Short list of complaints about Aspie Affection

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AnAlias
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28 Sep 2008, 1:49 pm

Aspie Affection is a very cool website and a neat idea and I have met some cool people on there, however it does have a few minor issues about it, and since there is no link to contact the webmaster on there, they go here:

1. There is no link to contact the webmaster. Really every website should have one of these.
2. There is no way to report abuse. This is probably not a big problem at the moment, however I did spend some small amount of time in conversation with someone named gloria4wilfred, who said she was from Nigeria, and kept telling me how cute she thought I was, and then said she was coming over to my area to visit me, and oh by the way, her father left her a rather large sum of money conditioned on her having a man in her life and would I help her get it. I have had no way to report any of this. Aspies are probably more likely than a lot of the rest of the population to fall for a scam like this, so we should have some way of reporting when something like this occurs.
3. Auto-logout after 15 minutes. This is extremely annoying. Do you know how many times I have been writing a really long message, hit the send button, and been sent back to the login screen, and found my message completely lost to all time? Yes, you can copy and paste your message before you send, but sometimes one forgets to do that, and you shouldn't have to do it anyway.
4. Bug which occasionally causes a message to not get sent and to send you back to your homescreen when you click send. The messages doesn't show up in your send messages, but sometimes messages get sent even though they don't show up in sent messages. There should be some screen after you send a message that says "your message has been sent," or somesuch.
5. Bug which, when looking at views on your profile, causes your picture at the top of the page to be replaced by the picture of the first (oldest) person to view your profile on the list. Not sure exactly what causes this, or if it happens to everybody, but it happens to me at least.
6. Big, giant, pink and red banner on the top of every page that says Aspie Affection. I mean really, is there anything that could scream more loudly to anyone who happened to be walking past my computer, "Weird people dating site"?

Again, very cool site, I like it, it just has some minor issues with it.


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AnAlias
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28 Sep 2008, 1:58 pm

Oh one more.

7. Automatic email address removal. If I put my email address in a message, it is presumably because I want the person I am talking to to email me. It makes very little sense at this point to just cut it out. I mean that kind of makes sense in a public forum where you don't want to make emails visible to spambots, but it makes no sense at all in a private messaging context.


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Quatermass
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25 Nov 2008, 4:58 am

Ticker wrote:
Here's my complaint about Aspie Affections- Even though I posted under a lesbian profile some stupid guy responds to my ad wanting to date.


Unfortunately, some jerks do not take a hint, or otherwise hope that you're Bi. I blame Ian Fleming.


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sinsboldly
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25 Nov 2008, 8:52 pm

Here is my complaint about Aspie Affection:

No Webmaster

Merle


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AnAlias
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25 Nov 2008, 8:56 pm

sinsboldly wrote:
Here is my complaint about Aspie Affection:

No Webmaster

Merle
seconded.


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EnglishLulu
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04 Dec 2008, 11:02 am

I don't know if anyone knows the answer to this, or whether it's a glitch...

But at the bottom of my profile there's the rating thing. And it says that there are "2 comments." I can't see them, where are those comments and what have people said about my profile?



Tim_Tex
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09 Dec 2008, 3:08 am

AnAlias wrote:
Javid wrote:
If we're going that way with the gripes, the horrid male/female ratio could use some work. Perhaps it's fixed in the new PHP build?
I believe I heard a figure that something like 1 in 13 diagnosed aspies was female, so that probably can't be helped.


It's 1 in 4, and that's only those with a formal diagnosis.

It may actually be 1:2 or 1:3, or could even be half male/half female.


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biostructure
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14 Dec 2008, 4:02 am

I know all my comments on here related to dating have been complaints, and I also am not signed up on Aspie Affection (and don't plan to), but upon looking at it I noticed one thing that seems it could use improvement, and that is the fields available to both write in and to search by.

