really appreciate it.

Thats the problem though.. you cant help and by trying to interact with an autistic during a meltdown more often than not your only going to escalate the situation.

He was kicking at you for a reason.. he was trying to say "leave me alone, give me a minute and Ill be ok".

I know your instinct is to try to help when someone you care about is in distress but you have to understand that during a meltdown hes not sure what hes feeling either and needs time to work it out.. with you (for lack of a better word) pestering him it only increases his confusion and frustration and makes things worse.