I notice there is no place to put what kind of relationship you are seeking. There is "looking for", but that seems only for male/female or nothing else. I would find the site more useful if it had some feature like this--not just to differentiate between "casual activities" and romantic relationships, but also with options for purely platonic friendships, short-term vs. long-term romantic relationships, etc.

For me, the biggest difficulty with the NT dating world is that you rarely can just come out and say what you are looking for--so you either get people who want to be friends when you want a relationship, or want a relationship when you just want something physical, or want something physical when you want to date, etc. From this perspective it seems very ironic that the one dating site specifically for people with ASD has among the least opportunity to specify this of any dating site I've seen. There's a site that I really like called OKCupid, and that I might join (well, technically I have, but using a "fake" blank profile just to take some of their funny personality tests) and they have options all the way from "casual encounters" to "new friends" and "activity partners". Plenty of Fish and Lavalife have something similar. I see there is a field for marital status, but seriously if someone is unhappily married and looking for something "on the side" I can't see him or her ever answering yes here, and if they are just looking for friends it would be much more helpful to have a "friends" option in "looking for" that could be used for searching.

Shouldn't we be leading the way in trying to model a dating process with as little of the ambiguity and non-transparency of the NT dating scene as possible? This is especially true considering that the ASD community may have even a much larger spread of sexual desires and tastes than the NT population. Considering what I have read on this forum about fetishes, asexuality, etc., it seems there may be people who want anything from roleplaying sex on a spaceship, to hours of cuddling with nothing else, to someone to sit down and read a book with, or possibly several of these at different times. It's good having a place where not everyone expects you to be "normal" and people won't find you creepy, but as long as the ability to show what you do want is more limited here than elsewhere, I don't think it helps that much simply that there are more aspies here than there. Aside from the fact that I don't want to limit my partners to those with ASD, this is the other reason I don't think I will join that Aspie Affection.

I don't mean to imply by the length of this post that there is all bad and no good about Aspie Affection, but I wanted to say this, and wanted to state it clearly.



AnAlias
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20 Mar 2009, 1:12 pm

8. Auto deletion of old messages. I shouldn't have to remember to flag messages to avoid having them be deleted. I will decide which messages I want to delete.


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hartzofspace
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25 Mar 2009, 4:12 pm

Well, since these complaints have been sitting here since last year, unnoticed or acted upon, I am going to delete my account at Aspie Affection. I have asked for help, too, and not gotten help with some glitches there. :?


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jrknothead
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25 Mar 2009, 4:34 pm

It seems to me that Alex is the kind of web developer who spends a lot of time on a site, puts it up, and then ignores it forever because he's working on other projects... any glitches he's aware of during that initial construction get dealt with, but after that, he's MIA... even on this site, it seems that Alex has better things to do than site maintainance... I bet one dollar he never reads this message...



hartzofspace
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25 Mar 2009, 4:50 pm

Well, it looks like I can't delete my profile, because after I canceled my membership, I went back to check, and it is still there! Makes me think of "The Hotel California." You can check out any time you like, but you can never leave.


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hartzofspace
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13 May 2009, 1:18 am

jrknothead wrote:
even on this site, it seems that Alex has better things to do than site maintainance... I bet one dollar he never reads this message...

I bet my last donation that he never reads it! :lol:


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KnightGhost
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23 May 2009, 1:27 pm

AnAlias wrote:
sinsboldly wrote:
Here is my complaint about Aspie Affection:

No Webmaster

Merle
seconded.
Which is a problem because the site has been down for a week.



MathGirl
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23 May 2009, 9:46 pm

I tried to talk to Alex about the problems with aspieaffection, but he did not care at all. I know that he's really busy, but he surely couldn't be the only person responsible for it?
It seems like he has abandoned the website altogether..



hartzofspace
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23 May 2009, 11:32 pm

MathGirl wrote:
It seems like he has abandoned the website altogether..

That's what I suspect, too. It's a shame, because in real life, Aspies have enough difficulties with socializing and dating.


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